I can't do this today.
After a very VERY long fucking night of waking up every hour to stop the weird ass dreams I was having, I finally got up and got myself ready and STRUGGLED down the stair case.
Fit was fire though.
The top was a white oversized linen button down, with the sleeves up and a couple of buttons undone.
Which lowkey took me so long to get over my hair because I was not trying to mess it up after how much product I put in it.
The bottoms were these high waisted, slightly loose black jeans with a thin leather belt that my dad used to beat with back in the day.
I think they flow nicely and…
Nevermind.
And then i had on some boring white sneakers, because they were the first thing in my closet.
I also had on a sliver chain.
That.
Wait you cant even see that.
I unbuttoned another button as i walked down the stairs.
And i had some rings on my fingers.
And my backpack which is an outfit ruiner, but god forbid a man have to go to school.
I made it down stairs and my dad and theo were oddly close and it felt.
Felt very off.
"Uh good morning?" i called out.
My dad step back and barely looked at me and theo gave a weak smile.
Vibes are all off today.
My dad goes to get something out of the fridge and i sit down and start to eat.
Theo didnt sit down.
I watched as my dad got some orange juice out of the fridge and theo quickly walked over to him.
He poured it for my dad mumbling something at him and then walking back to the table still not sitting down.
What the fuck.
"How'd… how did you sleep last night baby?" Theo asked and I looked at him.
He does not look good at all.
I look at my dad. "Fine, i kept waking up in the middle of night because of a weird dream i was having, but other than that, fine." he was pacing and mumbling shit under his breath.
Thats so weird.
So fucking weird. "How about you?"
I looked back at theo and he is looking at my dad for an answer.
"Theo."
"Yes?" he said looking at me. "I asked you," i said.
"Not dad."
"Oh yeah, sorry baby," he gave me weak smile. "I slept okay, your dad…dad was just uhm taking up the bed."
I itched my lower back.
Terrible fucking vibes.
"You look kind of sick, do you want to sit down?"
"Hes okay."
I looked at my dad. "I didnt ask you." bitch.
Theo look very sluggish and almost like he had a fever, i just wanted to make sure he wasnt over working himself helping my dumb ass dad.
"Im okay, just a little bit tired." i stood up and pulled a chair out for theo and gestured for him to sit down.
"Honey bear, i am fine."
"Sit, just for a little bit," i said and he does.
I sat back down and continued to eat.
I watched as my dad walked over.
Like he was dragging himself.
AH FUCK NAH.
You know.
Im starting to think about the force bonding shit we learned about.
Like.
I guess its the soulmate shit is the equivalent to baby trapping if you dont love the person.
Soulmates kind of give you a false sense of a relationship.
And.
Im getting that vibe from my dad and theo right now.
Heavy on that vibe right now.
My dad hovered behind theo.
"Fuck dad, sit down stop being so weird."
He snarled at me, just like he did yesterday, but this time it felt…felt more possessive, i dont know i cant explain it.
Like.
Like he ONWED theo.
"Dont tell me what to do."
"You are GROWN man, sit down."
He dragged himself over to next to my chair and i stood up.
And what?
Just because I got moms height gene doesn't mean I'm not gonna fight your ass.
"And what?" I said out loud this time and he looked at me, with fucking anger.
Rage.
"You dont tell me what to do," he said with his finger all in my face. "You dont tell theo what to do. Thats my job."
Your what?
Oh no.
I dont like that.
Oh fuck no.
I rolled my eyes.
"Do you hear me? He's mine. I dont need you asking him 20 million fucking questions, got it? Hes FINE…" he stopped.
"He just needs a good fucking and." i opened my mouth and looked at my dad all crazy. "He will be fine."
HUH?
Thats.
Gross.
"Youre disgusting and bitch."
"Who you calling a bitch?" my dad asked grabbing me by.
By MY NECK?
I heard a chair scooched out and next think i knew my dad got shoved onto the ground.
I turned to theo.
Damn.
He walked over to our medicine cabinet and grabbed what…looked to be a syringe.
And he started to point it at my dad.
Way too much is happening for this early in the moring.
Im overstimulated.
"Dont lay a finger on him, do you understand me?"
"You."
"DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME? YES OR NO LUCIEN."
"Yes, im sorry."
Theo stabbed the syringe into the side of his neck and helped him stand up.
My dad was still conscious but his head was slumped down.
"Sorry you had to see that, honey bear, go get in the car and i will be right there," theo said with a smile as he walked my dad to the living room.
The car ride was extremely quiet, not a single sound, not music, no nothing.
"You have a good day honey," theo said forcing a smile.
"Thank you theo, you as well…uh make sure dad doesnt hurt you when im gone."
Theo smiled. "He wont." chills.
I nodded.
Oh fuck no.
Whatever.
I just need.
To.
That will be a problem to deal with after school.
I cant.
I dont.
Oh god.
I feel.
I feel like i have had these thoughts before.
This.
This paranoia.
Of my dad and theo.
But to me there were just friends at the time.
It didnt matter how weird my dad acted.
It was fine.
Now its not.
Its so not fine.
You cant treat the people you love like that.
Just like jasper said.
You cant.
What if.
What if theo isnt okay and my.
Oh god i feel physically sick.
Am i going to end up like that?
Like all of these people around me?
So.
I cant.
I cant like.
Like a.
Guy.
Just like i couldnt at my old school.
Its always going to end up wrong.
I cant.
I cant end up like the people around me.
I couldnt.
Neither of them.
Not even.
I cant.
Nate.
God why am i thinking about him right now?
I cant even.
Fuck.
I cant.
I felt someone slam into me.
Please be him.
My brain played images of him over and over as i tried to get it to stop.
"Dang is your phone okay?"
That.
That wasnt.
I looked up.
There stood a guy with messy curls that stuck to his head, warm brown skin, hazel eyes and black horns with gold streaks running through them.
He.
I recongize him.
Hes definitely in one of my classes.
And.
He.
HE WAS JASPERS PARTNER YESTERDAY.
I picked my phone up and it was thankfully okay.
I smiled at him. "Yeah, thank god." i said standing up.
He was pretty tall too.
"Are you…cassidy?" he said.
Fake.
"Yes, and… i know you are on the basketball team, but i cant remember your name," i said as the two of us got out of the way so people could walk by.
"My name is thomas." unlike him pretending to forget my name, im not going to pretend like i remembered his.
"Its nice to meet you," i said.
"You as well. Whats your first class?" he asked.
"Demonology and supernatural history."
"Im in that class with you." i smiled, why did you ask then?
"Do you wanna walk together?" i asked and he nodded.
This guy was very put together and actually, normal, if i even want to put it that way.
He was very friendly.
I looked up as we were walking.
I felt my heart start to beat as i saw nate.
He waved at me.
I waved back.
I watched as he stopped the two of us.
Niche reference but that meme where that guy puts his arms around that girl and she gasp is the equivalent to this.
And i dont even know why my heart is racing so much.
"What class?"
"Demonology and supernatural history," i said and he nodded. "You want me to walk you there?"
No way.
My heart needs to stop.
"No thank you, you can go to your class, ill see you later," i said.
Is that mother fucker wearing a turtle neck?
His eyes shot over to thomas and then at me.
His eyes travled to my neck and then back to my face.
He nodded licking his bottom teeth and walked away.
"Youre friends with nate?" damn let him get out of ear shot first.
"I wouldnt say friends but sure." thomas nodded and didnt continue the conversation further.
We made it to class and i sat down with jasper and his friends that i forgot the names of again.
"Is it cool if i sit with you guys?"
I nodded.
Thomas sat down.
I have this weird feeling, that im going to ignore.
The class went about the same, more work and bullshit.
I looked up at the small horn of jaspers friends i cant rember the name of and he gave me this weird look.
Oh.
Does he not like me?
I looked back down at my computer.
Thats weird.
Thomas and i were talking and he is genuinely so normal.
Turns out he does soccer outside of school and basketball in school, which is a weird combination but cool.
"I like your outfit by the way," he said with a smile.
Hes so normal i love it.
"Thank you."
"He runs a fashion instgram." i snapped my neck over to jasper and hit him lightly as he cackled.
"You do?"
"Yes but literally ignore him, my step dad and i run it," i said shaking my head.
"Hey if you dont want me to see it thats okay. But its no wonder your outfits are so good." outfits? Meaning hes saw me the first two days i was here.
Weird.
"Dont flatter me."
"No, no, its my pleasure," he said and the two of us started to laugh.
After the class was over we got assigned some bull shit homework that i am going to have a field day with because i wasnt paying attention at all.
Me and thomas compared schedules and it saddens me deeply but me and the normal man only bave this period and last period together.
"I will see you then or maybe at lunch, up to you," he said with a smile that one would describe as flirting but i think its just his personality or him being nice.
I smiled and waved him. "Ill see you at lunch then." he nodded.
"He seems nice," jasper said.
"Dont you literally have class the other way?"
"I do, but i wanna know about you and homeboy."
"Thomas?"
"If thats his name."
