"To ensure I radiate a blissful smile?"
Furuya Rei narrowed his grey-purple eyes into sharp slits: "According to my predictive models, you explicitly engineered that phrasing to streamline your personal slacking subroutines, didn't you?"
"What specific operational logic permits you to catalog that as slacking? This constitutes a highly rational division of labor~"
Satoru Gojo engulfed a massive payload of rice, agitating his chopstick array to mount a definitive counter-argument.
"In that case, identify the exact specialties within your culinary skill matrix that qualify you to negotiate a division of labor." Furuya's brow arched with clinical precision.
"Mnn... my system is highly optimized to handle the role of taste-testing!"
"Therefore, what specific structural variance separates that role from your current baseline consumption?"
"The variance is astronomically vast." Gojo maintained an exceptionally solemn expression, a presentation that was thoroughly uncharacteristic of his profile. "Wielding a sensory asset as professional as my tastebuds, my system possesses the raw processing capacity to pinpoint the exact structural deficit across any given culinary dish, copy?"
Jinpei Matsuda found himself entirely incapable of refraining from an executive interlude: "Doesn't that simply downshift back into basic consumption?"
"Since parameters have stabilized at this threshold..." Furuya Rei proactively partitioned off a minor fraction of his self-made omurice, extending the placement toward Gojo's vector: "You should theoretically possess the capacity to identify the structural deficits of this specific dish, correct, 'Gastronome' Lord Hisano?"
"A piece of cake."
Upon completing the consumption block, Gojo locked into a protracted sequence of deep internal processing.
Furuya Rei genuinely began to harbor internal expectations that the youth would output a collection of highly constructive, technical parameters. Is the egg blanket thickness unoptimized? Has the ketchup payload breached acceptable limits? Or perhaps...
"Say, are you currently harboring data files regarding a Maid Café?" Gojo formulated the inquiry while projecting an aura of immense, esoteric depth.
"...What specific structural link necessitated the sudden introduction of that topic?"
"When those specialized staff units deliver an omurice deployment to a consumer, they utilize a dual-palm mechanic to organize a cute heart formation, concurrently discharging a sequence of highly adorable verbal scripts such as: 'This constitutes an authentic magical incantation, become delicious, chu chu chu~' or similar linguistic assets." The black-haired, crimson-eyed youth framed his cheeks utilizing both palms: "Factoring in those specific modifiers, the palatability metrics of the omurice genuinely experience an absolute upgrade, you know."
"Haah?! Purge that computational model from your memory bank immediately——"
Concurrently mapping a visual simulation of Furuya Rei executing a labor contract inside a Maid Café, the remaining members of the circle found themselves entirely incapable of suppressing their laughing responses.
Wataru Date casually tracked the chaotic skirmish between Furuya Rei and Satoru Gojo over the final piece of chicken poultry left on the platter, re-routing the topical coordinates: "Speaking of which, our unit has yet to execute a deep data exchange regarding our respective backgrounds, correct?"
"Capitalizing on this rare social window, why don't we synchronize our personal histories? For instance, the core catalysts that drove our respective entries into the police force."
"An acceptable trajectory~" Kenji Hagiwara was the absolute first entity to hoist his arm into the air: "Allow my sector to initiate the download sequence!"
The collective visual focus of the table automatically locked onto his coordinates.
"My family unit historically managed a commercial automotive repair facility, which naturally cultivated my baseline affinity for manipulating mechanical hardware. During my formative years, my primary plan was to inherit the operational leadership of the plant..."
As the narrative cleared his lips, Hagiwara let out a soft sigh: "Regrettably, the macro-economic parameters collapsed, causing every branch facility managed by my old man to slip into absolute bankruptcy, completely halting our expansion vectors. Consequently, I shifted my processing logic to pursue a law enforcement career... after all, this specific corporate sector is mathematically immune to bankruptcy parameters!"
"Naturally, a secondary variable is that the law enforcement uniform cuts an immensely handsome profile!"
Gojo tossed out a rapid line of commentary: "Meaning it acts as a premium multiplier to aggregate popularity points from female demographics?"
"Little Nozomi truly functions as my definitive wingman asset." Hagiwara let out a cheerful laugh, offering zero resistance to the thesis.
"Hey!" Jinpei Matsuda delivered a high-velocity elbow strike straight into his side: "Can you maintain appropriate seriousness metrics for a single microsecond, Hagi!"
