The day after my victory in the extra-spicy curry challenge, I visited the volcanic domain of the Seventh Floor.
"Pandora's Actor. Demiurge told me you were coming. This way," greeted the monster leading me. It was Evil Lord Wrath, a demon of immense physical stature, who escorted me through the ruins of a collapsed temple.
"Quite the interesting mechanism," I remarked as he manipulated a pillar, causing a ruined staircase to reconstruct itself into a perfect set of steps. Wrath didn't respond, so I simply shrugged and began the ascent to Demiurge's private study.
"Well now, Demiurge. I appreciate you sending a guide."
"A promise is a promise," Demiurge replied, surrounded by piles of strategic documents. The sheer volume of paperwork spoke of his desperation to avoid another failure. "I simply wished to hear your... unique perspective."
"I'm glad to hear it. Though, to be honest, I have little interest in micromanaging your battle plans." I sat in the chair across from his desk. "But before we start, I have a question. Why do you—and the other Guardians—hold humans in such low regard? Do you not see how terrifying they can be?"
Demiurge's brow twitched. "They are weak. They are inferior. They possess no grand purpose. They only survived because of their numbers, like the fifteen hundred fools who once dared to invade this sanctuary."
"Ah, the foundation of Ainz Ooal Gown's philosophy," I mused. "The first nine members—the original 'Nines Own Goal'—stood up for the weak. They sought to avenge heteromorphs who were hunted by humans. Momonga mentioned in the Treasury that the raid of the fifteen hundred was largely an act of retaliation for that vengeance."
"Ugly. Pathetic. Small," Demiurge spat. "I was defeated by such creatures once. That makes the version of me that fell even more hideous. I will not repeat that mistake."
In that moment, I knew I was right. The Demiurge standing before me was not the same one who had experienced that defeat.
"I see. For you, that defeat is a 'record,' not a 'memory.'"
There is a vast difference. A memory carries the sting of regret, the cold sweat of fear, and the wisdom born of failure. A record is just information—like reading a history book. To Demiurge, the defeat was an insult to his programming, causing him to feel rage and murderous intent toward humans, rather than the healthy caution a survivor would have.
"You have humans in Nazarick, don't you? Aura, Mare, Aureole Omega. Even Yamaiko's sister was an Elf—a human-type race."
"They are companions," Demiurge snapped. "They are different."
"How convenient. 'They are different because they are mine.' Isn't that exactly how humans think?" I watched him grit his teeth. "You believe the weak should be trampled by the strong. You want to crush the Black Scripture not because they are a threat, but because you want to satisfy your own sadistic urges. Am I wrong?"
"I—"
"You are underestimating them," I said, leaning forward and pointing a finger at him. "Momonga and Kawasaki ordered you to destroy the Black Scripture. They did not order you to play with your food. If you incorporate your desire for cruelty into the mission, you will create an opening. And in that opening, you will be the one who gets tripped up."
I brushed his hand away as he reached for my collar in a flash of anger. "Lord Momonga said: death to enemies, salvation to those who submit. He did not say: 'satisfy Demiurge's boredom.' You are a servant. Act like one."
Demiurge stared at me, then looked down at his plans. Without a word, he set the top document on fire. "You are right. That plan was... self-indulgent. A mistake."
"I'm glad you understand. And one more thing... you should ask Master Kawasaki about the true meaning of the word 'Evil' that Ulbert gave you. It wasn't just about being a monster."
A message from Albedo echoed in our minds, summoning all Guardians to the Ninth Floor.
"It seems our time is up. Ask Kawasaki later," I said, heading for the exit.
***
A few hours earlier, on the outskirts of the Great Forest of Tob...
"Lord Ainz! Master Kawasaki! I've rounded up some test subjects!" Aura chirped.
She had gathered a respectable number of forest monsters for the second experiment with the skill Everything Becomes Ingredients. Kawasaki, now in his orange Cookman form, patted Aura and Mare on the head.
"Good job, you two. I'll make you some pudding later as a reward. Don't tell Albedo, though."
"Really?! Thank you!" they shouted in unison.
Ainz watched them leave before turning to Kawasaki. "Ready to begin?"
"Wait. I've discovered something new. My 'Appraisal' skill shows something called 'Food Compatibility' when I look at monsters."
"Is that why the first experiment failed?" Ainz asked. "Because skeletons have a compatibility of zero?"
"Probably. These forest beasts average around ten. The highest is thirty. It's better than the undead, at least."
They activated the skill. A massive cauldron manifested with a low, earth-shaking rumble. The forest monsters were sucked in, and Kawasaki began the "cooking" process with his oversized ladle.
"Snake meat... a bit tough, but tastes like chicken," Kawasaki narrated as items began to pop out of the pot. "Dog meat... you know, Momonga, they say this is a delicacy in some places. Want a sample?"
