I woke up in a room darker than a night sky without stars.
There was nothing—no walls, no floor, no ceiling. Just darkness. Not the comforting kind that comes with closed eyes, but the kind that presses in, heavy and absolute. My eyes were open. I knew they were. And yet, no matter how long I stared, nothing appeared.
I couldn't feel anything either. No cold. No warmth. No weight to my body. It was like existing without proof that I existed at all.
I waited. And I waited some more. But nothing changed. I couldn't see anything, and somehow, if it was even possible, the room kept getting darker and darker. And with every passing second, my heartbeat – which, for some reason, I could not feel – getting faster and faster.
Where am I? What even is this place?
How did I end up here? I can't remember. I tried to rake my brain to remember.
My thoughts fractured, breaking apart before I could hold onto them.
Panic began to rise, sharp and sudden.
And then—
Doors opened.
I was certain they hadn't been there before. No outline. No seam in the darkness. But now they stood before me, cutting through the void like a wound, spilling light feeling inevitable.
"Welcome to Purgatory! You shall be judged by four. The four beings most impacted by your actions: the being you were the most cruel to, the being you were the nicest to, the being who was saved by your actions, and the being who died because of your choices," says the angel.
"Step forward," the angel said.
Four figures waited beyond the doors.
They did not move.
They did not breathe.
They all had my face.
There had never been anyone else.
I had been cruel to myself.
I had been kind to myself.
I had saved myself.
And I had killed myself too.