"Yeah, thomas. Literally nothing we met like an hour ago and hes just nice, is all."
"Righttt," jasper said.
"You are a weirdo, i cant." i shoved jasper off of me. "Go walk back that way and go to class."
He started to laugh as he walked off smiling at me.
Fucking weirdos i swear.
This school is filled with them.
Im smiling though so its okay.
Fuck i thought i had the weird elmental class next.
But i have the fuck ass combat one instead.
"You miss me?" i sigh as i see vincent walking towards me.
I shook my head.
He had a weird vibe today too.
Weird.
We sat down together.
I am not in the mood to get my ass kicked right now.
"Come on you guys know the drill, partner up and start doing warm ups and the basics."
I stand up and the two of us start stretching.
"Nates bed is so uncomfortable." i felt myself gulp and vincent smiled.
"Probably because there was 3 of you and you are all big."
"Some of us are big in other departments to."
Bruh.
"I dont recall asking."
Vincent shrugged. "Up to you."
"I like your shirt, did you up button that low so you wouldnt mess up your hair when you put it on because you are too lazy to unbutton it? Or so people could see your necklace? Or…" his smile grew. "Because you want someone to see certain things."
He winked at me and i pushed him.
Holy run on.
"You are literally so annoying."
We start to pratice the footwork drills that the insutcrtor had planned out on the board.
"Am i right or am i right or AM I RIGHT?" he said a little too loud for my liking.
"You are right on the first two, the last one, FUCK NO," i said and he started to laugh.
"Practice your blocking and dodging."
Vincent got closer to me and i felt my heart start to race.
This bitch lowkey scares me.
"What you have a crush on me too?"
"Too?"
He winked at me.
"You are gross." he started to throw crazy ass punches at me.
Fuck he has me sweating.
"You know, you should see nate shirtless, its truly amazing."
"Arent you in a relationship? I am telling jasper."
He grabbed my arm and flung me over his shoulder. "Great work vincent!"
Bruh.
"Let me down," i said hitting the back of his neck as he laughed.
He let me down.
Despite insutctor S saying we are gonna alternate days on notes we took notes on fighting forms and what worked and what didnt.
"Of course this kind of training is important in case of every day fights and if you want to go to the military."
I turned to vinent and he was staring blankly at the paper.
Jasper.
His hand writing is kind of bad but readable for my nosey ass.
Im sorry.
I dont know whats wrong with me.
I never do.
I dont know why i have been all crazy.
I will find a way to do better.
And i understand i do.
If.
He didnt write anymore.
Oh.
I feel bad for reading that.
"For your homework, i will either put online or email a video or two for you guys to watch, please do it. Class dismissed."
I got up and vincent shut his notebook and put it in his bag.
He gave me a crooked smile.
He took my backpack from me and walked me to my third class.
"Thank you," i said with a smile and he nodded and walked away.
I still feel bad for reading his note.
I sat down.
Here we god damn go about all of this magic shit.
Elemntal branches: fire, earth, water, air and shadow.
Considered a fifth elemental but very controversial to many.
Sensetive asses damn.
Pratical spells, lower grade.
Ignis flicker (fire) tiny flame in palm, used for light or intimidation.
Aqua sphere, floating bubble of water, beginner level magic.
Do different types of demons have elemental specific powers or how does that work?
I dont know.
Terra grip, strengthen grip or anchor feet to the grond.
Ventus push.
Fuck ass name.
Small gust of wind, useful for balnace disruption.
Umbra veil, blur your outline for a few seconds, good for stealth.
The rest of the shit she was talking about i learned yesterday either in this class or another one.
"So you can get in groups and practice casting stances and basic spells." right.
The teacher walked over to me. "You are allowed to just observe and take notes."
I nodded.
I watched as my classmates got in groups and started to pratice.
I felt myself gulp.
Being left out.
It.
It was normal, i guess.
Fire=agressive, draining.
Water=endurance, flexible.
Earth=stability and defense.
Air=mobility and speed.
That went by pretty fast.
Mainly because i just stared at the thing i had written down and connected it to what she said earlier.
"For your homework you are going to write a two paged double space paper." FUCKKK. "On one of the five beginner spells. I want you to research its origin, practical implications and ethtical concerns. If you are able to pratice hand signs and record your results in your journals. Extra credit: compare the risk shadow and elemental spells."
What the fuck.
Well i know what im writing about.
Whatever the fuck the shadow one is.
It just.
I feel like i can relate to it in a way, because the spells just remind me of how i am feeling here.
Which.
I dont know.
Is weird.
I guess also part of me wants to pick it because of nate but we are gong to push that down.
All the way down.
I made my way to fuck as literature and i made it through about half of the class before i left to go to the bathroom/wander the halls.
Fuck that.
You must have lost YOUR MIND if you think i am reading out loud.
Especially all this weird demon shit.
I still kind of feel uneasy about this morning, but.
I.
I sighed and pulled out my phone.
And just like yesterday clicked on theo's contact as i walked down the hallway.
He picked up on the final ring. "Hi baby, are you going out to eat again?"
I shook my head. "Oh uh no, i was just calling to ask if you were okay from this morning."
Silence.
"Uh, yeah i am fine baby, you dont have to worry." oh i am fucking worrying.
"Are you sure? You didnt look to good and dad…he was acting weird." his heat is genuinely making him unrecgonizable in good and bad ways, mainly bad though.
"Im sorry you had to see that honey, i just didn't want him to hurt you," theo said, but his voiced sounded different.
It sounded almost.
It wasnt fear.
I couldnt really place my finger on it.
But it wasnt fear, which is good i guess.
"Its okay, uh please stay safe," i mumbled.
"Oh i will." sadistic.
That was the tone of voice.
Something like that.
It lowkey gave me chills.
"Well, okay, im going to head back to class," i lie.
"Okay honey, i will be there to pick you up." and without even a goodbye or i love you.
The phone line went dead.
Holy fuck.
Uh.
Well i think hes okay now.
I felt myself stop.
I was back in front of the same bathroom i found nate in yesterday.
Motherfucker.
I am walking into a trap AGAIN, back to fucking back, swear.
I opened the door and my nose was invaded with that god awful fucking smell.
And there nate stood smiling at me. "I thought youd never come."
I heard the door slam shut behind me as nate put his hand up.
"Do you live in here or something?" i asked and nate smirks at me.
"Now i do, if it means i get to see you," he said walking towards me slowly.
I scrunched my nose up.
"You stink," i said pushing him back slightly.
He blew smoke all in my face. "You know you love it."
"I actually dont."
He just smiled. "You wanna try?" he said holding the vape out for me.
"No."
"Why not are you a pussy?"
Right.
"No i dont want lung cancer, turtle neck boy," i said and i watched as he tensed up.
"What hit a nerve, you thought nobody would notice the turtle neck? Its hot as fuck dumb ass, why are you wearing that?" i felt a pang of jealous come out of nowhere.
Why do you think he would be fucking wearing that?
"I." he paused, his face was unreadable. "When i use magic its gives me this disgusting skin condition, so i use it to cover it."
Oh. "How come i dont believe that?"
"I would show you but its ugly," he said going back to vaping in my face.
Nasty ass.
"Sure." he blew smoke in my face again and i felt myself flinch.
He laughed. "Youre cute when you flinch."
"You are disguting and going to hell."
"But you are still standing here, though?" right let me take my dumb ass back to class.
I pushed past him and tried to get into one of the stalls. "I know you arent here to use the bathroom."
Hes so right.
I turned around and sighed. "Can you bring back nice nate, why the fuck are you being all freaky?"
He gave me a freaky ass smile. "You make it so hard to play nice."
"What does that even mean?"
"You heard me. Its more fun this way…" he started to eye me like he did in the hallway earlier. "Nice outfit, did whats his face help you pick it out?"
Venom.
"Who?"
"The guy you were with early."
"Thomas."
"I don't fucking know."
"Yes thomas, uh no he didn't, I picked it out myself, why you like it?"
His eyes stopped on my neckalce again but this time didnt move from it.
"Matches my rings," I said, holding my hands up and smiling.
He reached my eyes again.
Nothing.
"I wasn't looking at the necklace," he said with a smile.
"What were you looking at then?" what the fuck is he talking about?
"What that freak was probably looking at too."
"My shirt?"
"Sure," he said with a fake smile.
What in the world?
He winked at me.
The fuck.
"Your eyes twitching."
He smiled again. "It's called a wink, dummy." I feel the soft Nate coming on.
"Why are you winking at me?" I asked with a crazy look on my face.
He blew smoke at me as he walked closer.
I felt my back hit the wall and I put my hands out. He smiled.
"Do not try to kabedon me, this aint no anime."
He started to laugh as he smiled at me. "What does that even mean?"
I rolled my eyes. "It means get the fuck back."
He smiled at me just staring at me.
He leaned forward.
I felt myself gulp. His horns were bigger then they were yesterday.
They were protruding out of his head, curling and they looked.
Looked like they had veins running through them.
