Chapter 32
I Couldn't Stay Away
(Jay's POV)
I tried not to think about it.
I really did.
But I couldn't.
Because today…
Was his birthday.
Every year…
I was the first one.
"Happy birthday."
Midnight.
Call.
Message.
Sometimes both.
And he would tease—
"First as always."
"Obviously."
"Obsessed."
"Shut up."
And he would laugh.
But this year…
Nothing.
No call.
No message.
No him.
I stared at my phone.
His chat open.
Typing…
Deleting…
Typing again…
Nothing felt right.
Because what right do I even have now?
"Jay, are you okay?"
Ella.
"I'm fine."
"You don't look fine."
"I said I'm fine."
I wasn't.
Not even a little.
He didn't come to college.
Of course he didn't.
Why would he?
What reason does he have now?
But still…
Today felt different.
He shouldn't be alone today.
Not today.
I stood up suddenly.
"Where are you going?" Ella asked.
"I'll come."
"Jay—"
"I'll come."
And I left.
My heart was racing.
Too fast.
Too loud.
Because I knew where I was going.
His house.
"This is wrong…"
I whispered.
But I didn't stop.
Because some things…
Matter more than right or wrong.
I reached.
Stood in front of the gate.
Took a deep breath.
Then rang the bell.
The door opened.
A staff member.
"Yes?"
"I… I want to meet Keifer."
Before he could respond—
"Jay?"
I looked up.
Serina.
Standing there.
Surprised.
Confused.
Behind her—
Keizer.
And…
Kasper.
All looking at me.
My heart skipped.
This was the first time…
I came here.
Like this.
Unannounced.
Unplanned.
Uncontrolled.
"Jay, what are you doing here?" Serina asked.
I swallowed.
Tried to stay calm.
"I… I needed to meet Keifer."
Silence.
Their expressions changed slightly.
Observing.
Questioning.
"For what?" Keizer asked.
My mind went blank.
I couldn't say the truth.
Not here.
Not like this.
"I… I had to talk to him."
"About?"
My fingers tightened.
"College work."
Lie.
Weak one.
But it was all I had.
They didn't fully believe it.
I could see that.
But they didn't stop me either.
"He's upstairs," Serina said slowly.
My heart started beating faster.
"Go."
I nodded.
"Thank you…"
And I walked in.
Every step felt heavy.
This was his world.
His space.
His home.
And I was here.
Like I didn't belong.
But still…
I kept walking.
Because I needed to see him.
Just once.
Even if he pushes me away.
Even if he ignores me.
Even if it hurts.
I reached his door.
Stood there.
Hand on the handle.
Heart in my throat.
"What am I doing…"
But I already knew.
I was going to him.
Even if I had no right to.
I opened the door slowly.
And stepped inside.
And there—
He was.
But not the way I remembered.
To be continued…