"I'll pass," Ainz said flatly. "Look! We got a Mid-Healing Potion! Finally, something better than the 'Minor' series."
"And Firebird breast meat... I'll have to salt-grill that later. Ooh, and rabbit."
Kawasaki was in his element, sorting through the ingredients. But then, the cauldron began to vibrate violently. A dark, ominous aura leaked from the lid.
"Kawasaki! The pot's reacting!"
Pop.
An item landed on the grass. It was a mannequin wearing... a purple string bikini. It had fur tufts on the chest and hips, a wolf tail, and matching ears. A sign around its neck read: Dangerous Beast.
"..."
"..."
The silence was deafening.
"THIS STUPID POT!" Kawasaki roared, his voice reaching a beastly pitch. He grabbed the cauldron by its legs.
"Kawasaki! Stop! That's a rare item!" Ainz shouted, but it was too late.
Kawasaki's strength was at the cap for his level. He began to spin like a cyclone, the pot becoming a blur of metal and magic.
"GO TO HELL!"
He released the pot. It flew through the air, breaking the sound barrier, and vanished into the deep forest. A few seconds later, a thunderous CRACK echoed through the trees, followed by a roar that shook the very earth.
"GOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAH!"
A massive, multi-tentacled tree monster began to rise in the distance, its sleep disturbed by a high-velocity magical cauldron to the face.
"Oops," Kawasaki said, sticking out his tongue.
"DON'T 'OOPS' ME!" Ainz screamed, delivering a sharp chop to the chef's head.
***
To the north-northwest of Nazarick, in the wetlands inhabited by the Lizardmen, the brothers Zaryusu and Shasuryu were inspecting their fish farm.
"A chief shouldn't be sneaking snacks at the farm, brother," Zaryusu teased.
Shasuryu, the massive leader of the Green Claw tribe, thrashed his tail against the mud. "I'm just checking the growth. I have no intention of eating."
"Is that so? Because these farm-raised fish are much fattier than the ones in the lake. The flavor just explodes when you bite them..."
"Ngggh!" Shasuryu's tail hit the ground even harder.
"My sister-in-law was right," Zaryusu laughed. "Your tail always gives you away."
The lighthearted moment was shattered by a sound like a mountain collapsing. They turned toward the center of the lake.
"What is that...?"
A gargantuan tree monster with six colossal tentacles—Zy'tl Q'ae—was rampaging. It wasn't attacking their village, but it was slamming its limbs into the settlement of a neighboring tribe. With every strike, the lake water seemed to be sucked into the creature's roots, the water level dropping at a visible rate.
"Stop it!" Zaryusu screamed, though his voice was a whisper against the monster's roar. The brothers turned and sprinted back to their village to sound the alarm.
***
"Thanks for bringing me here, Picky," Clementine said.
"Master Kawasaki ordered me to assist you whenever possible," the mushroom-headed Sous-chef replied. "But I have only granted you thirty minutes. Understood?"
"Yeah, I got it."
Clementine stepped into the log house where Nigun and the other survivors were staying. She was essentially a prisoner in Kawasaki's room, but being his "benefactor" gave her just enough leverage to move under guard.
"Nigun. We need to talk about the Archbishop."
Nigun looked up from his prayers. He looked like a different man—the madness had left his eyes, replaced by a somber clarity. "I told Ainz and Kawasaki everything I remember... which isn't much. I saw something in the Archbishop's chambers, and then... the world changed. I suddenly hated everything that wasn't human."
"My brother, Kuaiese, was called to those chambers a lot," Clementine noted. "He's a sadistic prick, but even he changed after a few visits."
"Wait," Nigun said, his voice dropping. "All four of us who were called in that day were followers of the God Surshana."
"I knew it!" Clementine exclaimed. "My parents followed the God of Light, but I turned to Surshana to spite them. If everyone being called is a Surshana worshiper, then the Archbishop is specifically targeting the faithful of the God of Death for brainwashing."
"It's possible," Nigun agreed. "If they are manipulating our faith to turn us into genocidal weapons... then the entire Theocracy is a lie."
"I want to get Liriope out," Clementine said, referring to the Thousand Mile Astrologer. "She's a friend, and she helped me find Kawasaki. I don't want her to end up like you did."
Before they could plan further, the door opened. Picky stood there. "Clementine. Master Kawasaki and Lord Ainz have summoned you. We must leave at once."
Clementine waved to Nigun and hurried out. Nigun watched her go, a small, sad smile on his face. He knew that the Black Scripture and the woman in the white cheongsam were doomed the moment they crossed paths with the masters of Nazarick.
Next — Prep Work: Part 1
***
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