"My seriousness metrics are tracking perfectly!" Hagiwara rubbed his rib cage with a visibly wronged expression: "Little Jinpei is the true outlier here, considering the absolute chuunibyou nature of his core motivation for entering the academy..."
"That is fundamentally not chuunibyou——I am processing a highly serious blueprint to deliver an absolute physical beating to the Superintendent General of the Metropolitan Police Department, before systematically replacing his administrative vessel!"
Matsuda downshifted his lips into a smirk, declining to maintain any further data encryption as he smoothly downloaded the historical file regarding his father being falsely accused by law enforcement officers.
"To establish close-quarters proximity with an administrative apex like the Superintendent General, an entity must naturally rise to prominence first, correct?"
The surrounding circle signaled a deep, intuitive comprehension of his emotional profile, offering verbal validation to stabilize his parameters.
...Though, in objective reality, none of them calculated a scenario where this punk would actually execute a literal physical assault against an apex official upon graduation. Furthermore, mapping a simulation of Matsuda functioning as the administrative head of the police department was an absolute challenge to their processing systems.
Wataru Date patted Matsuda's shoulder, re-routing his focus toward the adjacent entity: "What about Furuya?"
The handsome youth sporting short, tea-blonde hair locked into a brief phase of absolute silence, his consciousness apparently diving into a highly specific archival memory: "In objective reality, my primary objective is to track down a specific female entity who abruptly vanished from my operational perimeter—someone who constituted an immensely important anchor during my childhood."
"During my formative years, I was continuously engaged in close-quarters street fights that left my physical chassis saturated with injuries... explicitly because the surrounding juvenile cohorts and an entity of my mixed genetic background fundamentally lacked the capacity to achieve mutual comprehension."
Gojo hoisted his palm into the air: "Data point fully decoded. It tracks identically to the reality that the Sweet Faction and the Savory Faction are mathematically barred from achieving mutual comprehension!"
"Those two data sets share an absolute zero margin of similarity."
Furuya Rei clarified the record: "She functioned as an exceptionally gentle medical practitioner, and I developed a recurring habit of migrating to her facility to request medical treatment. Yet, without a single indicator or predictive warning, her presence vanished completely from the grid."
"If I successfully climb into the structural network of the police force, perhaps I can aggregate sufficient data paths to uncover her current coordinates."
Satoru Gojo possessed absolute cognitive clarity regarding the specific female identity occupying Furuya's processor; she was Elena Miyano, the maternal unit of Shiho Miyano.
Matsuda delivered a sharp critique: "So the overarching motivation routes back to a female entity? You possess an unexpectedly flighty, superficial core framework!"
Hagiwara achieved immediate clarity: "No wonder Little Furuya displays an absolute deficit of interest regarding the mixer events; it turns out his preference coordinates were securely locked down long ago."
"Parameters haven't advanced to that extreme definition..." Furuya murmured.
Wataru Date interjected, his delivery solid: "Regardless of the underlying catalyst, since your physical vessel has successfully crossed into this perimeter, every single motivation commands absolute respect."
"As for my sector, the narrative tracks along a thoroughly traditional blueprint." He scratched the rear quadrant of his skull: "My primary objective is to evolve into a police officer possessing sufficient structural power to execute absolute justice to its logical conclusion!"
"Eh——isn't that an exceptionally cool presentation!"
Date let out a warm laugh, declining to unpack the granular details of his timeline any further.
"Moving forward, what about Morofushi?"
Hiromitsu Morofushi gently deposited his chopsticks onto the ceramic resting unit: "The variance in my parameters is likely a direct result of my older brother's immense influence. He functions as a remarkably elite detective within the homicide division, and my system has continuously utilized his profile as its definitive blueprint."
"Aside from that variable, there exist certain historical anomalies... whose absolute truth I must personally unearth."
The surrounding circle traded a succession of rapid, intuitive glances, mutually executing an encryption protocol to refrain from interrogating his boundaries.
"Consequently, the trajectory rotates straight to Little Nozomi!" Hagiwara injected a fresh burst of energy to maintain the social atmosphere: "Our current files indicate your entry was driven strictly by the parameter of 'entertainment,' but where does the granular definition lie—surely your system doesn't operate under the exclusive mandate of putting your physical chassis in harm's way?"
