Colossus lowered his head slightly, his ears already red.
"Wade has leaned on me… more than once."
Eve: …
Deadpool: …
Yukio: …
"Wow… wow," Eve finally managed.
The concentration of Deadpool in that sentence was dangerously high.
Yukio slowly turned her head toward Wade with a constipated expression.
Deadpool covered his face with both hands.
His brother was hopeless.
The girl had already flirted to this level, and he was still talking about Wade leaning on his shoulder.
He deserved his Magician title.
---
"Alright," Eve inhaled slowly.
If she didn't take the initiative now, she might genuinely lose her brand-new superhero boyfriend to that shameless man named Wade.
She stood up.
Then straddled Colossus directly.
Sat on his lap.
Her finger lightly tapped his lips.
"He leaned on your shoulder," she whispered. "What about here?"
Colossus's entire face turned bright red.
He lowered his head, shaking slightly.
Eve hooked a finger under his chin, lifting his face gently so he had no choice but to meet her eyes.
She leaned closer.
Under the bed—
Deadpool and Yukio's auntie smiles returned in full force.
Outside the window—
Negasonic Teenage Warhead clung to the sill, holding a tiny mirror to reflect the scene inside.
She, too, wore an auntie smile.
At the moment their lips touched—
Colossus trembled violently.
His large hands flailed awkwardly in the air like malfunctioning windmills.
The atmosphere thickened.
Electric.
The long-standing Magician career of Piotr Rasputin was on the verge of ending.
And then—
Flash.
A brief beam of reflected light from the mirror outside bounced off the wardrobe sequins.
Negasonic froze.
"Damn," she muttered, pulling the mirror back too late.
Colossus's reflexes were elite.
He instantly sensed the abnormal flash.
He pulled Eve back and rushed to the window—
Just in time to see a short-haired figure in black-and-yellow sprinting away.
Colossus: …
"Piotr? What's wrong?" Eve asked breathlessly from the bed.
"Nothing," he replied, closing the window with a darker-than-usual expression.
Eve's cheeks deepened in color.
"It was just a kiss… you don't need to close the window, right?"
Colossus took a deep breath and returned to sit beside her.
They looked at each other again.
The air thickened once more.
Then—
Colossus froze.
If Negasonic was here…
Where was Yukio?
And if Yukio was here…
Where would she hide?
His eyes slowly drifted toward the spacious area beneath the bed.
He stood up abruptly.
Bent down.
Looked underneath.
"Hi~ Piotr~" ×2
Deadpool and Yukio, caught with zero escape routes, gave synchronized bright smiles and waved.
Colossus: !!!
---
Without speaking, he reached down and grabbed for Wade's collar.
Deadpool twisted like a slippery loach and shot out the other side of the bed with a perfect carp leap.
He stood up, brushing imaginary dust from himself.
"What a coincidence. Everyone's here."
Yukio crawled out quietly, lips pouted, looking slightly ashamed.
Colossus's fists clenched.
His muscles popped like cracking beans.
His body expanded.
Skin shifting into polished silver.
Deadpool backed away immediately.
"Wait, wait, wait—"
Slap!
A metal hand the size of a fan smacked him across the head.
Stars.
Concussion.
Before he could recover, Colossus snapped specialized handcuffs onto Wade's wrist—locking him to his own arm.
Tiny locking pins extended internally, securing Deadpool's wrist so tightly that even thumb dislocation wouldn't work.
Deadpool tugged experimentally.
"Wow. You're kinky. Carrying handcuffs around?"
"They were made specifically for you, Wade."
Deadpool's eyes widened dramatically.
He cupped his cheeks and tilted his head shyly.
"Why didn't you confess earlier, Piotr? If you'd shown this passion before, you wouldn't still be called Magician."
Eve blinked.
"Wait… isn't Piotr's nickname Colossus? Why Magician?"
Yukio also looked curious.
Deadpool ignored Colossus's warning glare.
"Hi~ Eve. I'm Deadpool. Wade. Good brother."
"Hello, Wade," Eve replied politely.
"As for Magician," Wade continued, "have you heard this legend? If a man remains single until thirty…"
He paused dramatically.
"…he gains magical powers."
Yukio and Eve both snorted.
Yukio quickly covered her mouth.
Colossus glared murderously.
Deadpool pointed at Eve.
"See? I made her laugh. She's happy."
"Sorry, Eve," Colossus said stiffly. "I need to take this guy back to the academy first. Next time. Next time I'll spend proper time with you."
Deadpool's head snapped up.
"Next time? Do you know the two biggest lies in the world? First: 'I love you.' Second: 'Definitely next time.'"
"Shut up, Wade!"
Colossus's voice boomed.
"I simply do not want her exposed to you."
Deadpool gasped.
"So you want the Golden House Hidden Lover—Academy Edition? I refuse to be a secret third party. I demand legitimacy."
Bang!
Colossus punched him cleanly.
Instant silence.
He lifted the limp Wade by the back of his collar.
Then looked awkwardly at Eve.
"Would you… like to visit the academy sometime?"
"Of course," Eve smiled warmly. "But not today. Handle Wade first."
Deadpool, apparently unconscious, suddenly raised his head and winked at Eve.
She burst out laughing again.
Colossus looked down.
Deadpool had already slumped back into a dramatic heap.
"…Then goodbye?" Colossus offered.
"Goodbye."
---
As Colossus dragged Wade toward the exit, Deadpool whispered faintly:
"Hey, Piotr…"
Silence.
"…You might've lost the Magician title tonight."
Colossus's metal jaw tightened.
Deadpool grinned weakly.
"…But your life? Truly worthwhile."
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