I saw her lying beside me on the cliff—my mother.As casually as if she hadn't died long ago.
Her pitch-black eyes, identical to the damned sea.Her dirty, tangled blonde hair.Her tall, elegant posture.
I couldn't move.Not after the shapeless room.Not after Adam.
Peace.That was all I wanted.
So I ignored the ghosts crawling behind me and stared up at the sky.Once, stars filled it—cold, distant, indifferent.Now it was a fetched-black void swallowing the crimson moon of the underworld whole.
While I watched that dead sky, her voice broke the silence.
"So you're not going to talk to your mother, Sammail?"
I stared at the ground.Adam's blood dripped beside my feet, steady and slow, like a broken clock.
"Whatever you are," I muttered, "I'm not interested anymore. I don't care if you're really my mother or not."I shifted my gaze to her ghost."And if you are… then stay dead. Leave me alone."
She smiled—a brittle, dying thing.
"I'm only a projection of your mind, Sammail. You chose this cliff. You chose to see me. Though…"She paused."I'm not only an illusion. But call me that for now."
My mind sure knew how to torture me.I had to give it that.
I picked up a cigarette soaked in Adam's blood. I lit it.The moment I inhaled, my throat seized, and I vomited blood onto the dirt.
Why?I killed him.It's done.Vomiting or crying won't bring him back.
My mother's ghost watched me with pity—a pity I didn't deserve.
"Smoking isn't your thing, Sammail. Look at yourself."
I snorted."Neither is being a fallen human. But here I am. Thanks to the woman who wanted to die so badly she created a vessel to suffer in her place."
She lit her own cigarette—somehow—and handed it to me.Her fingers brushed mine. Warm. Present. Real.
But wrong.So very wrong.
I inhaled deeply and stared into her pitch-black eyes, searching the way Jester taught me.And I saw it—shards of a soul clinging desperately to someone.
I wanted to believe that someone was me.But I wasn't that lucky.
"What are you really?" I asked quietly, handing it back.
She smiled faintly.
"When I died, my soul stayed near you. I didn't know why. My sins died with me—you inherited them. Yet I couldn't vanish or rest. I just watched. Hoping one day I'd fade on my own… without ever touching your life again."
I laughed—sharp and hollow.
"So the former Sin of Corruption did feel something. Who would've thought?"My grin twisted."You let my father rape me. Beat me. Treat me like a rotting dog. And when I finally got the courage to kill myself, I became a fallen human—Lucifer and Jester's puppet. So tell me, Mother… was it worth it?"
I inhaled again.
She laughed bitterly.
"Sammail… I can't feel guilt or empathy. Everything you said is true. I used your existence as a loop to end myself. And it wasn't worth it. I'm not alive or dead. Just a hollow thing your screaming mind forced to appear."She looked straight at me."So tell me—do you still feel anything toward me?"
The cigarette was almost dead.Like us.
I gave her an empty smile.
"I don't know. You heard my answer at the Black Tower. Let me make it simple: I don't care if what we had was a lie. Because at the time, you fooled me. And I was happy."I paused."So tell me now—why did you want to die so badly? And how did you break your contract?"
Shame flickered across her face.
"When you live thousands of years inflicting pain, you begin to yearn for the peace only death offers."She looked up with a cold, terrifying smile."And if you want to die that badly, Sammail… you'll have to seek that answer yourself."
I dropped the cigarette and crushed it.
Then I looked at her with murder in my eyes.
"So. How do I make you disappear completely?"
A wicked smile curved her lips.
"So you figured it out. Then you know what you must do."She leaned forward."You have to eat me, Sammail."
I smiled back.
"What you want… is what I want."
My eyes bled black and red.Horns crawled from my skull.Claws ripped through my skin.
I threw her down and sank my teeth into her neck.
She didn't scream.She stroked my hair—gentle, familiar—like she did when I cried under that old park tree.
"You are not hideous, Sammail," she whispered. "You are as beautiful as the dark sky."
Her tears hit my cheek.
"I only felt alive when I watched you."
My heart cracked.I wanted to stop.I wanted to cry.I wanted anything except this—
But I wanted her dead more.
Right before she dissolved, she whispered:
"Be careful of the Jester."
Then she vanished inside me.
Something ancient stirred in my chest.
I looked at my reflection in the blood.
My hair was half white.
"I hope you weren't lying," I murmured."Because I think I look hideous."