REN
I can feel the weight of my eyes as they go hooded. There's a strong pull when I stare at Kyo, especially from this close. His lips, always fucking pouted in that cute way, are mere inches away from mine.
We've been filming our recent project called "With You, Always," which airs in a few weeks, but this would be the first time Kyo and I would share a kiss on-screen. Well, actually, ever. I'm embarrassed to admit that when I read the script, I practically beamed and giggled pathetically at the revelation.
I, Ren Vachirawit, will kiss P'Kyo.
It made me jealous of my future-self.
"CUT!" the director shouts out before our lips can touch. Kyo backs away slowly, shifting from his spot on the couch to face the director, nodding his head as he takes in new instruction. My gaze follows the movement of Kyo, falling to his lips for a split second of frustration.
I met P'Kyo for the first time at N.C.P., an event that DYTV, our television production company, holds every year to form new company pairings for future projects in the industry. He was new, while I'd been in the company a year prior. I never met anybody the previous year at N.C.P. that stood out to me and I really started to doubt myself.
How could I get myself out there if I couldn't even find a partner to work with?
But then I met P'Kyo Krit. He's two years older than me but it didn't feel uncomfortable. His black hair fanned slightly over his forehead with a smile that could've melted an iceberg. His features are soft, which is probably why I didn't feel the intimidation I experienced with the others. Our first conversation was about what we enjoyed about acting and what we valued, but it felt as if we could talk about anything. It didn't matter what. I knew that I was choosing him to be my partner.
"It's hot in here, isn't it?" I feel him say near my face, his hands back to gripping my biceps for the scene, slapping me out of my reverie. I glance at him above me, his eyes sparkling.
A cheeky smile breaks free from my face when I tease, "You sure it's not because you're shy to kiss me?"
The both of us laugh off our banter, while the camera-crew gasps in surprise, their cheeks flushing. They should be used to it by now. We've always taunted each other with empty, flirtatious jokes, although I can't deny that there are some truths behind my remarks.
I didn't always have a crush on Kyo. We both used to be shy around each other, but over these past two years, we've grown more comfortable and I feel that I've matured through him. I think it's made me more bold and aware of my feelings, but that's all it can ever be—my repressed feelings.
Every fan-service we do, I break off one more fragment of my heart to the press and disguise it as a joke that Kyo and I can laugh off. I can't read him, but I know this is one-sided. If I were to confess, it would ruin the relationship that we have now. The chemistry that the fans love. The partnership our company badly wants to cherish. So I'll swallow my pride.
His lips meet mine suddenly with a quick peck before pulling away slowly. I clear the fog in my head, rendering what my script said. I stare into his eyes longingly before inching closer. I capture his lips, one of my hands falling to hold the back of his head, while the other tightens on his waist. I hear the camera lens focusing through one ear, but my other ear is consumed by only the thundering of my heart.
I pull myself away, taking in a sharp breath, as production claps at the finished clip. My eyes flick up to Kyo, who's not paying them any attention, and instead, is looking from my right to my left eye, his plump lips parted. I send him a comforting smile and he smiles back before glancing away, breaking me from that trance.
"Let's call it a day," our manager, Win, declares to production, handing both Kyo and I a bottle of water.
My brows furrow. I've never bothered to go out and buy myself a watch, so I reach for Kyo's hand beside me, bending his arm so that I can read the time on his wrist. I tilt my head at Win when I get a read on it only being four o'clock. "Why so early?"
"You two..." he drawls out, popping a piece of gum in his mouth, "...have fan-meetings scheduled today."
This time, it's Kyo who looks confused. He turns to me and I shrug. "We do?"
Win chuckles. "Don't look so scared. You two didn't forget. It was just scheduled this morning and I forgot to let you know." He nods to one of the men on camera-crew who pats us on the shoulders with affirmation as he walks past. "It's just regular fan-service. A teaser for 'With You, Always' was released last week, so try to make references to it for promo."
I exhale heavily. More fan-service. We're good at that.
Good at flirting and getting fans' hopes up.
"Ren!!" a fan squeals in front of the table Kyo and I now sit at for the fan-meets, a line piling up behind her. "You really do look like a dog!" She's wearing an oversized black shirt with white lettering that writes, 'I heart RenKyo.' I smile brightly at that.
"Does he?" Kyo questions, his lips pulling up into a teasing smile as he looks towards me. "I think he's more like a puppy." The joke is old but our fans have made it a permanent thing. Kyo made the mistake of ruffling my hair on a LIVE one time and calling me a clingy dog. Now, fans use my light brown hair and extrovert personality to compare me to a golden retriever. I don't think I'll ever escape the title.
Kyo's hand is suddenly patting my head jokingly, as he did in the LIVE that started this whole mess, and I frown. What kind of act of fan-service is this?
"Ren," the fan starts as Kyo's hand falls away from my hair, "How does it feel when P'Kyo flirts with you?"
I snicker, stealing a glance in Kyo's direction when I decide to indulge in the fan-service our manager wants from us. "I feel struck," I say with a smile, noting the baffled expression on Kyo's face as I talk. "Today, we filmed a scene for our show and when we were sitting together, there was a moment where I just paused and all I could think was 'he's so cute.'"
Kyo's flustered smile grows, his head turning to look at me. He doesn't even know that I'm saying this for real. It's not a ploy to capture the fans' hearts. It's a piece of my own heart.
The fan's eyes go wide with excitement. "You thought he was cute? Have you fallen for him?"
I don't even think before I speak. "I fell for him just like our characters in 'With You, Always.'"
Kyo's hand raises to cover his face as he shyly laughs. He really does look cute.
When the fan leaves with our autographs, Kyo leans in to whisper to me before the next fan arrives in front of us. "That was really good."
I glance at him curiously. "What was?"
"You mentioned our show into the fan-service like Win wanted us to. I had no idea how we were going to do that." His teeth flash the cutest smile, even as my heart drops. "You're a natural."
I smile back an inch, another piece of my heart cracking under the impression that I said it for fan-service.
This is just how it's meant to be.