Baiyuan had always been a good friend of Gaojia Village, so Shansier naturally wouldn't refuse him. He quickly escorted Madam Bai, the young master, and their attendants into the fortress and instructed Adviser Tan Liwen to arrange rooms and daily necessities for them.
Baiyuan cupped his fists. "My thanks to Dao Xuan Tianzun and to you, Steward Shan. With my wife and child safe here, I have no worries left. I'll return to Baijia Fort immediately, gather the militia, and prepare to resist the bandits."
Shansier frowned. "A few thousand bandits… even if Baijia Fort starts performing miracles, you can't hold out. This ultimately relies on the government."
Baiyuan sighed. "The government… you know the situation. Chengcheng County only has Inspector Cheng Xu with barely over a hundred soldiers. He's fine for catching petty thieves. But against thousands of bandits? He might as well go visit his ancestor in the afterlife."
Shansier: "…"
Baiyuan continued, "Anyway, I must return. If Baijia Fort can't hold, I'll flee here. I hope Gaojia Village will save me again when that time comes."
Shansier saluted him solemnly. "Take care. If the situation turns bad, come immediately."
Baiyuan climbed into his carriage, cracked the reins, and sped back the way he came. The attendants followed, a whole group arriving fast and leaving even faster—vanishing into the sunset in moments.
Li Daoxuan watched him go, a twinge of worry in his heart.
Baiyuan was such a lovable troublemaker. After watching him from the heavens for so long, Li Daoxuan had developed a strange fondness for him. It was like watching a comedian perform for years—then suddenly hearing this comedian plans to fight a hundred armed thugs bare-handed. You'd worry too.
Looks like it was time to deploy… the Solar Vehicle No. 3.
"Yiye! Hey, Yiye! Go call Gao Chuwu and Zheng Daniu over."
Gao Yiye immediately ran off, officially assuming the role of "messenger captain."
Li Daoxuan lowered the newly modified Solar Vehicle No. 3 before the two men.
The massive vehicle—fourteen centimeters long in their scale (which was twenty-eight meters in the real world)—stood before two tiny warriors shorter than a centimeter. The visual impact was explosive.
Gao Chuwu and Zheng Daniu craned their necks, mouths hanging open. "It's THIS big?"
Li Daoxuan replied, "If it isn't big enough, it can't carry the trebuchets."
Both men blinked. "Huh? Why carry trebuchets?"
Bonk. Bonk.
Shansier flicked each of them on the forehead. "Still don't get it? Tianzun wants you two to drive this giant cart and deliver trebuchets to Baijia Fort to help Mister Bai defend against the bandits!"
The two finally understood.
"Tomorrow at sunrise, familiarize yourselves with this vehicle. Driving is the same as before, but because it's larger, the inertia is greater. Turning is harder. Move slowly."
At dawn the next day, the two idiots began training. Though dim-witted, their bodies were nimble and their reflexes sharp—surprisingly suited for driving. After one day, they were already proficient.
On the third morning, Li Daoxuan loaded the mini-trebuchets—the same ones used against Wu Shang Mingwang—onto the vehicle. Each was only three centimeters long, and several could be stacked easily. The only issue was that Baiyuan might struggle unloading them, but Li Daoxuan believed in the ingenuity of ancient laborers. They would figure it out.
Gao Chuwu and Zheng Daniu set off, hauling a fully loaded cart of trebuchets toward Baijia Fort, more than forty li away.
The vehicle was enormous, making the official road feel narrow. The wheels frequently rolled onto the roadside grass. Fortunately, the wheels were sturdy. As long as they moved slowly and avoided deep pits and big stones, they progressed steadily.
…
Meanwhile, Inspector Cheng Xu of the Ninth Rank was marching with his hundred-plus soldiers toward Huanglong Mountain.
"Damn it!" Cheng Xu cursed nonstop. "I finally wiped out all the local bandits of Chengcheng County—worked my ass off! And suddenly, bandits from other counties pop up again! Damn it, damn it, damn their ancestors! Luo Chuan County Magistrate! Yi Chuan County Magistrate! I curse your eighteen generations!"
The deputy inspector whispered, "Boss… shouldn't we curse the inspectors of Luo Chuan and Yi Chuan instead? They failed to eliminate their local bandits."
Cheng Xu snorted. "Those inspectors are military officials like me. I understand their pain! The bandits are too many. They only have around a hundred men like I do—how can they resist? It's not their fault. It's the civil officials with their brutal taxes that forced the people to rebel. We military men are innocent."
The soldiers exchanged glances.
Something felt wrong… but also strangely correct.
The deputy asked softly, "Boss, once we reach Huanglong Mountain… attack immediately?"
"Attack your ass!" Cheng Xu snapped. "Haven't you heard? Luo Chuan's bandits—two to three thousand. Yi Chuan's bandits—two to three thousand. Together at least five thousand! And you want our hundred to charge uphill? You trying to die early? Once we reach the mountain foot, I'm not climbing a single step. I'll go inside Baijia Fort, drink tea, and freeload. If the bandits retreat, we return and report our 'victory'—that we drove off five thousand with a hundred men. If the bandits attack…"
The deputy finished, "We run? And report that 'the enemy was overwhelming—retreat was not a crime.'"
Cheng Xu patted his helmet. "You're finally learning."
Soon, Baijia Fort came into view.
Cheng Xu squinted. "Oh? They thickened and raised the walls. Looks like someone spent money recently."
The gates opened, and Baiyuan stepped out, greeting him warmly. "General Cheng, your presence brings glory to Baijia Fort."
Cheng Xu laughed. "Mister Bai, you know exactly why I'm here."
"Of course—it's for Huanglong Mountain."
Both turned to look at the towering mountain to the north—massive, twisting, majestic. From where they stood, they could only see a corner of it.
Cheng Xu said, "Thousands of bandits are right on that mountain beside you, yet you calmly remain here. That courage is rare."
Baiyuan gave a helpless smile. "The common folk of dozens of li around rely on me. How could I flee the moment bandits appear? That would violate propriety. And propriety, as you know, is one of the Six Arts of a gentleman. I take it very seriously."
Footnotes
① Fun Fact — "The Exit Speed of Baiyuan's Family"
Their arrival-to-departure ratio is basically the ancient version of "drop kids at grandma's and sprint back to the battlefield."
② Fun Fact — "Mini Giants"
To the tiny villagers, the fourteen-centimeter Solar Vehicle is equivalent to a modern person standing under a forty-foot semi-truck.
③ Fun Fact — "Trebuchet Delivery Service"
Gao Chuwu and Zheng Daniu have now become the world's first express logistics drivers for medieval artillery.
④ Fun Fact — "Inspector Cheng's Logic"
His worldview:
Civil officials = always guilty
Military officials = never guilty
Bandits = someone else's fault
⑤ History Note — County Forces
Late-Ming county-level military units often had only 100–200 men. Many counties couldn't handle even medium-sized bandit groups.
⑥ History Note — Brutal Tax Collection
Harsh tax policies and grain levies did push peasants into rebellion. Many uprisings in the Ming era began with tax resistance.
⑦ History Note — Militia Forts
Private forts like Baijia Fort were common in troubled regions. Local gentry funded walls, hired guards, and protected surrounding villages.