(ASA)
I scrunched my face in embarrassment. "I… I was hoping to become a teacher. I was completely focused on that. I… I didn't want to have to depend on an alpha. My goal was financial independence and then perhaps love. I... I was hoping that if love were in the cards for me, I'd fall in love the regular way. But it seems my life trajectory has changed drastically."
"Huh." He still looked nonplussed. "I didn't realize you'd never… been with anyone."
I winced. "It isn't the sort of thing I wanted to advertise."
"Right." He frowned. "So, have you had your first heat?"
I shook my head. "Not yet. Until very recently, I've always taken suppressants."
"I see. We'll have to get you back on those ASAP." His nostrils flared, and his eyes seemed a brighter blue. He turned his head so that I couldn't see his expression well.
"Do I really need to go back on those?" I grumbled. "They make me feel bloated."
"Yes." He cleared his throat. "But as to your earlier suggestion, I'm afraid I don't really like the idea of you seeking other alphas for sex."
"No?" His response was surprising and perplexing. If he didn't want me, what did he care if I sought sexual release elsewhere? God, alphas could be so fucking territorial. "I wouldn't bring them here, of course."
"Still," he murmured, not looking at me. "I don't like the idea."
I frowned. "If it's a pride thing, I… I'd be discreet."
He shook his head. "No."
No?
I gave a confused laugh. "But… you don't want me. I don't understand why you'd care."
He faced me, and his face was hard, eyes cold. "You don't have to understand. You simply have to obey. I bought you. I own you. I'm not lending you out to other alphas."
"Even though you… hire omegas to… handle your needs?"
"We're not the same, Asa."
"I see," I mumbled. "I'm just a lowly omega?"
He grimaced. "That's not what I'm trying to say, but I'm not going to let you sleep around. I'm sorry. It's out of the question."
"So, I'm just supposed to never have sex? You're going to keep me on suppression pills the rest of my life?" My voice wobbled with anger.
Who the hell did he think he was? If he didn't want me, what right did he have to tell me I wasn't allowed to have any sexual release?
His face twitched. "Maybe I'll stop hiring those omegas when I'm rutting."
I narrowed my eyes. "So, we'll just both suffer? You think that will make it all better for me?"
He raked a hand through his dark hair. "I don't really feel like talking about this anymore."
I blinked at him. "But, you're not being fair to me."
"Life isn't fair sometimes, Asa. You, of all people, must know that." His tone was dismissive as if he'd decided the conversation was over, so it was over.
I scowled. "I guess Mrs. Gentry was right when she said you lack empathy."
A red flush moved up his face. "Excuse me? You were gossiping about me with Mrs. Gentry?"
"No. I was saying you were kind, and she said that wasn't your usual MO." I stood. "Seems she was right and I was wrong."
"I'm very empathetic," he rasped.
I chuffed. "Right."
"You wouldn't be standing here if I weren't empathetic."
"If you say so."
Anger glittered in his cold eyes. "You have no idea what your fate almost was, omega. By now, you'd have probably been raped hundreds of times by Nigel."
I took a step back, shocked at his harsh tone. "What?"
"I saved you from him, you little ingrate," he growled. "He's not just a creep, he's a monster, Asa. He'd have used you and tossed you aside. But I stepped in. Me. I spent an obscene amount of money to protect you from him. Instead of insulting me, you should fall on your knees and thank me. I do not need you. I don't know what to do with you. You have no place in my life, but you're here because of the fucking kindness of my heart."
I had no idea how to respond.
While I'd known Zev wasn't thrilled about my presence in his life, he was letting me know, in no uncertain terms, that he wanted nothing to do with me. I was a nuisance.
He truly had pitied me.
While I was obviously grateful to have escaped Nigel's clutches, Zevran was making me feel horrible. Unwanted. Worthless.
My throat was thick as I said, "I didn't ask you to bid on me."
"No. You didn't. But I did it to protect you."
"Why bother? If you're just going to make me feel horrible for being here, why bother?" I hissed, face quivering.
A muscle worked in his cheek, and there was confusion in his eyes. "I just did, okay? Finlay couldn't outbid Nigel, so I stepped in."
I felt sick to my stomach as I held his frustrated gaze. Why was I even bothering to argue with him? It didn't matter what I said. He didn't care what I thought or how I felt. I was an omega. The lowest of the low.
"As ungrateful as you are," he muttered, "I should sell you. Or maybe just rent you out. You were popular at The Auction. Maybe I could get a pretty penny simply using you like a broodmare. Get my investment back."
I shuddered, fear shooting through me.
Would he really do that? Pass me around from horny alpha to horny alpha until eventually I got too old and no one wanted me?
"D… don't you dare," I whispered.
His eyes glittered with malice. "Then show a little gratitude, Asa."
I held his glare, trembling. "I won't let you use me that way. I… I won't."
He curled his lip. "What are you going to do about it? You have no say in the matter. You're my property."
Gritting my teeth, I turned and headed toward the door of his study. He called out to me, but I just kept going. Once in the foyer, I stopped walking, trying to control the panic roaring through me.
Would he actually do that to me? Hire me out like a broodmare?
I didn't know Zev well enough to know what he was capable of. He'd certainly sounded serious enough.
I do not need you. I don't know what to do with you. You have no place in my life…
One thing was for sure, I didn't belong here. He didn't want me here. He'd made no bones about that. At the Auction, he'd had a moment of sympathy, and now he regretted it. I was a weight around his neck. He didn't want me, but he had no idea what to do with me either.
Maybe I'd solve his problem for him. Heart pounding, I turned sharply and made a beeline for the front door. Thankfully, none of the staff was around. Mrs. Gentry might have tried to stop me if she'd seen me striding toward the door, but she wasn't there.
I opened the door and slipped out, closing the door softly behind me.
I ran across the circular driveway, past the big marble fountain. I had no idea where I was going as I slipped into the thick wall of aspen trees.
Panic buzzed through me as I bolted through the brush, following the driveway. It would take me to the main road, and from there, I had no idea what to do next. Maybe I'd bum a ride.
Maybe I'd jump in front of a bus.
The branches of the trees stung my cheek, but I just ran faster. Could I be arrested for running away when I'd been bought and paid for? I had no idea. All I knew was I would never willingly submit to being passed around from alpha to alpha. But Zevran had looked dead serious when he'd said that to me.
I felt I had no choice other than to run. I had to save myself because no one else was going to do it for me.