Catching a Legendary Pokémon — that's not something you see every day.
Rare, sure, but not unheard of either.
Everyone's heard stories. Like that girl from Alola who supposedly travels with the embodiment of the moon itself.
But forcing a wild Legendary into being your mount?
Yeah, that's new.
That's not "Pokémon Trainer" behavior — that's Monster Hunter energy.
What's next? Gonna show off your "Dragon Riding Mastery" skill tree? Better craft a longsword first and start practicing your aerial slashes.
So of course, everyone watching thought Haru had officially lost it.
Give it a few minutes, they figured — he'd get bucked off, plummet from the sky, and turn into a bloody pancake on the beach below.
Some of the more squeamish trainers even closed their eyes, too scared to witness the splatter.
But somehow… the madman held on.
Not only that — he actually took control.
He was riding the Lugia like a pro, banking through the clouds as if it were his personal flight taxi.
Meanwhile, Lugia was losing her mind, twisting and diving in a desperate attempt to shake him off.
Didn't work. Not once.
For the onlookers, it was unreal — something out of legend.
In their world, only Pokémon could overpower Pokémon.
A human, physically subduing one? What was this guy, a humanoid Pokémon himself?
But Haru had actually done it.
And his target was no ordinary Legendary — it was Lugia.
"Who the hell is that guy? No, seriously — is he even human?"
"I swear I saw a little pink cat Pokémon around his neck. Was that... Mew?"
"If that's Mew, then that means he's—"
"Wait, that's Haru! The one who was rumored to have a thing with Iono! He's at it again!"
The crowd erupted — a few trainers had recognized him thanks to the signature Mew that was always perched on his shoulder.
What they didn't realize was that the pale-blue-haired girl floating above him wasn't human at all.
They just assumed she was Necrozma in disguise — after all, only two of Haru's Pokémon were known to take human form.
And since Mew was already twined lazily around his neck, the mystery figure could only be the other one.
Meanwhile, poor Goh had completely lost it.
His expression said it all: Some things that don't kill you really should have.
"This—this can't be happening! He should've been splattered by now!"
The man was trembling so hard he barely felt the pain in his shattered pride — or elsewhere.
Why him? Why was this lunatic his eternal nemesis?
Why did reality itself bend around this guy's nonsense?
As for Lugia — right now, Haru was more terrifying than a billion serial killers combined.
A Legendary like her was far from dumb; her intelligence rivaled, maybe even surpassed, most humans.
Even in her rage, she could still understand human speech — which made Haru's earlier threats hit way too close.
A godlike creature like her being used that way? The mere thought made her feathers bristle.
If word got out… she'd never live it down.
She'd be the punchline at every Legendary meetup — the one who got humiliated by a human.
And you just know that smug little Rotom Camera would be there to record every second.
Furious and humiliated, Lugia rocketed skyward and unleashed a "Death Spiral," determined to throw Haru off and save face.
But the more she thrashed, the tighter he clung.
It was infuriating — and to her horror, it only seemed to excite him.
Was this human getting off on the danger?
"Is he insane?!" she screamed inwardly.
"Fly! Head for the ocean!" Haru shouted, laughing wildly.
Sure, he'd joked about taking a leak earlier, but he wasn't that shameless.
There were lines even he wouldn't cross.
Flirting with a female Pokémon was one thing — but actually doing that on her? Yeah, no thanks.
Besides, Lugia wasn't exactly in her "girlish" form yet. If she was... well, that'd be a whole different story.
Still, adrenaline was coursing through him.
He'd flown before — with Necrozma, with Mew — but those experiences were more like riding a plane.
This was real.
He could feel every gust, every jolt of air pressure. His hair whipped back violently as they tore through the skies faster than any jet.
Frankly, anyone else would've been thrown off ages ago if not for Mew's subtle psychic tether keeping him in place.
Even most Pokémon couldn't handle this kind of speed — not without passing out or worse.
"Lugia," Haru called out, grinning as he patted her head, "I think I'm starting to like you."
Lugia screeched in outrage. The two shot across the heavens, diving over the ocean and accidentally crashing through a Meowth-shaped hot air balloon.
For a split second, Haru thought he heard familiar voices yelling, "Looks like Team Rocket's blasting off agaaaain!"
But considering those three were probably still serving time in jail, he chalked it up to hallucination.