He tilted his head at me. "You wanna grab them again or was it just a one time thing?" he started pout. "Oh please dont let this be a one time thing."
He then started to laugh.
"Man shut up," i said glaring at him.
His head was still tilted and still looking at me.
You.
You know.
I.
I blinked.
For a second i was for real going to, just to feed into it you know? Yeah of course, just to play his little game.
But i.
I pulled back and walked past him towards the sinks.
I felt hands grab my hips and spin me around.
He pushed me against the sink as he started to laugh. "You should see the look on your face," he said as he let go.
"You are weird, dude." hes being more.
More playful then aggressive.
"You are just so fun to mess with," he said as he looked at my outfit again.
"You…" i felt myself get warm in the face. "You are FREAK!" i said.
I patted my face.
"Im gonna go back to class, and i hope you do the same," i said pushing him.
He laughed.
I walked towards the door and i look in the mirror as he followed behind me, putting his vape in his pocket.
I watched as the door opened and i turned around to see nate and his fucking magic.
We walked outside. "Thanks."
"Anytime."
"What class?"
"I can walk there myself."
"But thomas can walk you to class, right," he said and i looked at his face.
He didnt make eye contact with me and suddenly the posters on the wall were way more interesting.
What the fuck is he on about?
"I have whatever the butt fuck literature class is called."
"Fine, ill walk you over." Didn't you fucking offer?
"You dont have to."
"Its fine."
I nodded and the two of us walked in silent.
"Uh."
I looked at him. "Yes?"
He itched the back of his neck.
Why is his skin pitch black?
Thats weird, but i wont pry, maybe its some demon shit i dont know about.
"Did you see my…uh follow on instgram?"
"Oh." i opened my phone and clicked on instagram.
@nazrael
"Is azrael your last name?" he nodded.
"Uh i combined nate with azrael but with the a and i…i am gonna stop talking now." i laughed.
I followed him back. "Its cute, very cute."
I clicked messages and sent him a hi. "I followed you back and dmed you," i said with a smile and he nodded.
"Uh thank you."
"Anytime," he opened the door for me.
"Sorry i found him outside the bathroom and he couldnt remember how to get back," nate said with a smile as he tapped my back lightly.
"Thats so kind of you to help him, thank you nate."
"Thanks," i said waving him off.
The rest of class went just as boring as i expected and next thing i knew it was lunch time.
I walked over to the cafeteria and i saw jasper, his friends, and oh THOMAS.
I grab my food and go sit with them.
I watch as jaspers two friends both shot me looks and then go back to what they were talking about.
Oh they definitely don't like me.
"How was class?" thomas asked.
"Pretty good, it already feels very repetitive, but its okay."
"Yeah this school gets like that very fast," he said eating and i nodded.
For some reason.
Some very weird reason i felt myself looking for nate.
There he was, with his little goons and…youll never guess who just got up.
Here comes the prowler vincent.
"Jasper," i said and he gave me a look. "What?"
I winked at him and he rolled his eyes.
I pointed to behind him and i watched as his shoulders dropped.
"Why not just tell the whole table? Why are you too talking with eyes and hand signals?" oh.
That tone.
It wasnt playful.
It was.
Nasty.
"Rhea, its all chill, its just an inside joke," jasper said as he quickly turned around and used magic to push vincent back.
I felt the smile grow back on my face.
"What are you smiling for?" thomas asked.
I just shook my head and let out a quiet laugh. "Its nothing, just jasper's too funny."
Thomas slowly blinked at me with him smiling as well.
"Youre cute when you smile," he said.
"Thank you," i said brushing him off as the two of us continued to eat.
"Yeah right." i turned once again to one of jasper friends.
Jasper had gotten up and i didnt even realize it.
Him and his little boy toy probably snuck off some where.
I just laughed it off.
The comments continued on as they more and more about me being human and into my.
My skin color.
Yeah no.
"Well." i stood up with my tray.
"Im gonna throw away my food and head to the bathroom real quick, ill be back."
"You want me to come with you?" jasper said as he came back.
Notice how his friends only said the crazy shit when jasper was gone.
Fucking insane.
"No, its fine, i will be back." i was not coming back.
I threw away my trash and i felt myself wandering.
I still really havent looked around this school.
I just have gone to class, and gone out to eat, not really exploring.
I wandered the halls looking at the numbers go up and down as i climbed each of the floors.
This school is like a mega mall, my lord.
Library.
Cool.
I opened the doors and i slipped in, heading towards the back.
I sat down facing the door.
It was pretty big in here but i dont want anybody sneaking up on me.
I pulled out my journal.
But not the homework one.
What the fuck is even happening?
I think that being human makes people want to target me more.
Giving me unwanted attention, but i guess thats better than nothing?
Right?
Better than no attention, i guess.
But.
Even in a human school i had unwanted attention, just because my dad was a demon.
Just because i didnt want to talk to anyone.
Just because.
Because i liked boys.
But i like girls too, so why is it a problem?
Why does no one ever remember that part? Just the guys.
Just THE guys.
I.
Nate.
Hes making it come up again.
All of these weird feelings i have tried since forever to push down.
People say i am feeling this way because my dad and step dad, but.
I.
I didnt even know they were dating, didnt even know they were married.
I had these feelings before.
Way before.
Feelings i have pushed down for so long that they arent even real anymore.
None of my feelings are real.
But stupid fucking nate.
Hes making it worse.
So much worse.
And i don't understand.
Because i have tried so hard to push that shit down and here we are again.
With the same story from back then.
This happens again and again and again.
But this time.
I dont know.
It feels different.
He feels different.
Maybe its because hes a demon.
I really dont know.
I dont.
I should be scared of him.
Not.
Not feeling this.
Not feeling this for a guy i just met.
Not again.
I fall way too easily.
Way too easily for everyone, especially guys.
Its awful.
But this time i am going to ignore it.
Ignore it so fucking much.
Push it all the way down.
So far down.
I dont.
I dont need him.
I dont need any of them.
I.
But i.
He had my heart racing and my face getting all red.
I cant.
I.
I heard the bell start to ring, i shut my journal.
I sighed and closed my eyes.
I opened them again, whatever.
Whatever.
Fifth period with my favorite couple here we go.
I opened the door and the two of them werent talking.
I forgot that people dont know they are dating.
I watched as jaspers face lit up as i walked in the room and he sat up.
Thats.
Thats such a good feeling.
I gave him a small smile back.
I sat down next to him. "Where'd you go at lunch?" oh.
Your friends fucking hate me so i left to go be a loser and write my feelings. "I was going to come back but then i realized i really dont know where anything is," i said with a fake smile.
"Oh, okay cool, did you have fun?"
No i mentally spiraled. "Yeah, i found the library and it was pretty chill."
He nodded.
I pulled out both my notebook for this class and my journal.
"Whats that?"
"A notebook? Do you not take notes?"
Jasper shot me a look and pushed me. "I am not talking about that, im talking about that one," he said pointing at my journal.
"Oh my bad. I just write stuff in it. Like what im feeling i guess."
Jasper nods.
"Thats pretty cool." your boyfriend does it too when he has to pay attention in class, but we wont get into that just that.
Vincent was very much on his phone, no notebook, not pencil, no hand all over jasper.
Oh.
Well they are still sitting together, so.
I alternated between listening to the teacher speak and watching the two of them.
Still nothing.
I genuinely have to ask because i hate listening more than anything.
I tapped jasper lightly and he turned to me.
He had…this sad look in his eyes, i.
Oh. "yes?" now i dont wanna ask, i really dont want to ask.
"I…um." i feel myself stuttering. "How was your guys sleepover?" a smile grew on his sad face.
"It was fun, felt kind of like old times." i gulped, part of me feels left out of something i wasnt even in to begin with. "Expect, of course things change with time."
I nodded. "I understand that."
I wanted to ask more.
Ask more questions about nate, but i felt myself stop.
"I guess." jasper stopped as i watched vincent tap on his shoulder. He turned around.
"Yes honey." just quiet enough for the two of us to hear it.
"Im gonna go over there and sit with Jacob and them," he mumbled.
"Do whatever you want," he said.
"I know, i just wanted to tell you."
"Thanks for telling me," he said and i watched as vincent walked off.
"Okay back to what i was saying." that. That was nothing like any of the stuff i have seen between the two of them. "I guess it nice to hang out with them, like we, im sorry I, tried on clothes for them. We gossiped, we fought, just like when we were younger, it felt very nostalgic."
Thats nice.
"And sleeping in the same bed as vincent is always a plus because hes so weird about us with his parents."
Fuck it. I am just gonna pry. "If its a plus, uh, if this isnt prying or weird, i. Um…Why are you too acting so uh weird? Like you know?"
He blinked slowly at me and then itched his collarbone.
Okay so now I am going to hell for asking.
"Oh yeah. We are working on "us" and i guess our dynamic."
"So you guys are taking a break?"
"Not like that, we just have things we need to work on. On both of our ends its definitely communication, and hes working on love bombing and only treating me good when he wants me to forgive him or other things. We talked about after the sleepover so i guess…we are taking a break."
