Chapter 73: Interlude
"Daughter... I did not raise you this way."
Rowena looked in the direction the young man had gone. Unfortunately, because of the angle at which her portrait hung, she couldn't see exactly where he had gone, but from the sound of the door, it was clear that she and her daughter were now alone.
"Mother."
Helena was lost, guilt written plainly across her ghostly face, along with a stubborn thread of pride.
"Daughter, why didn't you tell him before the ritual?"
"He might have refused. And I... I needed..."
Ghostly tears ran down the ghostly face.
"...I owe you such an apology."
Helena's ghost sank to her knees before her mother's portrait. Even knowing that what looked back at her was merely the imprint of an imprint, a copy of a soul and a personality, it made the conversation no less real. She herself was no longer the girl who had run away. She was a shadow of what she had been, bound to this world by nothing but guilt.
"Daughter, what is all this? I may not remember much yet, but believe me, there is nothing you could have done that would change how much I love you."
Rowena spoke quietly, and there was real sincerity in it, alongside a certain awkwardness. She was aware that these words might sound strange coming from her. In life, she had been rather sparing with them. But she was a portrait now, just a portrait, and perhaps that meant she could try, at last, to be honest and open about what she felt.
"Mother!"
Helena wept harder. She had wanted to hear those words so desperately, with everything she had left of a heart, and she had been terrified she never would. That her mother would look at her coldly and name her a thief.
"There, there, my darling. Could you perhaps call a house-elf and have them hang me on the wall in here? I think we could both do with a proper talk."
"I... yes."
Helena let out several unsteady little sobs, then vanished through the floor. She didn't have nearly enough magic for a house-elf to hear her directly, so she went straight to the kitchens and appealed to the elder of the community for help. The elf did not refuse. It was true that a ghost could not share magic with a house-elf, but Helena had always been courteous to them, and hanging a portrait on a wall was no great matter.
The elf helped without a second thought.
"Mother."
When the portrait was on the wall, Helena hovered before it with her head bowed in guilt.
"Now then, daughter. That young man told me my memories would return, but I would like to know what happened in our lives and in yours, from your perspective. My own, as he said, I would eventually recover."
"Well..."
Several hours later.
"Daughter, really."
Rowena looked at her daughter with tender eyes. How she wished she could embrace her, but she was only a portrait. And having heard the whole of her daughter's story...
She wanted to say a thousand words of gratitude to this Black, for giving her the chance to speak with her daughter again. And she wanted to wring his neck for leaving her so helpless and unable to hold the girl who was her own blood.
"I won't pretend I'm pleased to hear you stole the diadem. But do you truly imagine a thing like that changes how I feel about you?"
"Mother..."
"Daughter, I forgive you."
Helena flinched at the words.
"...I am certain that even when I remember everything as it appeared from my own side, I will not be angry with you. Perhaps I was, in those first days. I don't remember. What I do remember is that I was never able to stay angry with you for long. So I forgive you."
"Thank you."
Helena let out a shuddering sob and wept openly before her mother's portrait. She had wanted to hear those words. She had hoped for them and despaired of ever receiving them, all at once.
"Now then, my darling."
About twenty minutes later, when Helena had finally quieted, Rowena turned to the matter at hand.
"Tell me who this boy is. And then explain to me why you didn't warn him that the diadem was no longer where you knew it to be."
"I was afraid."
Helena sighed and began again while Rowena listened. She understood what she was hearing. Her daughter had been deceived once before, and she had come to believe that trust was something she could no longer afford. That was why she had said nothing. Rowena could have said a great deal about how wrong her daughter had been. But she did not want a quarrel, and she did not want to break what had barely been rebuilt. She had been alive once, and she had failed to notice her daughter drifting away from her. She was not going to consider herself too clever to make the same mistake twice.
"Daughter, I... cannot say I support your decision."
Helena looked down.
"But I understand it. What we need to decide now is what to do next."
"Mother..."
Her voice was small and heavy with guilt.
"Daughter, we need to put this right. Mr. Black helped us, and now we must think about how to help him in return, or at least repay the debt."
"Yes. But what can we offer?"
"To begin with, go to him. Ask to speak with him."
"All right."
Helena departed, reluctant as she was. She had no wish to face Draco. She felt guilty, because she had, in effect, deceived him. But she had been alive, or rather, she had existed, for a very long time, and she understood well enough that what she had done was wrong.
"Draco."
Helena emerged through the wall directly in front of the spot where the boy was sitting. He did not acknowledge her.
"Draco... I am sorry."
Again, nothing. Penny could see her, of course, but she had decided to stay out of it and simply watch. Helena was not pleased about that at the moment. She would have welcomed help from the Head Girl, but she understood it was unlikely to come unless she asked directly.
"Draco."
Helena shook her head. She wasn't going to reach him on her own.
"Penelope, might I ask for your help? I am truly sorry for betraying Mr. Black's trust. I would like to make amends, but he doesn't seem to want to hear me."
"I'm sorry, Lady Ravenclaw, but if I must choose between you and Draco, I choose Draco."
"I'm not asking you to choose. I'm simply asking you to help me make amends to him."
