As the warm water from the shower ran over Yibo's body, his mind drifted back to a question Duan had once asked him, a long time ago.
"Why aren't you interested in women, Yibo?"
At the time, he hadn't known how to answer. He truly didn't have one. Duan had asked about something Yibo himself had never consciously examined....something his heart and mind had never clearly identified or carried far enough to define.
If there was anything he could recall, it was an incident from years ago during their school days. They were in an advanced recitation class at the time, preparing for a major assessment. A girl named Zhi had been selected to compete alongside him. Yibo was in the top group, while A Bo was in the regular class, but when it came time for evaluations, everyone was tested together. Still, their seating and routines remained separate from the others.
Yibo had grown used to always being the best. No one ever outperformed him, and even the teachers openly acknowledged it. During morning reviews, he could complete his entire portion before anyone else. At first, his classmates resented him, but eventually they gave up trying to compete.
Then Zhi arrived.
She was stubborn....determined, by any means, to surpass him. She pushed herself relentlessly, to the point that even the teacher praised her in front of the class, joking that she had finally beaten Yibo.
When Yibo told A Bo about it, A Bo suggested they corner her and scare her a little, maybe rough her up enough to make her back off. Yibo refused....until the day Zhi calmly recited three full sections flawlessly in front of the teachers, including parts that hadn't even been assigned. The school held a small assembly for her afterward and gave her awards and books.
That day, even A Bo lost his temper.
After school, A Bo, Yibo, and two of A Bo's friends....Lalo and Karaye....followed her. In a narrow alley few people used, especially during the rainy season because of the mud, they blocked her path. She was with a friend and her younger sibling. Lalo and Karaye sealed off both ends while A Bo shoved her against the wall and told Yibo to slap her first.
When Yibo stepped closer and saw her face....pale with fear, clutching the award she had just received because she hadn't had anywhere to put it....something inside him shifted. A sudden wave of pity washed over him.
He told A Bo to let her go. That he was done.
A Bo questioned him once, just to be sure. Then he released her. Lalo and Karaye protested, accusing Yibo of making them look foolish. Words turned heated, and before long, they were fighting A Bo instead. Yibo had to step in and break it up before everyone went their separate ways.
From that day on, whenever Yibo crossed paths with Zhi, he felt something strange stirring in his chest....especially when he noticed the fear in her eyes and how she went out of her way to avoid him. He found himself thinking about her often, even dreaming about her once. What troubled him most was that he didn't even understand what he was feeling, let alone how to explain it to A Bo.
Soon after their final exams, they all went their separate ways, and Yibo never saw her again. Whatever those feelings had been slowly faded, carried away by time.
In his entire life, that was the only moment he could recall when his heart had reacted that way toward a woman. That was why, when Duan asked him that question, he hadn't known what to say.
Since then, whenever he encountered women....at work, on the street, even on hospital beds where he saw people most often....Duan's question echoed in his mind.
At first glance, he would gather his thoughts, searching for something....anything. But all he ever found in their eyes was emptiness, like a hollow space with nothing inside except movement without meaning. Eventually, he stopped looking altogether.
The only thing he knew was that he finally had an answer ready, should Duan ever ask him again.
And that realization lingered with him as he stared at his reflection, water still clinging to his skin.
After stepping out of the shower, Yibo stood in front of the mirror, studying his reflection. His hair had grown longer than usual....proof of how much time this program was consuming. He hadn't expected things to turn out this way. At first, he'd agreed to the work out of obligation, remembering his professor's words about repaying a favor. He never imagined he would become so invested.
Lately, he'd even postponed entering surgery just to finish checking on patients in this department....something he once thought impossible. Back then, he'd believed it would take a battle just to interact comfortably with patients. Now, there was no corner he wouldn't step into, no detail he wouldn't chase, just to make sure nothing was wrong....no hidden discomfort, no unanswered question.
The workload was heavy....Yibo knew that well—especially the reports Zhan handled. Zhan was diligent; Yibo wouldn't hesitate to rate him at around eighty percent. Beyond effort, Zhan had the confidence to do things properly, in a way that left no room for visible failure.
Lately, Yibo felt something new forming between himself, the patients, and Zhan, the intern he worked with every day. Zhan would arrive at his office with all the patients' updates before rounds, then trail behind him from bed to bed as he examined them. Sometimes Yibo would hand him something to hold, or take the tablet Zhan was writing on to check if the notes were accurate. Other times, he would stand close to him, watching the screen as Zhan explained, his slender fingers tracing line after line.
There had been something about Zhan that held Yibo's attention from the very first day.... the day Zhan walked into his office. At first, Yibo hadn't understood it. Only now, after working closely with him, did he realize it was Zhan's eyes. When Yibo looked into them, it felt as though they were filled with light, as if they closed the hollow emptiness he saw in everyone else.
Zhan's eyes seemed full.... overflowing with things Yibo couldn't even name. And often, there was fear in them, especially when Zhan looked at him or when he spoke to him. At times, that fear reminded him of Zhi, and that was why he found himself drawn to Zhan's eyes so often.... they stirred memories of Zhi and of what he had once felt back then.