"Oh.
"Yeah. Sorry that was a lot."
"It was just enough," i said and he smiled at me slowly blinking.
So i spent most of the class shit talking and the three of us walked out and thank god we didnt have homework.
"Can i hold your backpack?" vincent asked and jasper nodded thanking him.
Starting over.
"Do you want me to hold your bag too?" thats not, i turned around.
I was right, it wasnt nates voice.
"No thank you thomas i got it," i said with a smile and he started to laugh.
"What class do you have right now?"
"i have soul studies or whatever."
"Right, i am in that class with you too." why did you ask then?
I nodded.
"Hows your day been?"
"Pretty good, i feel like im getting used to it and i have people to distract me from life."
"That's real."
Jasper turned around to smile at me. "Well, we will leave you and lover boy alone."
Bitch what are you talking about?
I waved to him and thomas and i continued to talk.
"How about you?"
"Better now that youre here," thomas winked at me with a smile.
"Okay meat ridder, how has your day actually been?" i said laughing at his joke.
"Its actually been good."
"Oh really?"
"Yeah."
"Thats good," i said holding the door open for him as he thanked me.
Nate was sitting in the same spot as he was yesterday. He looked up at me and then at thomas and back at me.
I sat down next to him.
"Pull up a chair," i said with a smile to thomas and he nodded.
I needed him to balance out nates weirdness.
"Hi nate," thomas said with this weird smile i couldnt explain.
It wasnt the smiles that he'd been giving me, it was…different.
Nate didn't respond.
I pinched him. "Be nice."
"Hi thomas." he grumbled.
"Good boy." nate gave me a weird look. "That was too far," i said starting to laugh at my own comment.
Nate let out a little laugh as i shoved him laughing.
"Its ironic, because you arent a good boy," i said trying to itch the bottom of his chin.
He pushed me and gave me this weird half smle.
I gulped.
My heart was racing again.
Let me calm my stupid ass down.
"Hello, if you are all ready we can start class," the teacher said and everyone started to quiet down.
I pulled out my notebook as i started to listen.
Last period lets hit it to the beat.
"Today you all will be practing something called soul echo linking. It is a beginner exercise where you synchronize your energy flow with a partner or partners for three minutes." professor llona said, i just realized that was her name after a hard first day of not paying attention.
And wait didnt we do something with groups yesterday?
Whatever.
"Your goal is not to not overpower, but to balance. Breathe, focus, and let your auras brush. Write down what you felt afterward. Pairs will be graded on clarity of your reflectiont." be fucking for real i dont even think i can do that shit.
I get grouped with the man himself nathaniel and thomas because we were all sitting together and i cant do magic.
"So we can take turns and cass you can help us notice what we cant ourselves," thomas said wih a warm smile.
I smiled at him. "Yeah that works."
Nate doesnt say anything and just has this nasty expression on his face.
"Does that sounds good demon boy?" i said in a baby voice and his expression changed just for a split second and then he rolled his eyes.
Hes so weird i cant.
Thomas reached his hand out and i backed up so they can do whatever this shit is.
Hes being very respectful and calm.
He feels so normal and kind its great.
Nate reaches his hand out, with the same nasty look on his face.
Nates hand was shaking.
It was slight and i really dont think thomas noticed bit it.
I dont know it felt weird.
He kept looking at me.
His eyes.
They were on me.
"I want you guys to describe what you perceive, even if you dont touch the link." be for real what does that mean?
Oh god she is coming over.
Fuck.
Fuck.
"Cassidy?" i looked up at her. "Yes?"
"What are you feeling?"
"Left out?" i said and she smiled.
"No like what aura are you feeling?"
"Im not sure what to be looking for because…im human," i said awkwardly.
"I know that, but even humans can feel it even if its slight. Especially if there soulmate is a demon." here we go with this shit. "They can feel it even more."
Okay.
"Um. i dont really know. It feels…kind of like two completely different worlds are clashing together, but i dont know if thats what i think of their personalities or the activity."
"Now thats perfect, now what else are you feeling."
"Like." heavy on the i guess dont fight for something in the middle. "I feel like they are fighting for something in the middle, like trying to reach something, i feel its just for a second and then it goes away just like that."
The professor smiled at my answer. "Excellent insight, probably the best i have heard. Keep tracking that, will you." i nodded and started to write it down with my notebook in my lap.
I watched as she walked away.
"You should also mention that thomas is a freak," nate mumbled laughing.
I pushed him lightly. "Hes actually normal unlike you, leave him alone," i said, laughing.
And i caught thomas reaction out of the corner of my eye and he was giving nate a nasty look.
Do they have some unsettled beef or what because what is even happening?
"Relax, youre the freak whose sparking like crazy," thomas's normal face was now back.
I dont know what that means but i still want to laugh.
Nates eyes flick over to me and its almost like they softened.
Then they went back to giving thomas a death glare.
"You wanna write anything else?" nate said with an eyebrow rasied.
Uh. "yeah let me just think."
"Hurry up," nate said.
"The first time was great, you are better at this thank you think," thomas said, smiling.
"Or maybe you are just being a dumb ass?" nate said and for some reason i couldnt help but smile at his comment.
Maybe it was he had a smile on his face.
It was sincere.
"Yeah, yeah. It feels like this kind of heat and tension," i said writing as i go.
"Heavy on the tension, hey it might be sexual who knows?" i said joking and i watched as the two of them quickly pulled their hands away as i started to cackle.
"Fanfic coming when?" i said as i started to laugh louder.
"Lets settle down especially the gentlemen in the back." i covered my mouth as nate let out a chuckle.
I watched as his hand went down to my knee and sqeezed. "You hear that? It means shut up."
I felt my self gulp.
What is even happening?
"For your homework you will write a half page reflection on the experience. And the prompt is what metaphor describes your aura best, and how did it react to your partner? For those of us who watched just describes auras and reactions and image your own aura might react if linked."
I packed everything up in my bag and shut it.
My bag was then ripped out of my hands by nathaniel.
"Um nathaniel thats my bag," i said.
He licked his teeth and started to walk. "Lets go, we have pratice."
I followed his ass as thomas followed me.
"Is he always like this?"
"Always? i just met him," i said smiling and thomas.
He didnt smile.
Oh okay.
Bitch.
We made it to the locker room with silence going between the three off us.
Nate dumped my backpack in my locker and i thanked him.
I took off my rings and put them in my locker.
"Cassidy."
"Yes nathaniel?" i turned around. Oh hello, someone has, has a turtleneck compression shirt on? What in the world?
It was different from the one he had on earlier.
"Here." he handed me a little bag.
"You can put your rings in there so you dont loose them," he said and i smiled.
"Thank you kitten whiskers you are being such a good boy," he gave me these tired eyes as i started to laugh again.
"You warm up to people fast," i truned around and it was thomas who was without shirt.
He should definitely put that back on becasue it was COLD in the locker room.
"Not really," i said. I had zero friends at my old school and the only ones i had were.
Were.
Yeah.
I.
Never fucking mind.
"You warmed up to him fast." i mean i did, but i, i still dont really know a lot about him and i dont know if i would consider this.
I.
I guess it is warming up to him, hes just easy to make fun of and then he makes weird ass comments at me.
Its like a win win and a loose loose all at the same time, you know?
"I guess so," i mummbled.
"So you warm up to people fast, or was it just him?" venom.
I put the rings in the bag nate gave me and put it in the locker.
"No comment." i said and unbuttoned my shirt.
"But i."
I felt a hand go on my shoulder. "He said no comment," nate said.
Thomas gave me a fake smile. "Of course."
Of course?
Whatever.
I continued to unbutton my shirt and i pulled it off keeping it close to me and trading it for my jersery.
I watched as nates hand on my shoulder reached over. "Fuck you. Fuck you," i said and he started to laugh.
It was warm.
It made…made me feel warm.
I turned around still holding on to my shirt as nate tugged the other end.
"Nathan please, think about my nips they are gonna be cold, please," i said laughing and he smiled looking at me.
"One oogle a week, you are already past your limit," i said and i yanked him hard.
I grabbed onto more of the shirt and pried his big ass fingers off one by one.
I finally got him to let go and put the shirt over my head.
"I let you win."
"Good."
I changed my pants for the shorts and then we headed out into the gym.
I didnt even notice thomas was already out here.
"You two lover birds ready to go," coach said.
And nate put me in a head lock. "So ready coach," he said and then pushed me letting me go.
"Okay, laps!" the whole team started to run.
See nate can be normal when he wants to.
I also need fucking running shoes.
Two most pressing matters in my life right now i guess.
Back to fuck ass nate.
Like why is he being so weird…he.
Well no he has his own normal would be a better word, not actually normal.
Maybe its something weird and twisted in me, but.
But.
All the guy crushes i have, have been ass holes.
Not that i have a crush on nate, but i think im okay with his rudeness from time to time becasue of the previous crushes i have had.
Come to think about the girls were rude too.
Maybe its time for a self reflection on my end.
Coach annouced partners and i was with thomas and i watched as he smiled.