But the Head Girl shook her head, to Helena's surprise.
"Forgive me, Lady Ravenclaw, but I won't intervene. This is between the two of you. I'm sure Draco will cool down in time and you'll be able to speak with him. For now..."
She shrugged. Helena sighed and slipped back through the wall, emerging a few minutes later in the Room of Requirement, before her mother's portrait.
"Well?"
"He's ignoring me."
"And the girl? I couldn't see her, of course, but I could hear her voice perfectly well. And the fact that Mr. Black spoke openly about the soul fragments in her presence suggests a very high degree of trust."
"She refused to take my side. She said I should wait for Draco to calm down and then speak to him."
"Hmm."
Rowena shook her head.
"That is not good. I doubt he will cool down quickly, and even when he does, the trust between you will already be damaged. And I have no wish to remain indebted to someone who might be in a position to help me."
"Help you?"
"Yes. This state of affairs..."
Rowena spread her hands.
"...is somewhat limiting. I would very much like to discuss his ritual with him, and then, with his help, refine it so I might gain a ghostly form like yours."
Helena bit her lower lip, realizing that by her actions she might have driven away the very person who could help with this.
"But wait. There's the Headmaster!"
"The Headmaster?"
Rowena looked at her daughter with mild skepticism.
"But you never went to him for help yourself. There must have been a reason. Mustn't there?"
"Yes."
"There, you see. And what's more, Mr. Black performed the ritual here rather than in the castle's ritual chamber, which means he doesn't trust the Headmaster either."
"Well..."
"What is it?"
Rowena noticed the hesitation in her daughter's expression, though not its cause.
"The ritual chamber has been closed for a long time. The curriculum taught in this castle has been drastically reduced compared to when you and the other Founders governed it. Some subjects were removed because the knowledge was declared illegal, but that's not all."
"What the hell?!"
Rowena erupted, flinging her arms wide. Fury filled her instantly and demanded release.
"What sort of damned law?! The castle is extraterritorial! No one has the right to dictate what is taught here!"
"That hasn't been true for quite some time."
Helena shook her head.
"There have been many wars since then: two world wars, conflicts between wizards. They all wore away at the enchantments you placed on the castle. Outside wizards were brought in to preserve it, wizards who answered first to the Council of Lords and then to the Ministry of Magic. The Headmaster still wields considerable authority here, but..."
Helena looked at her mother, who appeared ready to commit violence, and wished she could say anything other than what she was about to say.
"...the castle is no longer extraterritorial. The Ministry has a strong influence over the curriculum."
"We could have sacrificed a couple of hundred slaves!"
"Mother, there have been no slaves for a hundred years or more. I can't say exactly..."
"What do you mean, no slaves?"
Rowena ran into that particular wall with visible force.
"Wait. That's not the point."
She shook her head sharply.
"No slaves. Fine. There are magical creatures to sacrifice instead. Harpies, dragons, any number of things! The enchantments we cast would have renewed themselves!"
"Mother."
"Wait."
Rowena held up a hand, silencing her daughter.
"A moment. I need to calm myself."
She began taking slow, deliberate breaths, entirely unnecessary for a portrait, but effective on a purely psychological level.
"I understand that the castle's extraterritoriality would have been inconvenient for the Lords and utterly unacceptable to this Ministry. I do understand that. But knowledge... A school is the one place where people should be able to learn from the mistakes of the past."
Helena watched her mother and felt a familiar envy. She had always marveled at how quickly her mother could ignite, and how quickly she could settle. Not that Helena herself hadn't developed something similar over her long years of existence, but still.
"Daughter, we very much need Mr. Black's help."
"Mother, perhaps we should consider going to the Headmaster instead?"
"And what would he do for us?"
There was a wry edge to Rowena's voice.
"Destroy the portrait?"
"No!"
Helena shook her head.
"The Headmaster values knowledge above almost everything. He would relish the chance to speak with someone as... well. He wouldn't refuse to help. We simply need to think carefully about what to tell him, and how."
"All right, daughter. Let's do this. Tell me everything you know about the current Headmaster, and then we'll decide together whether to trust him or try again with Mr. Black."
"All right."
Helena nodded, gathered her thoughts, and began. She told her mother everything she knew: his school years, what sort of teacher he had been, what he now did for the castle. But the longer she spoke, the more clearly she understood: her mother would never trust this man.
It wasn't that the Headmaster's record was especially dark. It wasn't. He had his failings, as any thinking creature did, but too many of his decisions and choices were, at the very least, questionable. If Helena could see it and understand it, her mother would see it ten times more clearly. And the number of questions that would arise in her mind would make genuine trust impossible.
"No, daughter."
Rowena shook her head, and there was real regret in her voice.
"Forgive me for not deferring to you, but there are simply too many questions I would have about this man to place my trust in him."
"I understand. I was telling you about him and realized that you'd find too much to question."
"Which means it comes back to Mr. Black. We wait for him to cool down, approach him again, and by then decide how to repay him for what he has already done."
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4.Harry Potter: Reborn as Draco Black = CHAPTER 125
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