"Regarding that item... during the opening phase of the timeline, my cognitive models did indeed align with that specific thesis."
A series of highly mischievous, brilliant sparks danced within those ruby-like eyes: "However, looking at the current board state, I register the distinct impression that every single coordinate inside this perimeter is saturated with entertainment~"
Furuya Rei tracked the data point with curiosity: "Provide a specific example?"
"Within the confines of this exact room, hasn't an immense cluster of highly entertaining specimens aggregated together?"
Satoru Gojo began summarizing their profiles as though reviewing a catalog of rare items: "Little Matsuda, who harbors a delusion of grandieur regarding the Superintendent General seat; Zero-kun, who is aggressively tracking an older female medical practitioner; Date-san, who aspires to manifest as a literal superhero... Little Hagiwara, whose processing loops are entirely consumed with becoming a global heartthrob; and finally, my absolute premium roommate asset, Little Hiro."
Matsuda bellowed instantly: "Hey! Who exactly are you classifying under the parameters of harboring a delusion?!"
The visual curvature of the black-haired youth's lips expanded progressively, the corners of his eyes narrowing slightly as though his vision currently housed a brilliant, unmitigated field of starlight.
Wataru Date let out a booming laugh: "If an entity of Hisano's caliber registers our profiles as genuinely entertaining, we must constitute an exceptionally remarkable band of brothers, wouldn't you say?"
"Switching tracks, my system has continuously harbored immense curiosity regarding a alternate variable..."
Hagiwara propped his chin against his palm, directing his focus toward Gojo: "What specific variety of family unit possesses the structural mechanics to cultivate a child as thoroughly unique as Little Nozomi?"
Noticing that the facial expressions of both Hiromitsu Morofushi and Furuya Rei shifted into a distinctly strained alignment, he rapidly injected a clarifying modifier: "There is an absolute zero margin of derogatory intent inside this inquiry—it is explicitly framed under the positive definition of 'unique,' copy."
Gojo delivered the data point with absolute tranquility: "Ah, my formative years were processed entirely within the structural parameters of an orphanage."
"..."
The instant the data cleared his lips, every single entity anchored to the space locked into a state of absolute silence.
"Hey, hey~" Gojo felt entirely helpless: "Refrain from organizing your facial configurations into such a perfectly synchronized expression of sorrow, copy? My background file is completely devoid of a tragic narrative arc."
Kenji Hagiwara: Formulating the defense using that specific linguistic architecture merely causes the reality to sound infinitely more devastating, alright!
"Though my current life cycle has yet to log a single encounter with an authentic biological family unit, my personal existence has continuously tracked at maximum happiness metrics, you know."
In objective reality, his cognitive processor was delivering an absolute truth.
When his identity was bound to the designation of "Jiang Wu," his parameters were completely detached from a family structure. Shifting to his manifestation as "Satoru Gojo" within the Jujutsu world, his baseline relationship with his parental units shared a closer structural alignment with a master-servant dynamic than an authentic household bond. As for his current incarnation inside this Detective Conan universe, his memory files regarding his parents were an absolute void.
Though he had yet to execute a clinical forensic investigation into the matter, the high-probability hypothesis suggested that the demise of the former Gojo head and his spouse was inextricably linked to the operational machinations of the old demon Renya Karasuma.
The system abruptly integrated into his thoughts: [Factoring in those exact parameters, Host, does your current trajectory not mathematically constitute treating an absolute adversary as a paternal figure?]
[Hey, hey, cease the dissemination of unverified structural fabrications. My processing filters have never once permitted the release of that disgusting honorific.]
Had it not been for the absolute necessity of maintaining the structural integrity of his Black Organization undercover asset shell, who would waste a single microsecond engaging in sophisticated superficial pleasantries with that ancient fossil?
Right at that juncture, Hiromitsu Morofushi presented an inquiry with visible hesitation: "That... Nozomi-kun, prior to processing your formal enrollment within the police academy, did your system possess any highly intimate companion nodes?"
"During my tenure within the orphanage network, I established a connection with a certain punk, the relationship metrics tracked at a highly optimal level." Gojo shrugged his shoulders: "However, our paths have failed to intersect for a substantial block of time. He has likely wiped my profile completely from his memory bank by now."
In a highly specific sense, his communication loop was completely devoid of deception. The exact microsecond his mind mapped the reality that the punk Jin Blackazawa hadn't routed a single text communication to his terminal over a six-month duration, his internal irritation metrics experienced a massive spike.