"You ready to go?" i nodded with a smile. "Yep!"
We started to pass and dribble as normal, but something felt off.
It was normal.
He was normal.
Hes geniunely just a nice guy.
Hes kind.
Not throwing the ball at me with full force.
But passing it like a teamate should.
But something feels off.
Maybe its because i feel him going easy on me.
I dont know if its because he doubt my abilities but it really does feel like it.
Or maybe i am just looking for problems, digging for a reason to hate someone whose not.
Not nate.
Jump scare.
We did another 2 v 2 and I couldn't help but smile when i saw nate.
I know he doubts my abilities, but he doesn't go easy on me.
Its.
Its twisted.
And weird.
But it makes me feel good.
Makes me feel like i can get better and actually have chance in their weird demon basketball world.
Oh and his fuck ass friend was there too.
Vincent's bitch ass.
Thomas started to talk to me about a plan.
But i felt all about him, him, him.
How he was going to block nate, how he was going to block vincent, how he was going to shoot.
"You do know that i can play basketball right?" i asked.
He started to stutter. Rightttttt. "Yeah i know you can…it is just…just i dont want you to get hurt."
"I will be okay," i said.
"Why dont i block nate and you get vincent?" i asked.
"But."
The coach blew the whistle.
Nate got the ball and started to dribble.
I quickly ran over to him and got the ball.
I dribbled that shit while smiling at him as he gave me one of his half smiles.
Wet and hard.
Who said that?
I dribbled down the court and i shot it, giving us our first three points.
I passed the ball back over to the coach as i felt hands go on my lower back.
"I was going easy on you," a voice whispered in my ear.
"Nathan thats not your partner, hands off," coach said as nate started to laugh.
He wasnt going easy on me, he isnt nice enough to do that.
This time thomas got the ball and he started to dribbble with vincent blocking him.
You do know that i am open for you to pass right?
Rightttt but we would rather struggle in silence then ever past to a human.
Fucking dumb bitch.
I watched as vincent stole the ball from him and i quickly ran over and attempted to block his huge ass.
It half way worked but i felt my back slam against the floor as i came down.
Hey at least he didnt shoot.
"Cassidy are you okay?" i heard coach call out.
I nodded, standing up.
I was so not okay, but i feel like every practice its something new with me, so let me shut my dumb ass up.
"My bad," vincent mummbed.
"Apolgize." it was nates voice.
"I did."
"Actually apolgize." i watched as black veins that were visible past the goofy turtle neck compression shirt he had on turned black.
Demon shit?
"Im sorry cassidy," vincent said.
The black veins didnt go away.
Thats.
Thats so weird.
"Thats why you have to be careful," thomas said, lecturing me like im incapable child.
"Im okay, i will live," i said, igrnoing the throbbing pain that was taking over my back.
We continued to play.
Thomas still didnt pass to me and the points we did have, were all scored by me.
We ended up winning and pratice continued on.
Being so nice like that, also has its downsides.
Treating me like a fucking baby.
Like i cant do anything without him.
I dont know.
It feels off.
But maybe its because he is just being nice.
Pratice ended and thomas, nate and i were walking to where theo's car normally is.
Nate was holding my backpack as i put back on my rings. "Thank you kitten whiskers for holding my bag and heres the bag you gave me bag."
Nate gave me a side eye and didnt say anything.
"Bye cass, my cars right here," thomas said and i smiled. "Okay bye!"
He tapped my shoulder as he left and i continued to smile at him.
Nate and i continued to walk.
"I dont like him."
"I know."
"You know?"
I turned to him stopping. "You are so hard to read but you were being so rude to him the whole day."
"He was pissing me off," nate said rasing an eyebrow.
"You hardly know the guy?"
Nate rolled his eyes.
They definitely have some unrequited beef and i want to pry.
"Were you guys dating?" i asked with a smile. And he pushed me. "Bitch im not gay."
"BITCH, you literally check me out on the daily, i dont want to hear IM not GAY. You clearly have a thing for men," i said.
And he rolled his eyes at me. "Im straight, i have had girlfriends before."
Tell me why i dont believe that?
"Yeah…" i heard a car horn slam.
I turned around and it was theo, without my dad.
I watched as he opened the car door and shut it, walking towards us.
"My life is over," i mumbled as nate laughed.
"Are you ready to go honey?" theo asked, staring at nate.
I nodded "Sorry the two of us were just talking," i said and he gave me a look.
He didnt believe me.
Just like i didnt believe nate just now.
"Uh theo, this is nate, nate this is theo, my step dad," i said and theo nodded shaking his hand.
"We had pratice together just now and he was walking me out," i said taking my back pack from nate.
"Well thats very nice of him," theo said in a certain tone.
"Bye nate, i will see you tomrmmow," i said waving to him and quickly walking past theo.
I cant.
Im done for with my dad.
I got into the front seat and theo followed into the drivers seat.
He put the car in reverse and sped out of the parking lot.
"At least hes nice."
"What?"
"At least your big horned demon boyfriend is nice." i slumped back.
"Hes not my boyfriend, and you better not tell dad that."
"I wont, i wont, you sure hes not your boyfriend?"
"Im very sure, and even if he was, which hes not, i wouldnt tell you guys."
"Why?" theo asked flooring it.
"Because my dad is a freak and you tell him everything."
Theo laughed. "Hes my husband, i have to tell him things."
"Yeah, yeah."
The conversation died down.
And i felt myself swallow hard.
"Are you okay after this moring?" i mumbled.
"Stop mumbling and i am fine, thank you for worrying about me."
"Dad…" i felt my voice go raw. "Dad didnt hurt you did he?"
Theo shook his head. "No honey, he just isnt him right, but i took good care of him."
"Does that mean sex or you killed him?"
"Both." Oh!
"What?"
"At the same time too," theo said as he started laughing.
OH!
Fucking weridos omg.
"No, hes just. He sometimes acts like that when he gets his like, heat, you know? And its normally not a problem because i can hide it from you. But because your dad sees you as a threat, it becomes a problem."
"Are you and dad force bonded?" i felt myself blurt out.
I didnt even think about it.
"Are we what?"
"Like…you guys are bonded right?"
"Yes your daddy is my soulmate."
"Daddy is too far."
"What hes my daddy too."
I gave him a side eye. "Ignoring that. Like. We learned about it in school. Where you only bond for a certain reason not out of love, or when you only bond because of a freak accident?"
"Oh. yeah. No. i love your dad with all my heart and have for a long ass time. He does push my buttons and get on my mother fuckering nerves sometimes," theo said gripping onto the steering wheel.
"But truly i wouldnt want to spend my life with anyone else. And besides i got you as a plus," theo said with a warm smile.
So what if i started crying becasue that was so sweet.
I nodded with a smile. "I love you."
"I love you too honey bun," theo said with a smile.
"So," theo said and i watched as he gripped onto the steering wheel.
It was the stoplight right before the street to our house.
"So?" i asked looking at him.
"Are you gay?" he asked.
I shook my head. "No."
"Do you like guys?"
"If this is about nate…"
"Its not. Its not. It's just…i remember the other guy."
"What other guy?" i interjected.
"Ryan."
Oh god, i rolled my eyes. "Man fuck him."
"I heard yall."
"Rightttt. He was a character. Ignore that, it was a time."
"So i will ask you again do you like guys?"
"If you tell dad i swear i will never tell you anything ever again."
"My lips are sealed," he said pulling into the driveway. "So are you and lover boy dating? I mean hes not as handsome as your daddy." disguting.
"But hes a looker. I didnt know you liked them big. I mean ryan was big, but not that BIG."
"You need to stop." i said and theo started to laugh. "I just met nate and we are not dating," i said and theo sighed.
"Youre no fun."
We got out of the car and walked inside.
"Im gonna go shower and i wll come back down for dinner," i said.
Theo nodded as i walked up the stairs.
"That was a long time in the car."
What the fuck? "Dude why are you even in my room."
My dad was in his pajams standing there looking at me.
He started to walk torwards me as i put my bag down.
"You stay away from him."
"Dad, hes my step dad, i dont want him."
"Pathetic," my dad grumbled.
I should call… "honey bear." look who is already here.
Theo grabbed my dads hand. "Why dont you come help me cook and stop bothering your son?"
"But."
He pulled my dad. "That wasnt a question baby," he said pushing my dad out of my room and shutting the door behind him.
Fucking weirdos.
I took a quick shower and put on my boxers and some pajama pants.
I picked up my phone.
Nazrael: do you want me to bring the bag for you tomorrow?
Oh what a lovely suprise.
I started to walk down the stairs.
Me: i dont know what i am going to wear some more, but i will let you know. I think i might have one at home.
Nazrael: oh okay okay.
Me: sliding into my dms is CRAZY WORK
Nazrael: you did it first.
Me: I WAS JUST BEING NICE. You had to think about this and still sent it.
I watched as he typed and then his thing went down.
Me: im playing, im playing.
Nazrael: good.
Good?
I made it down the stairs and paused still looking at my phone.
