The forest smelled like victory and roasted wyvern.
I was lounging on a fallen log the size of a city bus, my juvenile Void Dragon form stretched out lazily under the dappled sunlight filtering through the ancient canopy. My obsidian scales caught the light like polished onyx, throwing tiny rainbows of void energy across the mossy ground. A half-eaten wyvern leg—perfectly charred on the outside, still juicy on the inside—dangled from my claws. I took another massive bite, grease dripping down my chin in the most undignified way possible for an ascendant mythical creature.
[Current Level: 187]
[Attribute Points: ∞]
[Passive Active: Mana Overflow – Local wildlife within 3 km has either evolved or spontaneously combusted. Again.]
Life was good. Too good. I'd spent the morning casually allocating a few casual billion points into Luck just to see what would happen, and now golden fruit was literally falling from the trees around me. One landed in my open mouth. I chewed thoughtfully.
System, you're spoiling me. Keep it up and I might actually start enjoying this reincarnation.
A rustle in the underbrush made my ear frills twitch. I didn't even bother lifting my head. Probably another adventurer party coming to "subjugate the evil dragon" again. They were getting predictable.
Then the air changed.
Holy mana—thick, cloying, and annoyingly righteous—flooded the clearing like someone had cracked open a perfume bottle labeled "Plot Armor: Hero Edition." My Voidflame instincts flared for half a second before I shoved them back down. No need to waste calories on small fry.
A figure stepped into the clearing.
He was tall for a human, maybe 6'2", with that classic isekai protagonist build: messy black hair, sharp jawline, glowing holy sword strapped to his back like it was paying rent. His armor was mid-tier legendary at best—silver plates etched with runes that screamed "I got this from the starter village blacksmith who secretly turned out to be a god." A party of five trailed behind him: tank, healer, mage, archer, and a suspiciously quiet assassin type who kept glancing at the trees like they owed him money.
The leader stopped ten meters away and pointed his glowing sword straight at my snout.
"You're the threat the Goddess of Order warned us about!" he bellowed, voice full of main-character energy. "The Void Dragon who defies the balance of the world! I, Sato Kenji, Hero of Prophecy, have come to deliver justice!"
I blinked slowly, still chewing.
…Sato Kenji?
The name hit me like a TPS report on a Monday morning. Another Japanese reincarnator. Salaryman vibes radiated off him like cheap cologne. I could practically smell the convenience store bentos and all-nighters from his previous life.
I swallowed the last bite of wyvern, licked my claws clean, and tilted my head.
"Bro. I'm literally just trying to vibe. Your goddess needs better hobbies. Also, nice sword. Does it come with Wi-Fi?"
Sato's eyes widened. "You can speak Common?! And… wait, you're Japanese too?!"
The party behind him shifted uncomfortably. The healer whispered something about "demon trickery." The mage was already charging a spell that glowed suspiciously like a basic Fireball but with extra sparkles for drama.
I sighed, a small puff of black smoke escaping my nostrils. "Yeah, yeah. Haruto Takahashi, former corporate slave. Died at my desk. Reborn as this." I gestured at my entire glorious dragon body with one claw. "Infinite stats. Zero responsibilities. You?"
Sato gripped his sword tighter, the blade humming with holy light. "Sato Kenji. Truck-kun got me on my way to work. Goddess gave me the Holy Sword System and the title Hero of Prophecy. I'm supposed to save the world from monsters like you!"
"Monsters like me?" I laughed—deep, rumbling, and still somehow adorable in my juvenile form. "Dude, I hatched like four days ago. I've melted exactly one mountain and flicked one A-rank party into next week. You're out here with a prophecy and a glow stick. Who's the real threat?"
The assassin nocked an arrow. The tank raised his shield. The mage finished her chant.
Sato activated his ultimate without another word.
[Holy Sword System Skill: Judgment of the Heavens – SSS Rank]
Effect: Summons a pillar of divine light that purges all evil within a 500-meter radius. Cooldown: 24 hours.
The sky split open. A beam of pure white light thicker than a subway train slammed down toward me, burning away leaves and turning the ground to glass mid-fall. The party cheered like they'd already won.
I didn't move.
I just opened the System menu in my mind and casually allocated ∞ into Defense.
The pillar hit my scales and shattered. Holy light exploded outward in a fireworks show of sparkles and broken runes. The beam rebounded, ricocheted off a tree, and singed the mage's robe. She yelped and dropped her staff.
I stood up slowly, stretching like a cat after a nap. My tail swished lazily, knocking over a century-old oak like it was a toothpick.
"Nice light show. Felt like a strong breeze. You done?"
Sato's face went pale. "Impossible… the Goddess said nothing could withstand Judgment of the Heavens!"
"Goddess sounds like she needs to update her patch notes." I took one step forward. The entire party took three steps back. "Look, Kenji. We're both isekai guys. We both died stupid deaths. Why are we doing the whole 'hero vs demon lord' routine? I'm not even a demon lord. I'm just a dragon who wants to eat good food and maybe bully a god or two. Go find a real evil overlord. There's gotta be one around here somewhere."
The healer raised her staff desperately. "Don't listen to him! He's corrupting your mind!"
I flicked a single point into Presence.
The aura that rolled out of me was gentle—by my standards. To them it felt like staring into the abyss while the abyss stared back and offered free ramen. The entire party dropped to their knees. The assassin's bow clattered to the ground. The tank's shield slipped from numb fingers.
Sato stayed standing, but his sword arm trembled.
I shrank down into my human form—black hair, blood-red eyes, simple black robe with void embroidery that the System auto-generated because "main characters don't shop." I walked up and patted Sato on the head like he was a disappointed puppy.
"Level up more, man. You're embarrassing the isekai community. Go grind some goblins or something. Come back when you can at least scratch my scales."
Tears actually welled up in his eyes. Not from pain—from pure existential crisis. "I… I was supposed to be the hero…"
"You still can be," I said kindly. "Just not my hero. Go save a village. Rescue a princess. Whatever. Leave the broken dragon alone. I've got infinite points to spend and a mom who's probably worried I skipped lunch."
Sato turned and ran. The party scrambled after him, tripping over roots and each other. One of them dropped a shiny ring—probably a rare drop. I picked it up, examined it, and tossed it into my pocket dimension for later.
[Quest Complete: First Hero Encounter – Non-Lethal Edition]
Reward: +10,000,000 Attribute Points (you were going to get those anyway)
[New Title: Hero Humiliator]
[Skill Unlocked: Psychological Warfare – Dragon Edition (Passive)]
I laughed softly, reverting to dragon form and flopping back onto my log. The forest slowly stopped trembling. Birds started singing again—cautiously.
Lirael's telepathic voice drifted in from miles away, warm with amusement. "Kurogane. Did you just make the Hero of Prophecy cry?"
"Technically he ran away crying. Big difference."
"I'm so proud I could cry."
I grinned, fangs flashing. "Save the tears for when the real gods show up, Mom. This was just the tutorial boss."
The sun dipped lower. I summoned a floating System window and started theory-crafting my next infinite dump. Maybe put a trillion into Charm just to see how many waifus the System would spawn by accident.
For the first time since hatching, I felt a tiny flicker of something that wasn't pure chaos.
…Nah. Probably just heartburn from the wyvern.