Batman stood silently, watching as Colin carried Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy away into the night. Their silhouettes grew smaller and smaller against the city lights until they vanished completely.
"I just hope they don't come back anytime soon," he muttered.
To be honest, both Harley and Ivy were troublemakers—especially Ivy. Dealing with her was like handling a living forest fire.
Beside him, Clark said calmly, "They won't. Not until they finish Colin's task."
After a few more words of idle chat, Clark flew off. When he returned home, Lois Lane was sitting at the dining table, scribbling furiously on her notepad.
"You want something to drink?" he asked.
"Mm… yeah, grab me a beer," Lois replied absently, her pen still moving. She'd been racking her brain for hours, trying to come up with a title catchy enough to dominate the headlines.
Clark returned with two beers, setting one in front of her before sinking into a chair.
"Colin saved someone tonight," he said, cracking open the bottle.
"Oh?" Lois looked up. "Tell me about it. If it's a good story, I might be able to use it." She took a sip, the cool beer cutting through her mental fog.
Clark recounted everything Colin had done that evening.
When he finished, Lois leaned back, eyes thoughtful. "Maybe I should interview the man he helped. It'd be a great piece—spreading kindness while also…" She smirked. "You know how it goes. Anything that paints Colin in a good light gets boosted by Big Twitter. We could make a fortune off this."
She didn't mind doing something good, especially when it came with a paycheck. But the truth was, Colin had been bleeding her dry lately—charging absurd amounts just for photo rights.
Why did she have to pay so much when no one else did? That bastard was clearly targeting her.
Clark chuckled. "We could also do a feature on Harley and Ivy's new lives—how they're replanting trees. Maybe even make it a running column."
Lois perked up. It was a tempting idea. Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy—two infamous criminals—redeeming themselves by planting trees? That would explode online. But… would Colin even allow it?
"You think he'd agree to that?" she asked skeptically.
Clark thought for a moment. "Easily. Give him seventy percent of the column's profits and volunteer some help for the planting. I doubt he'd say no."
Lois gave him a long look. "You're unusually clever today, Clark."
He grinned sheepishly.
"Well… fine. Even thirty percent would still be a goldmine." Lois nodded.
Meanwhile, under the blistering sun of a vast desert, Harley Quinn stared blankly at the endless expanse of sand.
"You sure we're supposed to plant this much?" she groaned.
Poison Ivy, on the other hand, looked perfectly at ease. For her, any place that could host greenery was paradise. People annoyed her—plants didn't. This place might just become her sanctuary.
Colin glanced at Harley. She caught his eye and quickly dropped her pout, leaning forward playfully with a mischievous grin.
"I mean, I look pretty good, right? Maybe I could… keep your bed warm tonight? In exchange for lighter work?"
Ivy sighed. "Harley, trust me—Colin doesn't think much about women."
"Huh!? What kind of guy isn't into women?" Harley blurted out in disbelief.
Ivy looked at Colin, who raised a brow. "You tell her," his expression seemed to say.
Then, with a flicker of power, he shared his vision with Harley.
At first, she was confused. Then horrified.
"WHAT THE—?! Ivy! There's—bugs—all over your face! Ew! That's disgusting!" Harley yelped, jumping back like a cat on fire.
Now she understood. In Colin's eyes, the human body—especially women—looked like something grotesque, crawling with unseen life.
"Okay, okay! Enough! I've seen way too much!" she shrieked.
Colin broke the connection and said coolly, "I can control my perception now, but once you've seen it… it's hard to forget."
Harley shuddered, nodding. "Yeah… no kidding. I think I'll stay single for a while."
The mental image lingered unpleasantly in her head.
Ivy ignored her and, using her power, shaped a small house made of vines and petals. "We'll need some supplies," she said simply.
"Yeah," Harley agreed. "I need clean clothes, sunscreen, makeup, personal stuff, tools—basically, a lot."
Colin thought for a moment. "Alright. I'll take you both shopping."
He teleported them to a nearby city, stopping outside a large mall. Handing them a sleek black card, he said, "Buy whatever you need."
Harley grinned wickedly. "Oh, we don't need your card. We can just rob the place!"
Colin: "…"
He just stared at her—those calm, brown eyes deep as still water. Under that gaze, Harley's confidence evaporated.
She quickly took the card, laughing nervously. "Kidding! Totally kidding! C'mon, Ivy—shopping spree!"
She grabbed Ivy's arm and dragged her inside.
Colin turned away, satisfied. They'd probably be gone for hours. Plenty of time for him to amuse himself elsewhere.
Inside, Harley held up the card. "You think there's a lot on this?"
"Probably," Ivy replied. "He doesn't strike me as the type to worry about money."
Harley was so tempted to max it out—but one glance at Colin's memory of crushing a god's skull made her decide otherwise. Dying over retail therapy didn't sound worth it.
Ivy grabbed a shopping cart, and Harley immediately jumped inside, letting Ivy push her down the aisle.
Heads turned—mostly because Harley Quinn was impossible to miss—but one by one, people quickly looked away. Everyone in Gotham knew her reputation. Nobody wanted trouble.
Ivy didn't care. In fact, the emptier the store became, the more peaceful she felt.
"Hey, Ivy," Harley said, tilting her head. "What kinda guy do you think Colin really is?"
"A reasonable one," Ivy replied after a pause. "As long as your requests aren't too ridiculous, he'll usually listen."
"Reasonable, huh?" Harley leaned back in the cart, smirking. "Guess that's rare for a god."