Nazrael: did your stepdad give you a hard time?
Almost like he fucking new he was going to cause issues.
Me: yeah, but its okay, im lucky my dad wasnt in the car or else you would have been dead.
Nazrael: LOL, tell your dad i can fight.
Me: i didnt know you could fight?
I was teasing him.
Nazrael: righttttt
Me: i'll tell him and you guys could scrap one day.
Nazrael: i am looking forward to it.
Dming people is so weird, especially nate oh my god.
I put my phone as i walked into the living room.
"What were you smiling at?"
"Funny video on reels, i would send it to but you dont know how to even work your phone dad," i said, lying out of my ass.
"Right." he didnt believe me but thats fine.
I started to eat while staring down at my phone.
Me: do you and thomas have beef?
Nazrael: thats a story for another time
Me: so you do?
Nazrael: i am not confirming nor denying
Me: righttt
I shoved theos food in my mouth, drinking water every now and then.
Nazrael: what are you doing rn?
Me: why do you wanna know?
Nazrael: you ask why im not nice to you more and this is the bullshit i get when i am nice to you.
Me: IM JOKING, calm yourself. Im at dinner with my dad and theo.
I felt myself click the camera button and asked my better judgement i held the camera above my head and looked up at it.
I snapped the photo and for some weird reason i sent it to him.
I.
Why?
I watched as his icon went up and down a couple of times and then i watched as he saved the message in chat.
Me: what the fuck are you going to do with that?
"Who'd you send that too?" theo asked and i shot my head.
Forgot they were here too.
"One of my friends wanted to know what i was doing so i sent a picture of the food…and me." the food wasnt even in the picture.
"Shirtless?"
"Yes? We are both guys."
"Next time send it in your boxers only," theo said as he started to cackle.
"Bye."
Nazrael: putting in in my jom blackmail folder.
Me: what does JOM stand for?
Radio silence.
Nazrael: its something my siblings and i came up with but i cant even remember what it stands for.
I watched as a picture him popped up on my screen.
Me: now thats a thirst trap.
It was this weird angle where i could only see HIS ABS and that v line.
Suddenly i am remembering why i like men.
Dont get my wrong i love woman and i love the girl crushes i had, they were all…well big and…okay so i definitely have a type, because i just like my people big.
And nates not an expection.
NOT THAT I HAVE A CRUSH ON HIM.
I dont.
I dont even know him, but fuckk.
"Papa," i mumbled and theo looked up.
"You called me papa? Oh i might cry."
"Can i have your phone?"
"Why?"
"Nothing, i just need to take a picture of something."
"Dont be doing anything weirdo now," theo said handing me his phone.
I went to our messages and then snapped a picture of nates photo.
I deleted it off theos camera roll, his cloud, recently deleted and messages and handed him back his phone.
I saved the photo.
Now im the weird one.
Why am i still staring at this photo?
Voice recording is crazy.
"You like what you see princess?" i shut off my phone and in a panic dropped it onto the floor.
Let me sit my stpid ass down.
"Whose calling you princess?" my dad asked, he has this nasty look on his face.
Theo was smiling at me too wide.
And to be honest i am going to block this fool and then go die in a hole somewhere.
"No one, just a friend from school," i mumbled picking up my phone.
She was thankfully okay.
"I cant hear you, stop fucking mummbling." one thing they have in common.
"I said NO ONE, hes just a friend i made at school."
"The gay one?"
"No."
"Hes the one who walks you to theo's car?" my dad asked.
I nodded. "Tell his bastard ass to stay away from my fucking son."
"Daddy." i closed my eyes and took a deep breath. "Dad, sorry. We are just friends and joking around," i said.
Out here calling my dad daddy and theo papa all in one night what is even happening?
"Fine, ill believe you," my dad said getting up and taking all our dishes.
Theo gave me a look. "Why'd he cave so easily?" i asked him.
"Probably because you never call him daddy, but i reminds him of when you were just a little chubby kid," theo said in this baby voice.
I sucked my teeth.
I got up.
Me: SENDING ME VOICE MESSAGES WHILE IM AT THE DINNER TABLE IS DIABOLIC FUCKING WORKING.
It had been like 7 minutes since he sent that message but i have been geering that up for the past 7 minutes.
Nazrael: my bad.
Me: it is very much your bad
Nazrael: nate's sorry princess.
What is wrong with him?
Me: one talking in the third person is wack and two princess is wack, who are we jasper and vincent.
Another audio message.
I turned my volume down.
Thank god its just him laughing.
Nope. "do you not like your nickname?" he said in the same tone theo just said.
Me: stop.
He sent laughing emojis.
"Daddy." im going to hell.
"What?" my dad said.
"Can you go get me milkshakes from my favorite place on the corner?" i asked, putting on a DIABOLIC front.
Anything to get what i wnat.
"Please daddy," i asked.
"Fine." YES.
"Send theo, the flavor we will get it for you."
"Youre the best."
I watched as my dad walked into the living room.
Joy.
Joy in this retched home once again.
"You are terrible."
"So is my dad," i said sticking my tongue out.
"Can you get me a cookies n cream milk shake please?" i asked and theo nodded.
"We will be back. You be good."
"Always am."
Theo leaned in. "and no sneaking boys in your room to give them head."
I felt my jaw dropped as i stared at him.
Theo turned his head to the side. "Your daddy's stupid, im not."
"Im never leaving my room ever again," i said.
So should i jump off the railing now or when everyone is asleep?
Im.
I tried so hard to forget about that.
And i did a fasntic job hiding it and youre telling that this freak has known this entire time.
"Ugh im gonna die," i mumbled with my hands in face.
"Honey lets go," my dad said.
"Well me and your daddy will be back."
"Please never come back," i said and theo started to laugh.
I went back to my dming with nate.
Me: sorry, my parents were getting milkshakes and asking what i wanted.
Leaving out major details that he really doesnt need to know.
Nazrael: cute
Me: i guess.
Nazrael: back to earlier, what nicknames do you like?
Me: cass and thats it. I think cassidy itself is a little feminine but thats okay, but i like cass because its a mix of both
Nazrael: i wanna call you stuff that other people dont
Me: no
I pushed open my bed room door, pulling a bunch of shit out of my backpack.
Nazrael: why not? Like…
He stopped typing
Me: do you like it when i call you kitten whiskers?
Nazrael: FUCK NO
Me: exactly, thats how i feel with most nicknames lmao.
I opened my computer and looked through my email.
Instructor s said something about…oh heres the video okay cool.
Combat and defense–demon reflects and control
I pulled out my notebook.
Nazrael: you stopped responding.
Me: im doing homework.
Nazrael: you do homework?
Me: and thats why you are a dumb ass
He sent some laughing enojis
Nazrael: come on angel dont call me that
I felt my fingers freeze as i reread the message.
Angel?
I let out a light laugh.
Fear sense, demons can smell fear, use to intimidate in fights.
Heartbeat detection=advanced skill (only for certain bloodlines and big horns).
Big horns=strongest.
This video is genuinely stuff that i have already learned.
Me: if im an angel you are going to be demon boy, or maybe FREAK
Laughing emojis again.
Nazrael: whatever you want to call me sweetheart i will be okay with.
Me: kitten whiskers included?
Nazrael: FUCK NO.
I felt myself start to laugh
Nazrael: now thats too far
He said double texting.
Me: righttt
Everyone draws a line i guess.
Reflex drills, designed to sharpen speed + control magic output.
Do not overcast in combat, drains stamina, leaves you open.
Me: by the way
Im eating my own words right now with the double texting, make it triple texting.
Me: you played miserably today.
Anything to keep the conversation alive while i take notes on this video.
Supressants sometimes dull magic reflexes, controversial use.
Sparring ettquite, never go full form in class.
Full form?
What does that fucking mean.
"If you dont know, dont worry about it. Dont worry about things you dont need for this class." okay video, thank you for reading my mind.
anger=stronger attacks, but less control. Blance is key
Defensive stance=ALWAYS protect chets + horns.
Okay cool.
Im gonna send those notes into whatever the online portal website they used is called and be done with this shit.
Nazrael: I did? Now thats insane.
Nazrael: your fuck ass partner played like shit.
Now im getting all mad again.
Me: he doesnt know how to pass.
Nazrael: he doesnt know or he didnt want to?
I rolled my eyes.
Me: you know the answer so why are you asking.
Nazrael: so you can agree with me for once.
Me: fuck you
Nazrael: anytime you want, but im sure it would be the other way around.
Me: BRUH what is the matter with you?
Nazrael: my bad. I dont know. LOL.
I opened up my next assignment.
Nazrael: i told you i dont like him.
Me: i know i remember you saying that, i think he just didnt want me to get hurt.
Nazrael: and you did anyway? So whats it to him?
Nazrael: and you are literally a grown man, why do you need his protecting?
Me: rightttt.
Its because im human nathaniel.
But thank you for forgetting even if its just for this moment.
