Elena stood there in the doorway, staring at them like she was trying to figure out if she'd walked into the right house. Her red hair was still done up all fancy from work, and she had that look on her face—the one she got when she caught Luna trying to sneak cookies before dinner.
"Well," she said again, dropping her purse with a loud thunk, "someone is trying to get a head start."
Hearing her words, Phoenix wanted to crawl under the sofa and die. His hand was still stuck to Diana's boob like it had been superglued there, and his brain had refused to work and apparently decided to take a vacation right when he needed it most.
Diana, meanwhile, looked like she was having the time of her life. She stretched her body lazily like a cat and didn't even bother closing her robe. "Just showing Phoenix here what he's been missing, staring at them the whole time through training. Kid was practically drooling during training."
"I wasn't drooling!" Phoenix squeaked, finally managing to yank his hand back from that ball of softness.
Elena walked over and planted a kiss on top of his head, her perfume mixing with the smell of her natural scent. "Relax, sweetie. I am not mad at you; in fact, I am happy that you are finally interested in this. Diana's idea of education has always been more..... hands-on."
"Speaking of education," Diana said, finally sitting up properly but still not bothering to cover anything, "we need to talk. Phoenix picked his cultivation path."
Elena plopped down in her chair and kicked off her heels with a sigh. "Oh yeah? What'd you choose, honey?"
"Body cultivation," Diana answered before Phoenix could open his mouth.
Elena's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Body cultivation? Really? Phoenix, sweetheart, magic is so much easier. Less chance of accidentally breaking your own bones, for one thing. Most guys your age take one look at a fireball spell and never look back. You do know it is going to be incredibly painful, right?"
Phoenix shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He did not know how to tell her he got the best technique from the system without fumbling it. "Well, I have a good reason?"
Diana snorted. "Kid had a very solid reason for it, apparently." She grabbed her holo pad and chucked it at Elena, who caught it without even looking. "Check out what technique he is going to be using."
Hearing her words, Elena opened the pad and started reading. Phoenix watched her face go through about five different expressions in ten seconds. Her mouth kept getting wider until she looked like she was trying to catch flies.
"Holy shit, Diana, where did you get this?" she said, scrolling back through the pages. "This technique is unlike anything I have ever seen. I mean, seriously insane. The energy channels and energy gathering method are much more different than anything I have seen in my life."
Diana grinned like she'd just won the lottery. "I did not get it, our dear little boy Phoenix did. Go on, kid. Tell her about your magical dream, Grandpa. Or your different memory."
Phoenix felt his ears burning. "Well, it's kinda really stupid....."
"I've heard stupider," Elena said, not taking her eyes off the screen.
"I had this weird dream about this old guy who said he'd been flying around the galaxy looking for someone to teach his super-secret technique to, and he picked me because..... I don't know, he liked my face or something?" Phoenix's voice got smaller with each word. "And he said it was the strongest technique in the universe."
Elena finally looked up. "A dream grandpa."
"Right?" Diana burst out laughing. "Kid comes downstairs this morning, talking about some cosmic hobo who decided to make him the chosen one. Another theory he had was that he got memories of someone from the prehistoric era, where women still existed. I really wanted to call the local psych ward until I read the actual technique."
"You tested it already?" Elena's voice got that sharp edge it got when she was switching into work mode.
"This morning. The kid went from complete beginner to Spark-class in one session. No weird side effects, no spiritual backlash, no mysterious voices telling him to burn things down. Whatever this thing is, it works." Diana's smile faded a bit. "But here's the problem—it's all physical enhancement. My thing is blowing stuff up with magic, not teaching people how to punch harder. You're the martial arts expert."
Elena set the pad down and stared at Phoenix like she was seeing him for the first time. "You want me to train you?"
Phoenix nodded, suddenly feeling about twelve years old. "If that's okay?"
A grin slowly spread across Elena's face, the kind that usually meant someone was about to have either a really good time or a really bad time. "Okay? Phoenix, honey, if this technique is even half as good as it looks, you might be sitting on the kind of power that could get you into any university in the galaxy." She got up and walked over, putting her hands on his shoulders. "We'll start first thing tomorrow. And don't worry—I won't make you smell like a garbage truck."
"That was necessary!" Diana protested. "Impurity expulsion is supposed to stink!"
"You could have warned him!"
"Where's the fun in that?"
Phoenix couldn't help grinning as his two moms started bickering like kids. Whatever weird stuff was happening in his life, at least he had people who cared enough to argue about the best way to help him not die during training.
"So," Elena said, turning back to him with that scary smile still on her face, "ready to see what real martial arts training looks like? Because, honey, Diana might be tough, but I'm the one who taught her how to fight."
Diana made a face. "You did not."
"Did too."
"That was one time, and you cheated."
"Using your opponent's overconfidence against them isn't cheating, it's strategy."
Phoenix settled back to watch them argue, figuring he might as well enjoy the calm before Elena inevitably tried to kill him with exercise tomorrow.