The moment he truly realized this was during an incident at the far end of the male ward. Zhan was standing close, explaining a mistake they had nearly made with a patient....a wrong dosage that had been caught in time. Zhan had pulled up the patient's chart on the tablet, speaking quickly, his voice trembling slightly. Yibo wanted to determine whether the error had come from him, from Zhan's documentation, or from the nurses administering the medication.
As Zhan spoke faster, almost shaking, Yibo's attention drifted from the tablet to Zhan himself. He studied him closely....the way Zhan's eyes shimmered, framed by thin yet slightly broad brows that nearly met; the way he bit down on his lower lip as he spoke, right near the small mole there. It was obvious Zhan was flustered, and Yibo couldn't fully process what he was saying.
So he simply called his name.
Zhan looked up at once....and their eyes met.
In that instant, something stirred in Yibo's chest. The same familiar sensation he had felt years ago, long buried by time. The same feeling he'd once had for Zhi.
From that moment on, Yibo made a conscious effort to avoid looking at Zhan too much. He didn't know if he was ready to confront that nameless feeling again....something he still didn't understand. He reminded himself repeatedly that his relationship with Zhan was strictly professional. Nothing more. Nothing that involved his heart.
After getting dressed, Yibo stepped into the living room to see if there was anything he could eat before night fell. He'd already decided he had to get a haircut that day; otherwise, with how exhausted he'd been lately, proper sleep might not come easily.
When he opened the fridge, he remembered something Duan had said during his last visit before returning to Macau. Duan had come with good news, talking excitedly about visiting a girl's family and how well it had gone. He was already calculating timelines....how investigations would be completed, when families would be formally contacted....and swore he could be fully ready in just three months if needed.
In the middle of that conversation, Duan had opened the fridge, stared inside, and said,
"Yibo, what do you even eat to stay alive?"
Now, standing there alone, Yibo found himself asking the same question. What did he actually eat every day? Aside from rows of bottled water, the contents of the fridge were so few he could count them on two fingers.
He closed the fridge, went back to his room, grabbed his phone and car keys, and decided to head out immediately. He'd eat something on the way, then go straight to the barbershop....it wasn't close, after all.
That's exactly what he did. After stopping at a nearby restaurant for food, he went on to the barbershop. He spent a long time there....it was the weekend, the one day when everyone seemed to finally unload the weight of the week.
After getting his haircut and heading home, he found himself passing by the mall where he usually shopped. Since he already needed a few things, he decided to stop in.
When he finished shopping and looked at what he'd picked up, even he was surprised. He hadn't realized he had accumulated that many needs. As the cashier began totaling the items, he suddenly remembered that his perfumes were almost finished. So he turned back toward the aisle where the fragrances were displayed.
He rounded the corner....and froze.
Standing there were two people: a young man and a girl, laughing together. At first, he barely registered them. Then the girl turned toward him.
In that instant, the figure in front of him seemed to shift....until the girl became Zhan.
Yibo's gaze locked onto him as the image fully settled into the familiar Zhan he worked with every day. The only difference was that Zhan wasn't wearing the white uniform he was used to seeing.
Zhan's eyes widened at the same time, surprise flashing openly across his face, and his mouth parted as he blurted out,
"Sir!"
That was what made the young man beside him turn around and look as well.
Yibo stepped forward and extended his hand to the young man.
"My name is Yibo. I work with him."
"Oh.... oh, I see! Nice to meet you. How's work going?"
"Busy," Yibo replied briefly, his eyes drifting back to Zhan, who was now standing with a teenager who looked very much like him. Zhan's gaze was lowered as he spoke softly to the boy.
"That's good to hear."
The young man said this just as the teenager turned back from Zhan, clearly having been told who Yibo was, and greeted him politely.
The teenager's voice was calm.... much like Zhan's, the voice Yibo heard every day. Something about it made Yibo smile faintly as he responded, then his eyes returned to Zhan, who was now looking at him.
There were many emotions flickering in Zhan's eyes....too many for Yibo to clearly name.
Zhan opened his mouth, clearly about to say something, but Yibo spoke first. He gave a small smile, nodded once, and said,
"Have a nice weekend."
Then he turned away....without even buying the perfume that had brought him there in the first place.
When he returned to the counter where his items were nearly done being totaled, he felt something heavy settle deep in his chest.
Something he had never considered before. Something he had never thought about. JEALOUSY.
For the first time, it struck him clearly: there was a life beyond the hospital.
✨✨✨
In the hospital parking lot the next morning, Zhan stood off to the side as usual, dressed in his neatly pressed uniform, the clean white fabric almost glowing in the early light. He checked his watch again... he had been waiting nearly fifteen minutes for Aji, who had told him to wait so they could go in together.
Lowering his arm, he shifted slightly and watched a car pulling into the lot.
Aji had described her husband's car to him before, but since he wasn't particularly good at remembering details like that, he couldn't immediately tell if this was it. He kept watching as the car drew closer—and then he spotted Aji in the front seat, smiling when she saw him.
As the car stopped and he walked over, Aji handed him a food flask first thing.