Wataru Date pursued the data trail with immense caution: "Are there any alternate entities logged within your profile?"
"...There exists a singular alternate entity. However, his vessel has already crossed into a distinct universe that clears completely beyond my personal reach."
To be mathematically precise, he was referencing the authentic, original "Satoru Gojo."
"..."
Confronted with the progressively suffocating, heavy expressions locking down the room, Gojo attempted to deploy an administrative stabilization protocol: "Therefore, I am ordering you to cease organizing your faces into that specific layout."
He was fundamentally not executing a calculated tactical strike against their emotional defenses, dammit! Terminate the unguided mental simulation loops immediately!
Faced with a collective gaze that practically screamed the phrase "Cease your continuous simulation of emotional resilience," he registered a profound sense of absolute helplessness.
The silver lining was that the continuous, unmitigated torrent of impression metrics flooding his system registry effectively balanced out the psychological exhaustion.
Wataru Date opened his mouth, his vocal subroutines stalling out before he ultimately chose to compress his lips, his gaze locking onto the black-haired youth with immense complexity.
——So that constitutes the underlying truth.
——No wonder his baseline demeanor continuously projects an absolute disregard for the collective external world. It turns out he is merely deploying that sophisticated defense mechanism to encrypt the profound isolation anchoring his internal core?
To think this was the elite powerhouse entity his own parameters had continuously aspired to emulate...
Jinpei Matsuda's brow furrowed into a tight knot, his visual receptors drifting erratically across the floor coordinates, looking precisely like an individual who was simultaneously experiencing severe frustration over his prior abrasive conduct and intense paralysis regarding the correct execution of a comforting protocol.
"Hey, Hisano..." He initiated the vocal line only to freeze instantly, aggressively clawing through his curly hair with visible irritation.
Furuya Rei and Hiromitsu Morofushi had logged his background parameters long ago, yet the granular details downloaded during this session were entirely fresh. They prepared to deploy comforting linguistic assets, yet their cognitive engines failed to organize a valid structural starting point.
"Little Nozomi——"
Kenji Hagiwara abruptly executed a high-velocity forward launch, expanding his upper limbs to forcefully lock Satoru Gojo into an immense, unmitigated embrace.
Caught completely off-guard by this sudden physical containment protocol, Gojo's structural processing stalled for a microsecond, causing half of the chocolate donut anchored between his teeth to detach and plunge toward the floor. Hagiwara's muffled vocal output cleared straight adjacent to his shoulder line.
"...I am registering an absolute willingness to function as your permanent companion, I will anchor myself to your perimeter, copy."
"Hey, hey, Little Hagiwara, your structure is——" Gojo prepared to initiate a high-intensity physical struggle to break the containment, only to register the additional structural weight of several distinct sets of palms embedding onto his back.
Jinpei Matsuda awkwardly patted his shoulder blade, muttering under his breath: "Though your profile tracks as a textbook operational hazard... as far as serving as a valid companion node goes, your metrics barely clear the threshold of qualification."
"Matsuda, this specific timeline mandates the absolute termination of your tsundere protocols." Furuya Rei locked his visual focus squarely onto Gojo's eyes: "Since your internal calculations indicate that remaining anchored to our circle generates valid entertainment... extending your dwell time within this perimeter introduces zero structural violations, correct?"
Wataru Date's broad, heavy palm descended with massive force onto his shoulder: "Hisano, should your system encounter a future task configuration that requires auxiliary processing power, simply route the demand to my vector at any given microsecond."
"My sector echoes that exact sentiment." Hiromitsu Morofushi nodded his head, his eyes displaying an exceptionally gentle warmth that mirrored the exact presentation of an older sibling monitoring a younger asset.
Gojo blinked his eyes in rapid succession, evaluating the tight cluster of human frames completely surrounding his person, momentarily experiencing a deeply conflicted sensation between absolute amusement and sheer bewilderment.
"Hey, hey." His vocal tone maintained its baseline flippant register. "What specific game is this unit running? My system has zero requirement for human sympathy, copy?"
"This is fundamentally decoupled from the concept of sympathy." Hagiwara finally disengaged the physical containment protocol, his features loosening into a cheerful grin: "This is the definitive manifestation of the Onizuka Class Eternal Bonds——!"
