"No. Absolutely not."
After Morin showed them the Gokuraku Jodo dance music along with the female choreography, Optimus Prime shook his head repeatedly. He shook it so hard that, if his head weren't firmly bolted on, one might have worried it would fly off.
"I will never agree to perform this dance."
Aside from Ratchet, the other Autobots all looked at Morin with troubled expressions, silently hoping he would change his mind.
If they were mindless, soulless artificial intelligences, maybe they would have complied without hesitation. But they weren't.
They were flesh and blood-well, metal and oil-Transformers.
Each of them had their own personality.
How could a group of grown men perform a dance like this... and have it recorded on video?
And in front of so many familiar faces, no less.
"Why not? I think the dance looks quite beautiful," Ratchet said casually.
"You're a woman," Optimus shot back.
"And what does being a woman have to do with it? What does being a man have to do with it?" Ratchet tilted her head back.
For a brief moment, Optimus felt as though some terrifying, interstellar "feminist" boxing technique was about to descend upon him. Afraid he'd be taken out in a single blow, he immediately shook his head.
"Nothing. I just meant... I personally find it a bit hard to accept."
He turned to Morin, and his metallic face somehow managed to show visible distress.
"Could you consider changing it to something else?"
"No, no. That would make the video boring," Morin said, shaking his head. "Besides, this is a very fair trade."
"Think about it. Every Autobot gets a flight mode. Your overall combat power skyrockets. You could even ambush your arch-enemies, the Decepticons. The tactical value would be unprecedented."
"And all of that, in exchange for a little bit of pride."
"Just treat it as a flexibility test. Alright?"
"Our joints are transformable. There is no such thing as 'flexibility' for us," Optimus replied stiffly.
"That's just an excuse," Morin waved a hand. "There's no need to be so literal. If someone is too rigid, they miss out on a lot of things. Humans or Autobots."
"Y-Yeah... it's just a dance..." Bumblebee started to chime in from the side.
He was instantly silenced by the collective glares of the other Autobots.
You already got upgraded without paying the price, and now you're running your mouth?
Are you asking to be beaten?
If Optimus weren't standing right there, Ironhide and Jazz might have jumped Bumblebee on the spot.
"How about this," Optimus said, forcing himself to stay calm. "I won't dance. Let them do it instead."
"The upgrade only goes to those who dance," Morin replied, smiling.
To Optimus, that smile looked demonic.
"Then what about this?" Optimus suddenly had a flash of inspiration. "He didn't dance earlier, but you upgraded him anyway. Make him make up for it now, and give his extra upgrade slot to me."
He pointed directly at Bumblebee, who was currently gloating and desperately trying not to laugh.
Bumblebee: "!!!"
I've fought for the Autobots! I've been injured! You can't do this to me!
"You're right," Morin said, nodding.
Optimus felt a surge of joy.
"Bumblebee definitely needs to make up for it," Morin continued. "But since he's just making up for his previous turn, where does this 'extra' opportunity come from?"
Morin smiled again.
"So let's just have all the Autobots dance together."
Trying to play word games with me?
You Autobots are still too green.
"I absolutely cannot agree to these terms!" Optimus said firmly. "If they want to do it, they can!"
As the leader of the Autobots and the sworn enemy of the Decepticons, if he performed a dance like that-and worse, had it uploaded to the internet-how could he face the consequences?
Even if he could never fly again, he wouldn't accept it.
"I can add some weapons for you," Morin said. "High-firepower ones."
Optimus didn't move.
"I can modify you into the fastest jet model. Faster than Megatron, for sure."
Optimus's metallic brow twitched.
"I can even provide combat assistance. The very powerful kind."
"Really?" Optimus turned around instantly.
"Really. Isn't that what you want?" Morin nodded.
He didn't feel extorted in the slightest. To him, these things were trivial. If Optimus wanted them as part of the deal, he'd give them.
"All the previous terms are included?" Optimus asked.
He could tell Morin saw right through his act.
Morin simply didn't care.
"Yes. Everything," Morin said. "Do I look like someone who breaks his word?"
"There's no need for that."
"Then... I agree," Optimus said, nodding.
In his mind, he was already explaining it to himself.
This was for the future of the Autobots.
To keep the AllSpark out of enemy hands.
And to... test joint sensitivity.
He used every excuse he could, desperately trying to convince himself that he wasn't selling his body for profit.
I am noble.
Meanwhile, Bumblebee was already planning an escape.
Dancing?
That kind of dance?
Impossible.
Even if he was considered the "cute" one-if he were human, probably the gentle, submissive type-he would never submit to something like this.
Then he noticed the other Autobots surrounding him, wearing malicious grins and blocking every possible exit.
Optimus even declared that if Bumblebee ran, his Autobot status would be revoked.
Even knowing it was a joke, Bumblebee didn't dare move.
Then came the official dance time.
Under Morin's guidance, the Autobots lined up into formation.
There was no need to teach them the moves.
For Transformers, all it took was referencing the dance video, analyzing the data, and letting their bodies execute the commands.
Their bodies would never disobey.
And so, very quickly-
"Tsukiakari noboru koro..."
The music of Gokuraku Jodo echoed across the empty plains.
With their top-tier hardware, the Transformers reproduced every movement perfectly.
Their aggressive, imposing appearances clashed violently with the delicate choreography.
The contrast was flawless.
In short-
It was legendary.
After the dance, Ratchet was the only one who looked fine. She even walked over to Morin and asked him to send her a copy so she could admire it later.
The others reacted very differently.
They moved in perfect sync, covering their faces and crouching down, as if they wanted to sink into the ground and flee to another planet.
Should I make them dance to "LUVORATORRRRY!" next?
Morin rubbed his chin and thought about it.