I woke slowly, the light from my window stinging my eyes. A small warm body was pressed against me. I opened my eyes to see Mira fast asleep, lying on my outstretched arm.
She had a huge bruise covering one eye; the molten purple skin was deep and looked fresh. I frowned, brushing my hand gently over it, trying not to wake her.
Warmth filled my fingers, seeping into her skin, erasing the bruises, like they had never been there. She sighed in her sleep, rolling away from me. Guilt filled my stomach like lead, the uncomfortable sensation lodging there threatening to make me sick.
I gently eased out from under her, tucking the blanket more firmly around her. Cinder sat in the corner of the room, arms crossed over his chest, head leaning against the wall. He looked so peaceful like that, not the chaotic storm that I knew him to be. At peace, he looked a lot younger and a lot less terrifying.
I blew out a breath, wincing as the bed creaked, and his head jerked up, startled. I put a finger to my lips to quiet him. He nodded and followed me out into the hall.
"How long was I out?" I asked, easing the door shut.
"Not long, through the night. You passed out on us, not that anyone can blame you after performing miracles," he sighed, tucking some hair behind my ear. "You scared the shit out of me. I was afraid…"
He didn't finish his sentence, but I knew what he meant. That I had died like my mother had. Surprisingly, I felt just fine, better than normal in fact, almost energized.
"Where is he?" I asked, looking around the empty shop.
"Speaking with the elders. Miss May asked him to explain. It was all we could do to keep people from running off with you while you were passed out. Everyone is terrified of losing you," he said, following me into the empty living room.
"My gift, you mean, they couldn't care less about me," I said, rolling my eyes at him.
"They didn't give the Alpha your name, and he offered a hundred gold. Not one person told him a thing."
I stopped walking to look at him, frowning. It warmed something in my chest to hear it, but I also knew they kept quiet so as not to be seen as a narc; that was a good way to wind up dead around here. Still, I was grateful.
"I want to see the sick, let's start with the kids," I said, pushing out into the streets.
"Is that a good idea? You just woke up."
"I only have three days, Cinder. I need to see as many people as I can."
"You know they aren't going to want to let you go. No one is," he sighed, rubbing the back of his neck.
I kept walking, letting him trail behind me like a dog. Plans sprang to my mind, only to be dismissed immediately. Staying here would get people killed, maybe everyone. The Alpha wouldn't just let me go. He would be back and with more men.
That pushed the timeline up. I had to heal everyone in one day so I could run. Cure a hundred some odd people from a life-threatening illness, sure, no sweat. What a laugh.
⋆···✦···⋆
By the fifteenth house, I was starting to think it would be possible. By the fifty-first, I was scared. This was easier than it should have been. My mother could not use her gift even close to this much, needing to save it for the most dire of circumstances. By the last house, word had spread to every corner of the Outskirts. Hundreds of people swarmed, all trying to get one touch in. Every one of them pulled the magic right out of me; I barely had to do anything.
I had no control over it, an unsettling feeling. It made my skin crawl to think about what would happen if word spread, and it would. Dread was heavy in my stomach as people exclaimed, calling me, "A gift from Selunea."
Cinder was an ever-present shadow behind me, growing more uneasy with every passing moment. The other gangs also started to circle me, keeping the crowds from trampling me, using their bodies as a shield.
Even the Fangshades helped keep me safe, despite being weaker than the others. It brought tears to my eyes.
"Lilliah," Quill said, pulling me into a tight hug that made Cinder growl like a rabid dog, "I was so worried. Don't overdo it, we've got some antibiotics ready too if we need them."
"Save them for when I am gone," I told him, pulling out of his embrace before Cinder ripped him in half.
Quill frowned down at me. His face fell, tears springing to his eyes. He wiped them away hastily, turning his back on me. I patted him gently.
"Everything will be alright," I told him, trying to fight annoyance. I was getting grumpy. I wasn't used to this sort of attention. It was getting on my last nerve.
I felt jittery, almost buzzing under my skin. The more power I used, the more it demanded. I wasn't using it fast enough. It wanted out.
I met Cinder's eye, and he frowned, sensing that something was wrong. I reached through the wall of muscled wolves around me, touching anyone I could, trying to use it before it burned me alive.
People eagerly took what I had to give, spreading the word, and the crowd grew until nearly every person in the Outskirt was crowded around us.
"Lilliah!" Miss May called to me, trying to push through the crowd. She sounded frantic. My heart pounded in fear as I tried to make my way to her. What if something happened to my dad? What if someone was badly hurt and I was stuck, unable to reach them?
Cinder jumped up on a car, letting out an ear-piercing howl that silenced the raging crowd. "Make room!"
They listened, obeying at once, parting for Miss May. She ran to me, gripping my arms, studying my face.
"This is bad," she said, staring into my eyes.
"What is? What is wrong?" I begged, fear gripping my stomach.
"You are overflowing. It happens sometimes with new gifts. The longer it is suppressed, the worse it is when it manifests. If you don't stop now, you might kill yourself."
I frowned at the hundreds of people around me, desperate for help. Her hold on my arms tightened, shaking me. I hugged her tightly, feeling my magic soak into her. She tried to pull away, but I didn't let go until I felt it stop.
"I can't. We both know I can't stop. Please, take care of my father," I whispered, quiet enough that no one else could hear.
I gave her a gentle push and let the crowd swarm around me, blocking me from the gangs that were acting as my guards. Cinder cried out, trying to claw his way through the swarm of bodies to reach me, but I was too far gone.
My hands shook as people pressed against me, taking what they needed. It felt good. Why did it feel so good? My hands shook, my heart started to slow, but every step I took was the most powerful I had ever felt.