"Sorry about the delay. No matter how much I asked him to hurry, he kept driving slowly."
From inside the car, her husband's voice followed easily,
"If it were just the two of us, nothing would stop me from speeding."
Zhan smiled, greeted him from where he stood, then turned and walked ahead as Aji closed the car door and joined him. After a brief goodbye, they headed toward the hospital entrance, chatting as they walked.
Suddenly, Zhan felt a dull heaviness in his chest.
He didn't know why, but since Saturday night, he'd felt off. What had happened at the mall refused to leave his mind. He knew he hadn't done anything wrong....yet seeing Yibo there had unsettled him deeply.
If he were being honest with himself, Yibo was the very last person his mind would ever have imagined seeing in that moment. If he expected to run into anyone, it wouldn't have been Yibo...., he hadn't seen Jincai in days. Their contact had been limited to phone calls, and even those he answered only when he felt like it.
And the way Yibo had looked at him then....paired with a smile Zhan didn't even understand the origin of....kept replaying in his thoughts.
Because as far as Zhan knew, Yibo was not someone who smiled easily.
Still, when he returned Bai's greeting, he smile at him too.
By the time they reached their office, work was already waiting in full force. It was Monday, and everything had piled up. Boxes of IV fluids and various medications were being brought in continuously. One of the male nurses had collected them from the pharmacy, and judging by the quantity, they wouldn't last beyond the next day. That was why they were being stacked temporarily in their office, the one closest to the wards.
Aji picked up her work materials and immediately went off to carry out the tasks listed in Dr. Yibo's Friday report....things that needed to be done before he arrived to see the patients. Zhan also began preparing. He followed Nurse Sale, with whom he now worked almost constantly, and together they organized a short briefing to present to Dr. Yibo.
They finished just before nine o'clock, despite working quickly. Zhan already knew by then that Dr. Yibo had arrived and was in his office. Holding two tablets under his arm, he headed there. The first tablet was the one Dr. Yibo had given him the day after telling him to stop using paper. The second belonged to the program, distributed the previous Thursday. Zhan had waited until today to return it because he had just finished compiling everything on it.
As always, Zhan knocked twice before opening the door. The cool air from the AC greeted him immediately.
His eyes barely took in the room before settling on Dr. Yibo.
Today, he was seated in one of the two chairs facing his desk....not the one he usually used. But that wasn't what made Zhan's heart pause. It was his appearance. Zhan had never seen him dressed casually before. He was wearing a plain white short-sleeved T-shirt that fit close to his body, paired with gray trousers. And beyond the clothes, there was something else....something different, something more.
Dr. Yibo's head was lowered as he focused on the laptop resting on his lap. He acknowledged the knock without looking up and returned Zhan's greeting the same way. No one would have guessed that this was the same man who had smiled at him just the day before.
Zhan forced himself to continue.
"Today's Monday briefing...."
"Zhan."
Dr. Yibo interrupted him, as he always did, calling him directly by name.
"Yes, sir," Zhan replied quietly.
Dr. Yibo lifted his head then and looked at him. That was when Zhan noticed the other change. Dr. Yibo's hair had been cut shorter....very short....and it somehow sharpened the natural authority in his face.
"I'll start patient rounds later," Dr. Yibo said. "As we go bed by bed, brief me on each patient."
Zhan nodded, understanding. He even thought it would be easier that way. At least it meant fewer trips to the office...and fewer moments of dealing with the strange sensation in his chest that he still hadn't learned to ignore.
"Open your email now," Dr. Yibo added. "I've sent you a message."
Zhan nodded again and powered on the tablet. His fingers moved to the email app, and sure enough, Dr. Yibo's message sat right at the top. He opened it and began to read.
Please handle the following, this week and over the weekend:
Discharge summaries for all surgical patients
Pre/post-op vitals comparison sheets
Wound progression reports
Antibiotic usage audit
Referral letters for follow-up care
Draft slides for the upcoming outcome review
Kindly ensure all are complete and ready for review by Monday morning. Reach out only for urgent clarifications.
Zhan read to the end, then went back to the beginning. Even so, he felt like he hadn't fully understood it. If he had, then this was no small task....there was no realistic way to complete all of this within a single week, on top of the workload already waiting for him. Unless every hour of the week was spent writing, with nothing else in between.
He looked up at Dr. Yibo.
Dr. Yibo had already returned his attention to the laptop, continuing his work as though nothing more needed to be said.
Zhan looked back at the email. This time, the first line stood out clearly:
"This week and over the weekend…"
He didn't need any further explanation. That line alone told him his weekend was gone.
What Zhan didn't know was that this workload wasn't random. It was Dr. Yibo's way of trying to suppress something he knew he couldn't fully control.
¦
¦
"So what exactly do you want done?"
Nurse Suchue asked, looking at one of the two people seated in her living room.
Fuyue picked up the soda Suchue had placed there earlier, took a long gulp....nearly half the cup....then set it down and looked at her.
"Can you get him fired completely?"
Nurse Suchue burst out laughing as she looked at him.
"That depends on what you're willing to offer…"
Wed, 17 Dec.
2025
Zhanxianyibo💚❤️💛