The silence that followed was soft now. The kind that no longer pressed down on them, but filled the space like a blanket, warm, gentle, still a little heavy with what had been said, but not unbearable.
Tae sniffled once and wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. He sat up slowly, legs still tangled with Joon's under the sheets, and turned to look down at him.
Joon was watching, head against the pillow, hair slightly messy from sleep and sweat, his bare chest rising and falling calmly.
Too calmly.
Tae stared for a moment.
Then, without a word, he grabbed Joon's forearm.
And bit it.
Not hard, not enough to leave marks just enough for the pressure to sting a little.
Joon's eyes snapped open wider, completely thrown off.
"What the—!?"
Tae kept his mouth on his arm, eyes glaring but red from crying, his puffed cheeks full of mischief and frustration. He bit again, this time higher, then hugged Joon's arm tightly to his chest like a stubborn kid.
"I hate you," Tae mumbled against the skin. "I fucking hate how calm you are. I hate your voice. I hate your face. I hate your whole… existence."
Joon tried to pull his arm back. "Hey—ow! You little—"
"Nope," Tae said, holding on tighter, now wrapping his whole upper body around Joon's arm like it was his new stuffed animal. "You're not going anywhere. You're mine now. Human arm pillow."
Joon narrowed his eyes. "You just cried like a kicked puppy in my chest and now you're biting me like a feral cat. What even are you?"
Tae pouted harder. "Shut up."
"You're not normal," Joon said flatly, tugging his arm, but Tae bit down again. "Ow, fuck—what do you think this is, snack time?"
"Stop talking to me," Tae said dramatically, voice muffled. "I'm still mad."
Joon's lips quirked into a smile.
"Oh no," he said dryly. "The pouty baby's mad. Should I cry too? Or will your sharp little teeth come after me again?"
"I'm gonna kill you in your sleep," Tae muttered, still attached to his arm. "Like one of those unhinged widows in mystery dramas."
"Do I at least get a last meal?" Joon deadpanned.
"Nope. Just trauma."
Joon laughed then a full, rich laugh that made Tae scowl harder, even as his ears turned pink.
"You're insane," Joon said.
"And you're still stupid," Tae replied, lifting his head slightly just to glare before hugging his arm tighter and biting again.
"That's it," Joon said suddenly, shifting fast.
Tae blinked.
Before he could react, Joon rolled, using his height and strength to flip him flat onto the mattress with a yelp. Tae squealed as Joon climbed over him, straddling his hips and pinning his wrists down.
"No, no, no—don't you dare—!"
Joon smirked.
"Oh, I dare."
And then he tickled him.
Tae kicked and thrashed immediately, eyes wide, voice breaking into helpless laughter as Joon's fingers found the sides of his ribs and under his arms.
"STOP— you psychotic bastard—!"
"This is what you get for biting me like a toddler on bath day," Joon said, laughing too now.
"I hate you—!"
"Still calm now?"
"I hope your hairline recedes faster than your patience—!"
Joon laughed harder, switching sides as Tae twisted beneath him, shrieking and breathless with laughter, eyes tearing up again from how much he couldn't breathe.
"I'm gonna pass out—!" Tae gasped.
"You'll be fine," Joon grinned, finally stopping and collapsing beside him, arm flung over his stomach, both of them panting and flushed with laughter.
Tae rolled over, smacking him weakly in the chest, still breathless.
"You are the worst."
Joon turned his head, grin crooked. "You say that like it's not the reason you're here."
Tae glared. Then smirked faintly, voice dropping as he curled into Joon again.
"…Maybe," he mumbled, pressing his face into his chest. "But you're still stupid."
"Bite me again and I'll leave you tied to the bed all day."
Tae's mouth stretched into a lazy grin.
"…Is that a promise?"
Joon stared down at him for a second, then covered his own face with his hand, exhaling hard.
"…God help me."
Tae giggled quietly into his skin.
The laughter faded. Not abruptly, but slowly like a candle burning down to a soft flicker in the dark. Their breaths steadied, tangled legs under the blanket, both men lying flat now, eyes drifting toward the ceiling, where nothing moved but the faint shadow of moonlight through half-closed blinds.
Silence settled again, but this one felt different. Not heavy like before — just… tired. A little too still.
Joon turned his head to look at Tae.
His eyes were open. Blank, almost. Mouth relaxed but unsmiling. That earlier poutiness was gone, as was the playfulness. Now he just looked like he was thinking too much. Again.
Joon stared at the ceiling for another few seconds. Then sighed. Quietly. He reached for his phone on the side table and checked the time.
4:02 AM.
He hesitated for a beat, then slowly sat up, the blanket sliding off his chest.
Tae blinked, his gaze shifting toward him without turning his head.
"…What are you doing?"
Joon glanced down at him and ran a hand through his messy blond hair.
"Get up," he said, already swinging his legs over the bed. "Don't wash up, don't overthink it. Just throw something on from my closet."
Tae frowned. "What? Why?"
"We're going out."
Tae sat up halfway, brows knitting. "It's four in the morning."
"And neither of us are sleeping," Joon said, already tugging on a hoodie over his bare chest. "Come on. Just a drive. No one's out, no traffic, good air. You need to get out of your head."
Tae stared at him like he'd grown two heads. "You're being weird."
Joon shot him a look over his shoulder. "You bit me. You don't get to call me weird."
Tae's lips twitched, but didn't quite smile.
"Come on," Joon added, a little softer now. "Just… trust me."
Tae hesitated. Then let out a quiet breath and slid off the bed, padding over to the closet without another word.