Nazrael: like…okay im not saying you are good or better than me for that matter
Me: here we go with these back handed compliments again
Nazrael: BUT you can play, and he was acting like you cant. And even if you couldnt whats it to him? Is he the coach? Is he your dad? Why does that matter to him? Why does HE have to baby YOU?
I feel.
I.
Me: i feel like you are getting more worked up over this then me, lmao.
Nazrael: my bad, i just really dont like him
Me: unrequited love, im telling you.
Nazrael: fuck you!
I felt myself smiling.
Double spaced paper, two pages is crazy work.
Shadow magic, is the branch of spell craft that manipulates light, outline and the thinner edges of the soul.
Im gonna write this shity ass essay and just get it out of the with.
4 messages.
5.
6.
Damn bro, let me open my phone up.
Nazrael: why arent you responding?
Me: i told you im doing homework.
Nazrael: well i am bored.
Me: so do youre homework.
Nazrael: nah, i wanna mess with you instead, wait lets call
Bitch what.
I watch as nates profile takes up the whole screen
I felt myself fixining my hair.
Thank god i haven't put on my bonnet yet.
Wait?
Why do i even care?
I clicked answer and nates smile lit up the screen.
I do not remember him having fangs.
He put the camera down and his neck and shoulders were this pitch black color.
"Hello," i said.
"Hi," he said with a bigger smile.
He was also shirtless and also sitting down at his desk.
"Why are you sitting down at your desk but not doing homework?" i asked.
He shrugged. "Its so i can call you and not look stupid," he said smiling.
I rolled my eyes.
"Okay." i said and went back to writing my essay.
Unlike the four classical elements (fire, water, earth, air), shadow has always occupied a gray area: some schools treat it like a defensive utility, others like a corruptive art.
Does that last part even make any sense?
"Are you writing an essay? Why are you typing so fucking much?"
Like a.
Fuck i dont know.
"Essay," i mumbled and he nodded.
Historically, Umbra Veil appears in the oldest surviving demon manuscripts from the Ashen Archives, where scribes described it as "the cloak of the wounded spirit."
Look at me using the sources she gave us and told us to use.
"You wanna read it to me sweetheart?" i gave him a side eye.
"Its not done yet."
"When it is, do you wanna read it to me?"
"Ill pass."
That origin story makes sense: shadow works on the border between perception and reality, so cultures used it for mourning, secrecy, and protection long before it was weaponized in duels.
I looked back over at him.
"Uh, is that why you were wearing a turtle neck today?"
"Huh?"
"Youre neck is black and so are parts on your shoulder. Is that why you were wearing a turtle neck today?" i asked repeating my question.
"Oh yeah."
"I saw it earlier, but i didnt wanna pry."
"You did?" he looked nervous.
"Yes, i thought i was hallicnating but then your veins started to turn black during pratice, so im like i defintely wasnt."
"Oh yeah." oh yeah what?
"It happens when i use magic."
"It does?" i asked. "So why do you keep using magic?"
"Im stupid," he said.
Now that i think about it, his horns are more curled and more…more alive.
"And the fangs are from that too?" he nodded sheepishly.
"I didnt see them during school, so did you use magic when you got home?"
"Thats sadly not how it works."
I turned to him. "How does it work then?"
"I thought you had homework."
"I do, but im now more interested in you and your problems," i said with a smile.
"So because my uh heat is coming, and i used magic, its just means it comes faster."
"Is that right?"
"Sort of," he said with this blank look on his face.
"So can supressants not stop it?"
"No. its just delaying the inevitable."
"You look like your dreading it."
"I am, i dont like who i become with it."
"Thats understandable."
"Yep."
I went back to typing.
In practical terms, Umbra Veil is taught as a stealth and concealment spell for beginners. The basic cast, a quick hand-sign and breath pattern, blurs the caster's outline for a short period (usually 5–10 seconds for novices).
"Did you shower?"
I nodded.
"Did you?"
"Yep, look at my hair." he said standing up and shaking his wet hair all in the camera.
Look at that v line.
I feel like im a victorian man seeing ankles for the first time.
"What? You think im sexy."
I closed my mouth. "You are objectively attractive, i dont know about sexy. But your boxers are WAY too low for you to standing up like that."
Dick swanging and everything.
"Im in my house, why does it matter?"
"It doesnt, just letting you know."
"Okay….hey wait, you called me attractive?"
"Objectively."
He gave me a half smile.
Even those fangs are attractive my fucking god.
He let out a laugh.
I heard a knock on the door, i turned around.
Wait that's not my door.
I watched as a man walked in.
He looked…
He was definitely nates father.
"What are you doing?" he seemed irritated.
"Doing homework with one of my friends." liar on two parts.
One you arent even doing homework.
And two i fear we arent friends.
"Cassidy this is my dad." i waved to the sexy man that was now standing in front of the camera.
I see where nate gets it.
"Is he a boy or a girl?" bro i look like a man.
"Hes a boy."
"Why is his name cassidy?"
"Dude, i dont know, just say hi."
His dad was giving me this look i couldnt even explain, but it was NASTY.
"Are you a human?"
"Yes i am."
"And you go to the demon school?" his look got more and more unreadable.
"Yes, because my dads a demon?" same energy right back at you.
"Right." and just like that THAT FREAK just walked back out, telling nate not to be too loud.
"Sorry about him, i dont know whats wrong with him."
"Its fine."
I continued to write my essay as nate bugged me.
I finished that as well as my half page reflection.
"You do know that you have to do that too?"
"Yeah, yeah, i will…later."
"When?! Do it now!"
"Okay, okay," nate said sheepisly pulling out his laptop.
"What are you going to go do?"
"Bruh, do your dang work."
"Jezz, okay."
Where are my parents?
I grabbed my phone and swiped out of facetime?
I clicked on theos contact.
Me: where are yall?
I put the camera back up.
We continued to talk every now and then as i started to get ready for bed.
"What are you putting on your head?"
"A bonnet."
"Whats that?
"Do your work and I will tell you."
"I am!" he sasid defensively putting his hands up.
I started to laugh. "A bonnet is something I put on my hair when i sleep so my pillow doesnt completely dry it out and it will be less firrzy."
"Oh cool."
"Yeah."
I heard a knock followed by laughing outside of my door.
"Give me one second," i said, standing up leaving my phone on my desk.
"GYATT."
I felt myself stop and slowly turn around with a horrified look on my face.
"Im ending the call," i said.
"No, dont, im sorry. Im sorry," nate asid laughing as he begged me.
"Man fuck…"
The knocking got louder as i heard my dad yell, "Open this door!"
I will yell at him later.
I turned and quickly walked towards the door.
I opened it and there theo and my dad stood.
"What are yall gay asses doing?"
I watch my dads free hand drop to his side instead of all over theo.
"Here is your shake sweetheart."
"Thank you theo," i said taking it, she was a little melted but thats okay,
"And thank you daddy," i said smiling.
My daddy started to reach in his pocket and handed me a 50 dollar bill.
Shitttt.
"Here, for when you need it."
I smiled at him. "Thank you daddy, you are too kind."
He nodded. "Well, uh enjoy your shake."
"I will."
I watched as the two love birds walked dwon the hall.
Ignoring what happened this morning and what has been happening all week, they are pretty fucking cute.
I shut my door. OH!
Nate.
"You call your dad, daddy?"
"Only when i want something."
"Thats fucked."
"Hes fucked."
Nate smiled at me.
Theo: why are you still awake?
I clicked on his message.
Me: i need to drink my milkshake
Theo: who were you talking to?
Me: would you believe me if i said myself?
"Why are you so close to the screen?"
Theo: no, i am not your father.
"Texting my stepdad, just give me a second."
"Okay," he said laughing.
Theo: why arent you responding?
Oh my lord.
Theo: did you sneak that demon into your room?
I heard knocking on the door again.
I put my phone back up right and clicked back on facetime.
"Whose at your door? I thought your parents went to bed?"
"They should have," i mumbled.
I stood up and yanked open the door.
"You got a boy in here?" theo mumbled.
"No, go back to sleep."
"Who are you talking to then?"
"A friend, we are on face time doing homework, i can get off call if you want," i said rolling my eyes.
"Who?"
"A friend, why does it matter?"
"Dont give me attitude, i will take that phone away."
"Okay, im sorry. I am sorry…its the demon guy you met earlier. We were dming about basketball and then he called me."
I watched as smirk appeared on theos face. "And you are trying to seduce him in your bonnet?"
"Im gonna jump and its going to be all your fault."
"I am playing honey bear, you still look handsome even with your bonnet on."
"Fuck you."
"If you are ging to bring him home, use your protection," theo said with a smile and i looked at him with a horffied look on my face.
"What? I know ryan probably wouldnt.."
"You need to stop, stop right now. We didnt even have sex, fuck you," i said and theo started to cackle.
"Love you baby."
I shut my door and just stared at it.
"Whose ryan?"
Oh and nate is still here.
"Nobody. Ignore him he is just joking."
His face didnt believe but he still nodded.
"Are you done with your work?"
"Probably," i mumbled.
