My greatest weakness.
Math…..
I slid my hand under the desk, reaching for my math book and a separate notebook to write notes.
Not like I'm gonna write anything.
Just something to keep the act.
I could doodle…Or…
Write a poem…?
A small, exhausted breath slips out of me.
My eyes are heavy—like weights pulling them down.
My body rocks forward and back, no control left in it.
I'm tired.
Really fucking tired.
I missed a couple days.
And I know the teacher probably hates me for it.
My eyes drift to her writing math problems on the chalkboard.
"Okay, so now blah blah blah…"
She's saying actual words, but all I hear is blah blah blah.
My head rests on my hand as I watch the problems stack up like some boring movie.
My stomach gurgles.
…
Didn't eat anything last night.
Kinda hungry.
Hopefully nobody heard that.
Ring.
Everyone Stands, and leaves
A scraping sound pulls my gaze to the side.
Kurozawa stands—quick, stiff—like something shocked her upright.
A stare.
Her eyes crash into mine.
My heart lurches and I'm forced to drop my gaze.
She grunts under her breath… then walks away.
My eyes follow her out, her steps controlled, dangerous—
like she's barely holding herself back from killing someone.
I sink back in my chair, my own shoulders tightening, trying to shake off the tension she left behind.
Finally lunch.
been counting time by the second.
My ass hurts.
I stand from my seat and brush my backside off.
A little pat helps the pain go away.
My hands go back again to pat my backside.
…
That's better.
Now—
Lunch time-
…
My heartbeat tightened, like fingers closing around it… urging me to remember something I shouldn't ever forget.
Shit..
Is it okay…to avoid her?
Why the fuck should that matter?
She almost killed me.
Right…?
An annoyed sound slips out of me as a headache blooms behind my eyes.
"This is not the time to question yourself," I mutter under my breath, one hand gripping the side of my head.
I creep out the classroom door and peek down the hallway.
...
No one but the occasional students walking around.
None look like Mina.
My breath relaxes.
Good.
She's not after me.
Not today.
Why…?
I walk out into the hallway and make my way downstairs to the cafeteria.
When my eyes reach the cafeteria entrance—
Still no Mina.
Strange…
A wrong feeling hits my chest.
A weird picking at me—like my body knows something's off.
Telling me something I don't want to confront.
Not after what I said to her.
My mind plays yesterday's moments on a loop—
the snap of my voice, the way she hung up, the guilt that hit after.
But there's something under it, crawling in my chest.
Something I don't have a name for yet.
…
I step into the cafeteria.Stand on line as usual.
My eyes dart around.
She's nowhere to be found.No seat.No shadow.No purple hair.
…
Did she even go to class today?
My mind goes back to her wrist.The way it looked.Like someone dragged a knife deep into her skin.
My body cringes.
What the fuck is she doing to herself?
"All for you."
She said that to me.
That she did it for love….
…
"Love"
What does that even mean…
…
I step forward.
It's my turn.
I grab a tray and the same curry rice with veggies.
I walk off the line…
Where should I eat?
My eyes dart around.The benches are packed today.Mostly girls sitting with girls.
How inconvenient.
Maybe I'll eat on the rooftop—
But the idea hits something raw inside me. My chest tightens. My stomach twists.
No.
Mina… she could be—
Not okay.
My hand trembles a little as I adjust my grip on the tray.
I'll just…
eat outside.
I slip out of the cafeteria and take a seat on a small bench near the track field. A few students are out there—practicing under the open sky.
My spoon sinks through the curry, scoops up rice, then veggies.
Eating alone on this bench…
It feels nice—
Ring.
The sudden chime snaps through me.
…Guess that means class.
I walked back into the cafeteria, placed my tray by the trash, and headed upstairs.
Slide.
I pushed through the door and sat in my usual seat.
School ended.
Ring.
School's over.
I exhale.
"Finally out of this shit hole."
Students rush out.
My eyes slide to the seat next to me—empty.
Her desk is spotless.
Kurozawa's gone.
Probably working a shift.
I pack my things, swap my shoes, and head out.
I'm heading toward the school gates, still a little ways off.
"Hey, Sayo!"
A voice rings out ahead of me.
My eyes snap up.
My stomach twists instantly.
A voice I… somehow forgot.
Mina.
She's already at the gates—standing there, waving.
But not at me.
Then—
A strong hit of cologne drifts across the path.
A guy approaches the gate from the far right, like he's meeting her.
Black hair.
Green eyes.
Glasses.
I only catch a glimpse, but it's enough.
My heart slams hard. His face is sharp, clean—almost unreal—
the kind of guy girls stare at once and fall for.
He's… better.
Better than me.
In every way.
A tight, ugly feeling crawls up from my stomach into my chest.
I glance at Mina again.
She's—
My hand rises to my heart before I notice. My legs stopping in place
She's smiling.
"Hey… Mina, come — I'll walk you home," he says as he approaches her.
His voice is low… trying way too hard to sound seductive or masculine or whatever.
I stand there, stuck—
glued to the ground.
A battle inside me, one instinct fighting the other, ripping me in two.
She hasn't noticed m—
Her eyes snap to me.
My heart screams out of my chest.
A startled look—
then it melts back into a soft smile—
she turns.
And follows the boy.
…
I hear nothing else.
Only the beating of my heart
My feet move.
Out the entrance.
Somewhere.
Anywhere but here.
My body pushes open a door—
A wave of coffee scent hits my nose.
I look up.
The café me and Mina went to—
My eyes drop again as I walk toward a booth.
I slide in, place my bag beside me, and just… sit.
Staring at the empty seat across from me.
I…
"I…"
The word loops in my head, over and over.
I can't process what I saw.
What I feel right now.
My throat tightens.
Tears begin to well in my eyes–
"Hey."
"HEY!"
The world snaps.
I stare left.
Kurozawa.
She's standing there—
worried.
"Why are you… being so weird?" she asks, annoyed, her uniform slightly wrinkled.
"You're just sitting here… staring like a weirdo. Sulking. What, you want someone to feel bad for you?"
…
My mouth doesn't move.
Not even a twitch.
She lets out a tired sigh and slides into the seat beside me, her elbow on the table, her cheek resting against her hand.
"Haru," she says.
And everything just—
hangs.