—
They left the apartment quietly.
Tae wore one of Joon's oversized zip-up hoodies, sleeves swallowing his hands and a pair of drawstring sweatpants that sagged a little at the waist, cinched tight. His hair was tousled, his face clean but still flushed from earlier.
Joon looked at him through the hallway mirror once, brief and unreadable.
On the elevator ride down, Tae leaned against the wall, arms crossed. He offered a few soft replies when Joon made a dry comment about how stupid they both looked leaving in loungewear in the middle of the night, and even cracked a small smile when Joon faked a yawn loud enough to echo.
But his eyes…
Still red. A little swollen.
Still somewhere far away.
By the time they reached the underground parking garage, Joon unlocked the car with a quiet beep and glanced sideways.
"She know you're sleeping over?" he asked, keeping his tone neutral.
Tae nodded, pulling open the passenger door. "Told her before leaving the house yesterday, she just gave me a thumbs up with a grin."
Joon hummed as he slid into the driver's seat.
He didn't push.
The car started with a low rumble, headlights casting long streaks against the concrete.
Tae sank into the seat beside him, quiet again, knees tucked up slightly in the hoodie, head leaned back against the headrest.
As they pulled out into the early morning stillness, city lights glimmering faintly in the distance, Joon glanced at him again, briefly.
Tae was looking out the window, one hand curled loosely under his chin, eyes distant.
Joon gripped the steering wheel tighter, jaw ticking once.
"Let's find somewhere quiet," he muttered, almost to himself. "Somewhere with air."
He didn't say somewhere you can breathe, but it hung unspoken between them, just like all the things they weren't saying yet.
The city was sleeping.
Not a soul wandered the streets as Joon drove slow, tires gliding over near-empty roads. The sky was still dark, the kind of quiet that only existed in the hour before dawn. The car interior was warm, the heater humming low, casting a gentle hum under the soft whir of tires and the occasional streetlight passing overhead.
Tae-hyun hadn't said a word since they left.
He sat curled in the passenger seat, Joon's hoodie drowning his frame, eyes cast out the window as if trying to memorize every sleeping building they passed. His profile was calm, too calm but Joon knew better now. He could see it in the way Tae's fingers rubbed absently at the hem of the hoodie, the way his mouth stayed parted, just slightly. Like something was trying to get out but couldn't.
Joon hadn't said anything either.
But the silence was starting to itch at his chest, stretching between them like fog that refused to lift. His fingers tightened slightly on the steering wheel as he turned onto a slower road, one that curved uphill, giving a distant glimpse of the city lights below.
"I don't really do this," he said suddenly, voice soft but clear.
Tae blinked. Slowly turned to look at him.
Joon kept his eyes on the road.
"This… driving around in the middle of the night. Talking. Or not talking." He let out a dry breath, then glanced at Tae briefly before looking forward again. "I'm not that guy."
Tae didn't speak. But he turned in his seat a little more toward Joon. Waiting.
Joon's fingers tapped the steering wheel once. Then again.
"…But with you, I don't know. I don't really care about being 'that guy' anymore."
He said it quietly. Not dramatic. Just like a fact. Like something that had already been true for a while, and he was only now realizing it.
Tae's breath caught. Just faintly. But his eyes didn't move from Joon's side profile.
Joon cleared his throat, shifting his grip on the wheel. He didn't look over.
"You make it feel like… like it's okay to be someone else. Not the guy who checks every word. Who walks around calculating everything. With you, I'm just… me."
His voice faltered slightly, barely noticeable, but enough to betray how hard it was for him to say this.
"I laugh. I say stupid shit. I act stupid. I let my guard down so much I forget I even had one."
Tae's hand slowly dropped from his mouth, resting on his lap. He stared at Joon's flushed ears, how he looked more nervous now than when they were naked hours ago.
"And maybe that's selfish," Joon added. "Because you deserve more than just… someone who escapes to you. But when I'm with you, I don't want to escape. I want to stay."
Tae's heart kicked. Hard.
The words settled thick and heavy between them, warming the car in a way no heater could.
Joon let out a quiet, breathy laugh. "Shit. This sounds so.. dramatic. I didn't mean it like that."
Tae didn't say anything.
He was too busy staring at him. Eyes wide, lips parted, chest slowly rising and falling like he couldn't quite breathe.
Joon glanced over, finally and his cheeks were tinged pink, ears red, brows drawn like he regretted every word and wanted to backpedal but couldn't.
"What I mean is…" he rushed out, voice stumbling a little. "I care. More than I should. About you. And not in some casual way. This isn't just fun for me, Tae. You make me—"
He cut himself off, teeth clenching, eyes fixed on the road again. "You make me feel things I shouldn't. Things I've never felt before. Fuck.. Not even with—" he stopped, shook his head. "Forget it."
But it was too late.
Tae's hand, slow and gentle, crept toward Joon's armrest. His fingers brushed lightly against Joon's.
Joon didn't pull away.
Tae swallowed hard.
"Joon," he whispered.
Joon's jaw flexed.
"…Yeah?"
But Tae couldn't speak. Not yet. His chest felt too full, his eyes wide with a hundred unspoken things and all he could do was look at the man beside him, the one who always looked so composed but now was fumbling, vulnerable, beautiful in his quiet chaos.
And just like that, Joon smiled. Small, crooked, almost shy.
He glanced sideways again.
"…Don't look at me like that. I'll crash the damn car."
Tae laughed, choked and breathy. His hand squeezed Joon's fingers.
The silence that followed wasn't heavy anymore.
It was full.