I felt myself yawn. "I am probably going to get off and go to bed."
"For real?"
"No i was going to journal in bed and then sleep."
"Journal with me on call."
"I would rather die," i said and he started to laugh.
I took my phone plugging it in and getting into bed.
"Are you actually sleeping?"
"I will stay on for a couple more minutes and then yes."
"Okay, okay."
"Question for you," i asked.
"Whats up?"
He made eye contact with me and i felt myself gulp.
The questions not even that deep but i feel my heart beating in my ears.
And in my neck.
I gulped again.
"Be honest, were you and thomas a thing at one point?"
His smiled dropped and he started to yell out as i laughed.
"FUCK NO. I just dont like him, like we were never a thing, i told you that earlier and besides im not fucking gay."
"You dont have to be gay to like men."
"Yes you literally do what are you talking about?"
"Like you can like girls and boys."
"Well i dont, i only like girls."
I gulped again and this time i felt this ping in my heart.
"So are you saying, im a girl?" my voice felt oddly shaky.
He half assed laughed. "No, i dont like you."
Right.
Right of course.
We just met and.
And he doesnt like.
Like guys.
"Dont pout."
I snarled at him, "whose pouting?"
"Youre still good looking, i just dont find guys attractive," nate said smiling.
"Back handed compliment."
He rolled his eyes.
"The black on your neck is getting worse."
"Dont say that, i dont want to hear that shit."
"Okay," i said defensively.
Its like watching it in real time, seeing the black creep down torwards his chest.
"Wait."
"What?" i reponsed.
"Can i see your bed, because you are in such a weird position right now, i cant even tell where you are?"
"Not gay my ass."
"I am just wondering, god forbid," he said defeneisely.
"Why do your eyes look like that if you are just wondering?"
"Like what?" fucking chills.
He had a half smile.
His eyes.
They didnt look like him.
Like his eyes didnt look like how they normally did.
"I feel like you are going to come to my house or dox md online or something. You need to snap out of whatever the fuck you are in right."
I held the camera up.
"So heres my bed, and my pillows and my…" i stopped.
"Did you just take a screenshot?"
"No?"
"Your hands were at your side and now they are on the phone yeah fucking right you didnt take a screen shot."
His half smile grew. "And what if i took a screenshot? The fuck are you going to do about it?"
I put the camera back so it was normal. "I dont know probably call you gay?"
"Cool."
"No denying?"
He shurgged.
"What did you do with nate?"
"What are you talking about im right here?" no you so are not, because his eyes look different.
"Because not even 5 minutes ago, you were all im not gay, im not gay, you are good looking i just dont find you attractive. And now you are shrugging and fucking taking screen shots of me. Like freak are you good?"
"Im fantastic sweetheart, how about you?" his homework was so long gone at this point.
Maybe.
Maybe this had to do with the black on his shoulders and neck spreading.
"I think its time for you to go to bed."
"I dont think so."
"Oh i fucking think so," i said laughing as he gave me a half assed laugh.
"I havent finished my homework."
"You havent been focused on your homework for like the best 15 minutes, thats even more reason why i need to get off the phone."
"Then i wont finish it."
"You arent finishing it now."
"I will work on it, i will, i will," he said and he went back to typing.
I sighed.
Let me just journal with him on the call while he works.
I reached over and pulled the notebook out of my journal.
Where even was i?
Feelings.
Right.
Not i dont even want to write anymore
Right write.
Im funny.
"Did you know about jasper and vincent taking a break?
"What does that mean?"
"Like they are taking a break from their relationship, did you know that?"
"They might have told me, but i was like half asleep this moring so i dont know."
"Oh okay."
"Why do you bring that up?"
"I dont know I was just asking if you knew." im trying not to let the conversation die, thats why.
"Yeah, probably."
"Oh okay."
"Um."
"Do you work out?"
"Yep," he said flexing in the camera.
God i love men.
"That was a crazy reaction," he mumbled with a smile.
His.
His eyes were back to normal. "I didnt react, what are you talking about?"
"Your eyes got wide, you like what you see?" he said standing up.
I love that v line.
"No kitten whiskers sit back down."
"What did i tell you about calling me that?" he said and i started to laugh.
Bruh it was just too funny.
"Here. i will make you a deal."
"What kind of deal?"
"If you let me call you."
"No."
"You didnt even hear what i had to say."
"If its about the kitten thing, FUCK NO!" he said and i felt my smile grow wider.
"Please, just hear me out."
"No."
"Please."
"I said no."
"Please kitten whiskers, im begging you, just hear me out you dont have to agree."
"Fine, whats my end of the deal?" he asked.
I heard him typing but he was also looking at me at the same time so i dont know.
Maybe a demon thing.
"If you let me call you kitten whiskers, I will let you call me whatever you want, the princess shit, sweatheart, whatever, please, just let me call you kitten or kitten whiskers."
I watched as he rolled his eyes. "Fine."
My smile was way too big right now.
"Good choice kitten whiskers."
"Fuck you."
I smiled.
"Do you have any hobbies?"
"Are we playing 21 questions why the fuck are you asking me so many qetsions?"
"God forbid i want to…" i felt my voice die out.
I.
I want to know him a little better.
I.
I dont know why.
"Fine, i will see you tomorrow then," i said.
"Im playing, dont go."
"No fuck you, you lost your chance," i said.
He tilted his head to the side and gave me a half smile. "Im playing. Im sorry. Ask however many questions you want. Hobbies, hobbies, well i like basketball."
"I know that, give me another one."
"I dont…dont really have anything other than that."
"Liar why did you stutter then?"
"I mean i go to the gym a lot but i dont know if that counts as a hobby."
"It doesnt give me something else," i snapped.
"Jeez, jeez. Um."
"I know you have something in mind, just say it, im not going to judge you."
"I mean i used to play the guitar."
"You did?! Oh my god, sorry im interrupting."
"Youre fine. Yeah, when i was younger, i dont play anymore though."
"Why not?"
He shrugged. "I dont have time."
"Liar you dont do your homework."
"Woah you are reading through me so much tonight. I dont know, my dad doesnt like when i play it."
"But you enjoy it dont you?"
"I mean i did."
"So fuck him."
He smiled. "I guess."
"You have to play for me one day, are you also a singer or are you a one trick pony?"
"For your information i am a muti trick pony. And yes i can sing."
"Oh my lord, you just keep getting hotter." i closed my eyes. "Better, i meant better.
"Sure you did." i watched as he stood up.
Hello v line.
He went off camera and then came back with a guitar with a bunch of stickers on it.
"Are you going to play to be like we are in one of those dramas?"
He rolled his eyes. "No, i am just showing you."
"Cool."
"Yep."
"Whats your favorite song to play?"
"This isnt a good song to play on the guitar but its a good one to sing, but cant take my eyes off you by Frankie Valli."
"Are you just too good to be true? Can i perchance not take my eyes off of you?"
"Fuck you, dont egg me on becasue i will break out in song."
"You say that like its a bad thing."
"It so is because it is late as hell."
"Right," I said and I watched as he got up, putting the guitar back and coming back into the frame.
"Do you have any hobbies?"
"Fashion, journaling and basketball," i said and he nodded.
"Sounds pretty cool."
"Yep," i said.
"I think, fashion is really fun, because it gives me something i can talk to theo about and i stay throwing down fits."
"I have no idea what that means, but yes…i liked your outfit today."
"Did you now?"
"Yeah. i though it was nice, especially the necklace."
"My necklace?" i asked with my eyebrow raised.
"Yep, i know who also liked it."
"Who?"
"Thomas."
"Okay what the fuck are we talking about right now," I said laughing.
I think there is some strange metaphor that I am not getting at all right now.
"I think your shirt was unbuttoned way too low."
"Who are you my dad..." I felt myself stop. "Were you looking at my nipples?"
"Now I didn't say all that."
I covered my chest while looking at the camera with disgust. "You were looking at my chest a lot today, i thought you were just being awkward i didnt know you were a DOG."
"Hey I wasnt the only one doing it."
"Still doesnt it make you any less gay," i said smiling and he rolled his eyes.
"Genuinely not my fault you had them on display."
"I had a shirt on, and even if i didn't, as a straight man why you looking?"
"Man fuck you." I started to cackle.
Someone is so in denial right now. "No more oogling for the rest of the month after today."
"I don't even oogle you, you are over exaggerating it."
I rolled my eyes. "My point still stands."
We continued to have mindless conversations about literally nothing and I got to know him more.
I know he has 3 siblings and he's the oldest.
2 brothers and one sister and everyone is a big horn.
He might have told me their nmaes but i feel myself bobbing and weaving right now.
I.
And.
Oh fuck.
I felt myself yawn.
My eyes were starting to hurt from staring at the screen.
I put my head on the pillow still listening to him talk.
His voice was so soft and so warm when he wasnt being a fucking freak.
It felt.
It felt so amazing.
I feel.
I.
I yawned again.
I feel way too safe right now on call with him for someone who is supposed to be the enemy.
Oh my lord, im so fucking tired.
I.
Fuck.