I stumbled, and the hands reached out, holding me upright. Steadying me as I gave them all I had. I was going to die. I knew in my soul that if I kept going, I would die.
There was a sudden jerk through my body. Someone had grabbed me, shielding me from those reaching for me. I looked up, meeting my father's eyes for the first time in over a decade.
"Your mother wouldn't want this. Please, Lilliah, don't make me lose you, too," he said, loud in the hush that had fallen over the crowd.
Not only was he here, but he was walking on legs that should have been long gone. The realization stole my breath. I clung to him, burying my face in his chest.
He led me through the crowd, now quiet in shock. Cinder reached us, guarding my other side, as May cursed me all the way back to her home.
I could barely hear her through my shock. What had I done? There was no way this wouldn't spread. People would come hunting me. Bad people that we couldn't fight. The Alpha was bad enough, but there were worse things out there waiting to pounce.
I glanced up at Cinder. His furious eyes met mine, and I knew if I ran, he would follow. They all would. I had to try. Staying here wasn't just dangerous to me. The other gang leaders were staring at me like they had never seen me before. Even Quill looked contemplative, like he was making plans that had nothing to do with what I wanted.
To make matters worse, the Elders waited outside of Miss May's house, staring at me like I owed them.
"We have come to discuss how to proceed," the eldest, Serah Nightwind, said, watching me with interest.
Despite her age being somewhere in the hundreds, her eyes were sharp, catching everything I did. Considering she was blind, it was quite the feat.
"Are you here for healing?" I asked her bluntly, voice cracking with exhaustion as my magic finally started to settle. Leaving me exhausted and unable to walk unaided.
"Goodness no, I would rather see what the goddess wills of me than the mess around this shithole."
I snorted in amusement and pushed on to the house. The Elders followed, ranging in expression from delighted to annoyed to wary. I sank into an offered chair, feeling like I was going to pass out.
"Well? What do you want then?" I asked, not bothering to keep the frustration out of my voice.
Drevan Hollowstep frowned at me, his eyes snapping with hostility. "You cause all these problems, then have the nerve to take that tone of voice with us, young lady?"
I sneered at him, patience long gone for the day, "Oh sure, like I wanted any of this to happen."
"You did get what you wanted, though, did you not?" Serah asked, sounding amused still.
I frowned at her. It was true that I spent my entire life wishing for this gift, but not like this.
She didn't seem to need me to answer. "We wanted to know what your plan was."
Cinder stepped forward, placing a hand protectively on my shoulder, his earlier anger forgotten. "Lilliah is not the council's concern. You have never bothered to aid her before this; she owes you nothing now."
"Not true, we have struck her name from all census records for years now. We protected her from the Collectors and made sure to work with her in a crisis," Garron, the youngest of the elders, said, his sharp blue eyes seeming to look right through me to my soul.
They did all of that for me? I did find it strange that I never had to pay the tax everyone else had to. I figured it was because I wasn't actually making anything.
"I do appreciate all that you have done for me, but I need to know what you expect," I said, trying to calm my unease.
"When the Alpha comes for you. We want you to go willingly," Drevan said bluntly, staring at me like I was nothing but trouble for him—a misbehaving child, and not the one who was on the line to be sacrificed.
"I don't agree with that," Miss May snapped, putting a hand on my shoulder.
"Nor do I, Lilliah is one of us. We don't give up our own," Cinder spat, opening and closing his fists. A snarl twisted his lips, making him look feral, dangerous.
"Think for a moment, if he comes here for her and we keep her from him, all of us will pay the price," Garron said, sounding sad, like it was the last thing he wanted.
My father stepped forward, placing a hand protectively on my shoulder. "We will do what Lilliah wants. This is her choice alone."
"That isn't a luxury we have. He will bring an army of men. They will march down here and take her by force, and kill anyone in their way," Drevan snapped.
"What if I left?" I asked, and the bickering stopped as they studied me. "You could claim that I left of my own accord. Say that I ran off in the middle of the night."
"There is a chance we will still be blamed," Garron pointed out calmly.
"Lilliah deserves our protection. We should fight for her," Cinder snapped, pointing a finger at Garron's chest.
"And how many people will die for her? How many people will be slain for just standing in the way? Think pup. We can't let one woman destroy us all," Drevan snapped at him, eyes wide with fear.
Miss May stepped forward, pulling Cinder gently away, whispering to him.
"Can I have some time to think it over?" I asked, taking a deep breath, trying to calm my screaming nerves. My voice shook, and I hated the tears springing to my eyes.
Damn him. Damn that man for putting me in this position. I never wanted to strike someone more in my life. The Alpha was a monster, but this was too far.
"There are only two days left. We need an answer," Serah said, her voice calm. The pity in her voice stung.
I didn't blame them. Not really. This wasn't an easy choice to make. They had to think of the Outskirt as a whole.
"I understand, I will get you an answer soon," I said, voice calmer than I felt.
The two men exchanged a look and nodded. Miss May led them out, closing the door behind them. I could see the crowd of people still pressed around the house. Waiting for me, their eager faces searching.
"Lilliah," Cinder said, kneeling before me, blocking them from view. "Please let us help you. I can…"
Shaking my head, I got up. "I would like a minute alone with my father."
Cinder's face fell. He knew what I was planning. Wrapping himself around me, he pressed his lips to my cheek and whispered, "I can't let you do this. You know I can't."
I ducked under his arm and gave him a sad smile. "You can try."
May grabbed him by the arm, frowning at me, but didn't say anything. She knew what I was going to do, and if I knew her, she would be on my side, even if she didn't agree.
Dad sighed and sank into the chair across from me. "Is that what you want? To run?"
I nodded. "It is the only way I can keep everyone safe, and still hold on to myself."
Tears leaked slowly down his cheeks. "Then I will do everything I can to help you."