"...The lot of you." Gojo let out a prolonged, weary sigh: "Are an absolute pack of idiots."
Yet, defying his internal logic, the visual alignment of his lips tilted subtly upward into a genuine smirk.
Following the conclusion of the midday meal, the collective group initiated sanitation protocols to process the spent utensils and clear the structural residue. The water terminal discharged a continuous, rushing stream, the fluid surface generating a multi-colored shimmer across the soap bubble arrays.
During the dishwashing sequence, Gojo intentionally delivered a minor lateral body-check against Matsuda's shoulder: "Right, Little Matsuda, during the subsequent close-quarters hand-to-hand combat training block, our units are scheduled for a direct single-combat simulation. Do we possess the clearance to organize a wager?"
"Ha? Identify the stakes."
"The entity who suffers a definitive defeat inherits the logistical obligation to manage the alternate entity's laundry parameters for a solid one-week duration. How does that track?"
"Vetoed——!!"
"Ah, what specific logic drove the rejection? Could it be that Little Matsuda's confidence metrics are tracking at a deficit..."
"If your communication loop discharges a single additional line of verbal garbage, I will physically submerge your skull into this rinse basin. Propose an alternate stake and my system might evaluate the parameters."
Actively sanitizing the dining table, Kenji Hagiwara suddenly poked his head into their geographic sector: "For instance, the entity who logs a definitive defeat must don a complete female outfit to report for the subsequent academic block?"
"Hey, hey, Hagi, are your calculation models operating within sane limits?"
"This specific recommendation possesses exceptional structural merit." Furuya Rei maneuvered adjacent to them while wielding a cleaning cloth: "The visual data point of Matsuda swathed in a female wardrobe array is bound to yield an immense return on investment."
"Haah? Compared to that layout, forcing Furuya to execute a labor contract inside a Maid Café tracks as an infinitely superior option——"
Wataru Date delivered an incredibly solemn addition: "How about this compromise? The entity who suffers the defeat must not only don the female wardrobe array but concurrently march straight to Instructor Onizuka's coordinates, execute a maximum-standard military salute, and state: 'Reporting to the Instructor, I am the brand-new female transfer student logged into your roster'!"
"Class Leader——!!!"
Hiromitsu Morofushi let out an instantaneous, uninhibited laugh.
"The collective imagination mechanics of this unit are tracking at an excessively wild definition, aren't they?"
Despite the reality that they were enclosed within an indoor structure completely isolated from direct solar radiation, Morofushi registered the distinct impression that his entire physical chassis was swathed in an immense, ambient warmth.
Perhaps... the precise thermal metrics his system had permanently shed during his formative childhood trauma were systematically routing their way back into his life cycle via an alternate, brilliant methodology. The gentle smile of his mother, the powerful, secure embrace of his father—the specific warmth he had calculated to be permanently expunged from the universe was, at this exact millisecond, utilizing this raucous, chaotic circle of companions to piece by piece fill the vacant voids anchoring his soul.
"Is Hisano-kun currently running an identical computational model inside his own mind?"
Satoru Gojo possessed an absolute deficit of awareness regarding the internal thought stream currently playing out within Morofushi's processor. In objective reality, during the execution of his dishwashing subroutines, a minute trace of baseline hesitation had actually surfaced within the deep layers of his internal processor.
The water terminal discharged its rushing payload, the freezing liquid droplets splashing against the back of his hand, forcing his consciousness into a brief phase of crystalline clarity.
Was it a structural error... back during the opening phase of the timeline, to intentionally embed his physical profile within their immediate perimeter simply to aggregate impression metrics?
In short order, that specific sliver of hesitation was forcefully downshifted into the depths of his processing vault, vanishing completely from the grid.
"Little Nozomi, what specific data point has locked down your cognitive processor?" Kenji Hagiwara close the distance to deliver a playful poke against his cheek.
It appeared that following the finalization of their emotional exchange block, this specific entity's baseline motivation to execute physical contact protocols against his chassis had experienced an exponential surge.
"Ah, there is zero structural anomaly." Gojo shook his head, lowering his eyelids to obscure his vision.
"My system is merely validating..."
At the bare minimum, the distinct warmth and genuine emotional data streams prompting him to extend his dwell time within this specific temporal coordinate... were fundamentally not a fabrication.
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100 Power Stones = 1 Bonus Chapter
10 Reviews = 1 Bonus chapter