Bright and early, the real trial started. Aaron and Kale did not want me at the bench for the trial and got permission from the judge for me not be up there with them while they were asking him questions. He agreed, but still wanted me in the courtroom. I was at the very back, dressed nicely and ready just in case I needed to be brought forward. A hand touched mine. I jumped before seeing Kane sit down next to me. I gripped his hand, hoping that the judge ruled in my favor.
The jury was listening to everything going on between Kale, who was taking the lead as my lawyer, and my ex. Kale was ripping him a new asshole in legal jargon while my ex was getting more and more pissed off at him. My ex did not think this out. He thought he was going to win. He is now not winning and may go to prison for attempted murder in the first degree.
I was watching the man who tortured me for years get his ass handed to him. I felt my arm grabbed and gently pulled. I looked over at Kane. He wanted me to slip out into the hallway with him. I stood up with him, and he put me in front of him so I could not see behind me. The security guard let us out and closed the door behind us. I turned around and wrapped my arms around him tightly. He kissed the top of my head.
"Breathe, baby. You need to breathe." He said. "Inhale." I felt like I could not catch my breath. He walked a little way from the door with me still in his arms. He cupped my face in his hands to make me look at him. "Breathe, baby. It's ok." I could feel my body trying to catch my breath. "Focus on me, baby." I could feel his chest rise and fall with how close we were to each other. "Shhh. It's ok. The worst part is over. Focus on breathing, baby." I was still trying. "Breathe with me, baby."
I was getting closer to breathing. "Shhh. We're almost there. Keep breathing for me." He said. I took a deep, shaky breath. "One more time, baby." I took another shaky breath. "One more time." I took another breath, less shaky than the second one. "Its ok, baby. He's not going to be able to harm you again. Not while I'm alive. And not while your family is alive." He said. I finally took a well-needed deep breath. "Do you want to go back in there?" He asked. "No," I answered.
"Ok. We do not have to go back in there until you are ready. Ok?" I nodded. He sat me down on the bench and let me lean into him. He held me close and rubbed my back. I sighed as he held me. He kissed my forehead again. I wanted out of this building and away from him.
My ex's father was the real parent who did not want me over at their house and kept his foot down on the case. I knew his father was in that courtroom. I wanted out of that room for not just my safety but also for my family members. He held me tightly to his body while we were on the bench. The doors opened, and I caught myself trying to go back into the panic attack. I took a deep, shaky breath. "Are you ok?" Kane asked. "Yeah. I'm ok." I said as people started filtering out. "I think they are taking a break before delivering the verdict." He said.
"I'm going to go to the restroom before going back in," I said. "Ok, love." He said. I went into the bathroom to use it before I washed my hands and splashed cold water on my face. I exited the bathroom before going back to Kane. He wrapped me in his arms and held me close to his body. "I will not let him get close to you, baby. You have done everything you can. He will not touch you." He said. I didn't want to leave his arms.
"I'm right here." I sighed into his chest. He kissed my forehead and the top of my head. "Do you want to hear if he is going to prison and if he is, how long?" Kane asked. "Yeah," I answered. He stood up, holding onto me. We walked back in and sat down. My family was sitting in the front of the courtroom and didn't even know I was in the very back; they thought I was in a room away from the courtroom. I wrapped my arms around his waist and rested my head on his shoulder.
My ex was not allowed to look at the audience at all. The jury came back in then the judge. The Clerk of the jury stood up. "We unanimously find the defendant guilty of attempted murder in the second degree." "I'll agree to that. Mr. Jacobs, you are found guilty in the second degree of attempted murder. You will serve five years at the TDCJ James Lynaugh Unit for your crimes. When you are released, you will not be in the military anymore, and there will be a lifetime restraining order against you. You will not be allowed to come within one hundred yards of Ms. Ray or her family for the rest of your God-given life. This court is adjourned. I hope God has no mercy on your soul." The judge said before leaving the bench.
Kane hid me from my ex as the officers and deputies led him out. I have five years of peace.