After a long, heavy silence, the tension in Wren's shoulders vanished as if a switch had been flipped. A warm, effortless smile returned to his face. "I think it's best we both get some rest for now," Wren said, his tone gentle again.
Wren stepped closer and asked warmly, "But before we turn in, I wanted to ask, would you like me to check on the baby?"
Benjamin stared at him, unnerved by how seamlessly Wren shifted from a cold, calculated person to a warm, kind person. Which one was the real Wren?
"I haven't decided whether I will keep it or not," Benjamin said. "And, I don't know if anything has happened due to the recent incidents."
Wren blinked, the easy smile slipping from his face. "Why not, Ben?" He said it gently, like he was already working through the answer. "Is it because of Charles? Are you afraid he doesn't want the child?"
"It has nothing to do with Charles," Benjamin said quietly. He felt himself getting emotional. His stomach churning.
Wren shook his head, struggling to process Benjamin's rejection. "Charles doesn't have to know, Ben. We can keep this between us. I would love that child with everything I am. Please, don't do this just because of a man who doesn't deserve you."
Benjamin stared in confusion. Here it was again, another one of Wren's personalities. Minutes ago Wren had been coldly interrogating him about the research file and his past. And now, he was concerned about Benjamin's child and offering his devotion to him with a warmth that felt genuine.
Benjamin couldn't reconcile the different facets of Wren and had run out of energy to try.
Quietly, Benjamin tried to drop the subject. "Let's not do this, Wren."
Wren went quiet. His eyes dropped to the floor and stayed there. Then he nodded, once, slowly.
"You're right." When Wren looked up, he once again had that same warm smile. He stood up and smoothed the front of his shirt. "I'm sure we can discuss it at a later time, when things are less tense."
Later that night, after dinner, Wren looked across the table and confessed, "I know about the child, but that hasn't changed how I feel about you," Wren said, looking at Benjamin steadily. "Since our journey to Amara, I knew something was different about you. On our return trip, I was shocked to learn the truth, but when I did find out, I still wanted you, Benjamin. Exactly as you are."
Benjamin did not know how to respond. Was this about the research? Another angle, another method of extracting information from him? Or was it something else entirely, something that had nothing to do with the files and everything to do with him personally? He wasn't sure which possibility unsettled him more.
"I… I'm confused Wren," Benjamin said.
"About what?"
"What is it that you want from me? Is it the research files? Is that what all of this is?"
Wren laughed it off. "I shouldn't have brought it up."
In the days that followed, he waited anxiously as he began second-guessing everything. He turned the conversation over and over, looking for the lie in it. Did Wren truly have feelings for him? Would Charles come at all? Was Wren buying time, and if so, for what? Was Wren waiting for him to break?
** ** ** * ** ** * ** * ** * *
Wren was slowly unraveling. He couldn't reconcile the attraction he felt towards Benjamin and the research that Benjamin wouldn't help him with— the files that he still had.
It bothered him more than he wanted to admit that he had to go out of his way to reach Charles privately, of all people. The man he couldn't stand. And now he was inviting him into his home.
Wren caught himself wondering what Charles had that he didn't. Was it his golden hair and purple eyes? Was it really that simple? Benjamin wasn't superficial. He then thought of Atlas and wondered what Atlas had ever seen in him. He couldn't figure it out.
He spent the next few days planning it carefully. Benjamin and Charles would need privacy—he understood that. But he couldn't leave Benjamin unguarded, and the files even less so.
The thought of Charles touching him made something tighten in his chest. He pushed it down.
In quieter moments his mind drifted somewhere else entirely. Him and Benjamin in an open field, a child running ahead of them through the grass. A girl, maybe. Benjamin would be laughing at something. They would have a blanket spread out and nowhere else to be.
It was a beautiful scene. And then Atlas was there, watching from a distance with that familiar smile.
Why did it all feel so far away? It was all within reach. He could see it clearly. So why couldn't he grasp it? Why did it feel as if it would slip away from his fingers?
Charles. That was why. Charles, who should have been out of the picture. He was already engaged to the Imperial Princess. His future had already been mapped out and sealed. Why couldn't he be satisfied with that? So why was he still here? Why did he keep casting a shadow over something that didn't belong to him?
Wren let himself feel it all for a moment. The irritation and the anger. Then he put it away. He needed to be level-headed if he wanted to come out of this with what he wanted.
He was interrupted by a sharp knock on the door. It was Jae. "Master Baek, he is here. He came alone as requested."
Wren shook a few pills into his palm and swallowed them with a glass of water. "I'll be there."