In the silence, Ren remained beside the girl, her fingers interlocked with his.
Before Eva finally spoke, voice thin and trembling. "I…forgot who I was." She tilted her head to face Ren, eyes still sealed shut. "I was ready to leave it all behind. Ready to forget everything."
Ren swallowed down the cursed thoughts. "Yeah…I know the feeling."
"Then, she must have reached you too?"
Ren gave a weak nod. "There was a moment. Not too long ago, after one of the times I—" He stopped, exhaling through his nose. "After I died…I woke up again in my own blood. And in that moment…I forgot where I was. Couldn't remember my name. Just this thought in my head." His voice dropped lower. "That it would've been easier if I just stayed lost…'
"It's her…" Eva acknowledged. "That's how she sounds."
"I see…" Ren lifted his gaze to the crimson sky overhead.
"She knew I was tired," Eva whispered, adding on with her own experience. "That I'd earned rest. That no one would be angry if I gave in." Her voice wavered. "But it wasn't rest…Was it?"
Both of them seemed to know the answer to that question.
Ren looked down at his hands—blood-smeared, caked with dirt and ash.
"I wonder…if I'm still me."
"Ren?" Eva questioned, testing his name. "Are you…scared you've changed?"
"…No," Ren responded. "I think…I think I'm scared I haven't changed enough…"
Eva lowered her gaze, her lips trembling when she admitted. "I still want it…Even now. I know it's wrong, but I can't help wanting this all to end."
"…Yeah, I understand. But I don't think it's wrong to want rest." Ren shut his eyes, the warmth of the illusion coming back to him. The kids. The parents. The comfort. "...It was peaceful."
"But…I'm afraid. That if I go back…I won't come out again." She hesitated, gathering what little courage she had left. "If that were to happen. And I give in…will you pull me back out again?"
He stared at the dirt beneath their joined hands, at the way her fingers trembled faintly against his own. She was depending on him. Since he came to this world, he'd been all alone. He died. Regenerated. Endured. If he broke, then it ended with him. But it's different now. He's not alone.
"I don't know if I'm strong enough," He said in a quiet tone. "I mess up. A lot. But…I know what it feels like to want to disappear. And I know what it feels like when someone doesn't come back for you. So if you start to slip…" Ren continued, voice steadier. "I won't let you face it alone."
Her gaze shot up to him, closed eyes still finding a way to search his expression.
"I can't promise I'll always know what to do," Ren added. "Or that I won't be scared."
He paused as he gathered himself.
"But I won't leave."
The faintest sign of a smile came over Eva, as he fingers tightened around his.
"Then…I'll do the same for you."
In that moment, Ren didn't feel like the broken boy held together by grief and stubborn resolve.
For the first time in a long time. He felt seen.
"I'm going to kill her," Ren said. "I don't care how many times it takes."
Eva stiffened beside him. "…Her?" She asked carefully. "You mean…'The Mother'?"
'So that's her name…' Ren thought.
"No one thinks of killing her," She pleaded to Ren. "She isn't…something you can fight. She's always been here. She's above us all…Souls can never escape her. And neither will you..."
"I don't care…" Ren said. "I've been through pain. I've died and I've come back to just die again. And I've decided…that this is what I am going to do…I'll kill The Mother with my own hands…"
Eva shook her head in disbelief. "You really think you can just…keep getting back up? Forever?"
"I don't. No…" Ren admitted. "I think it'll break me eventually. But if that happens…then at least I'll know I tried, right? At least it won't end with me doing nothing…"
"Then, you should know…" Eva said in an almost whisper. "Where she may reside."
"You know where she is?" Ren asked.
"No. Not exactly." Eva admitted under her breath. "It was fleeting. I was…inside her shadow, or she was inside me. I'm not sure. But I saw a place. A building. A chapel…Empty…Cold stone walls. I didn't know what it was at the time. But I think…that's where she might be."
"A chapel?" Ren looked over to the steed.
"I believe so. I only saw it once, so it's vague. But I think…if we find it…we might find her."
Ren inhaled, letting the weight of her words settle. It wasn't a promise, nor was it even close. But it was something—something solid they could act on. Something they could hold onto together. He looked at Eva, at the faint lines of exhaustion and fear on her face. He was no longer a soul wandering through an endless torment alone. He had someone beside him.
Someone who had trust in him.
"Then that's where we go." Ren stood, offering his hand to Eva. "Together…"
She hesitated for a moment, before holding her hand for Ren to grab.
The steed stepped forward before Ren called to it, lowering its head to them.
Ren helped Eva onto its back, then climbed behind her, one arm wrapped securely around her as the steed began to stride.
The forest parted as they passed—trees with bark peeled like wounds, stone pillars swallowed by moss, ruins that looked like they had tried to stand against something for far too long.
"She's close," Eva whispered, voice trembling but firm.
Ren had felt it too.
Something in the air had thickened.
And it came into view.
A chapel stood intact, stone walls unbroken and well-kept. The spire pierced the crimson sky. The walls were lined with grey brick. And the massive doors remained untouched by the time.
'This must be it…' Ren thought. 'It has to be.'
SLUSH
"Come back! Come back! Mommy! Me want food!"
The sound caught their attention.
SLOOSH
"Really...food just for me?!" It spoke out, almost like it was talking to someone.
From the corner of the building, the creature emerged.
That slug-like beast from the cave.
Just as grotesque as before. A massive, lurching creature of mixed flesh, dragging itself forward with twitching appendages. It wheezed out, like an infant trying to cry through a broken throat.
"Mommy said I could have you!" It squealed out. "She said…she said me been good!"
There was no backing down now. Ren slid off the steed, and walked toward the creature.
"Ren?" Eva asked from the steed's back. "What are you doing?"
He stepped forward, pulling his makeshift dagger out. "Mother…I know you're watching me."
His gaze was locked on the horror slithering to him. It was the same uncanny sight that he remembered, the ribs split open and curling outward like some horrible blooming flower. It dragged its malformed body closer, long limbs scraping ruts into the grass as it approached.
'I know you've been listening this entire time.' Ren said inside his mind, as The Mother could hear his own thoughts. 'So, listen to me when I say this…I'm going to destroy this abomination. And once I'm done here. I'm coming for you…'