The chase continued, the pair streaking far from the Kanto coast.
Just as Haru was about to try steering her, something red zipped into view beside them — a small, sleek jet-like Pokémon.
"Latias," Haru said with a surprised smile. "Didn't expect you to tag along."
She chirped happily, clearly thrilled to be part of the flight.
Riding alongside a Legendary? That's a story she could brag about for decades.
Unfortunately, for Lugia, this was pure humiliation.
Being ridden by a human — might as well call it what it was: violation of her divine dignity.
"Hey, calm down," Haru said gently, giving her head another pat.
"Talk to me, yeah? If you've got a problem, I'm here to help."
"And, uh, just saying — among Legendaries, I'm kind of a big deal myself. You should be honored I chose to sit on you."
"Don't think of it as being degraded," he added cheerfully, pulling out his Rotom Phone and switching to camera mode.
"Think of it as… collaboration."
He grinned. "Now, take me back to Alto Mare, and maybe I'll help you with whatever's bugging you.
But please — stop wrecking cities with storms and floods, okay? I'm sure even you don't wanna go through this again."
Lugia's only answer was an enraged roar as she twisted into another impossible maneuver.
She'd never met a human this shameless — this infuriatingly smug.
If she didn't drown him, she'd never sleep again.
"Fine, you asked for it!" Haru barked.
"Keep this up, and I'll start plucking your feathers one by one and write 'The Lustful Legend of Lugia' on your back in waterproof ink!"
"Oh, and I did catch a squid earlier — how about we roast it right here?"
He held up a wriggling Inkay and a tiny metal rack like some deranged camping vlogger.
Then, to top it off, he pulled out a lacy pair of underwear and slipped it onto Lugia's head.
"A gift," he said solemnly.
Lugia trembled in outrage as Haru added casually,
"Also, just so you know — if things get rough, I could totally use your body as a battlefield. I mean, these white feathers make great tissues."
That did it. The mighty Lugia froze mid-flight.
Then, in his mind, Haru heard a woman's voice — deep, mature, trembling with fury:
"A god will never submit to a human."
He blinked.
So she could speak — or at least project thoughts.
No surprise for a Psychic-type of her level.
He tugged lightly at her neck feathers, smiling.
"Of course, of course. A proud Legendary like you would never bow to mere mortals. I totally get it."
"But hey, maybe this is just a big misunderstanding. I'm on your side, you know?"
"Take me back to Alto Mare, and I'll help you fix whatever's wrong."
He hesitated — then asked half-seriously,
"So… what is it? Did someone capture your subordinate, or… your daughter?"
A long pause. Then, in his head again — soft, reluctant, but clear:
"…My daughter."
And for the first time since the flight began, the great white bird eased her wings, if only slightly — still wary, but listening.
"Your daughter's in trouble, huh?"
Haru exhaled slowly, his tone shifting from playful to focused.
"Well, that's something I can work with. If I had to guess, this has Team Rocket written all over it. Conveniently enough, I just happened to rough up a bunch of them earlier — maybe I can squeeze a few answers out before they respawn."
Hearing that Lugia's crisis involved her daughter actually relieved him.
For a moment, he'd worried this Lugia wasn't the one from the "storyline" he remembered — that he'd have to start his investigation from scratch.
Now, though the world's script had clearly gone off the rails, at least there was still a thread he could follow.
Maybe it led back to that Rocket scientist he'd heard whispers about.
Lugia, meanwhile, seemed to pick up on his sincerity. Her telepathic voice softened, still regal but less harsh:
"If this truly was a misunderstanding… then I will take you back."
"However, remember this — a Legendary will never submit to a human."
Haru chuckled. "Oh, I get it, totally. You're not submitting — you're just giving me a lift. Big difference. It's not like you're bowing naked before me or anything."
"..."
Lugia didn't dignify that with a reply. She merely rolled in the air, wings slicing through the clouds in a flawless 180-degree turn as she prepared to head back.
But just as she started to dive toward the horizon, Haru suddenly leaned forward and shouted,
"Wait — hold on! Someone's drowning down there!"
He pointed toward the glittering waves below.
Even from this height, his sharp eyes caught sight of movement in the water — the desperate flailing of a figure struggling to stay afloat.
It was a woman.
And not just anyone — she was stunning. Even half-submerged and half-conscious, the sunlight danced on her pale skin and long hair like something out of a painting.