Raihan was finally back in his sanctuary. The door was triple-locked, the curtains were drawn, and his World's Softest Pillow was waiting for him. He took a bite of his croissant and sighed in relief.
"Finally. No more monsters, no more walking, just me and my dreams."
[Ding! Warning: Intruders detected at your front door!]
[Status: Level 5 Annoyance—Media Reporters and Social Media Influencers.]
BAM! BAM! BAM!
"Mr. Pajama Hero! Open up! We saw you take down the Iron-Hide Rhino with a single trip! Was that a hidden ancient martial art?" a high-pitched voice screamed from outside.
Raihan groaned, burying his face in his pillow. "Go away! I'm retired!"
"Sir, you are only 21!" another voice shouted. "The Hero Association wants to give you a Silver Medal and a monthly salary!"
Raihan froze. Monthly salary? That sounded like money for doing nothing. But then he remembered—a salary meant having a job. A job meant... shudder... working.
"Tell them I'm dead!" Raihan yelled back.
[Ding! New Sudden Quest: The Great Escape!]
[Objective: Leave your apartment through the bathroom window without being caught by the cameras.]
[Reward: Skill—'Presence Erasure' (Level 1). You become invisible if you stand still for 10 minutes.]
Invisibility? Now that was a skill Raihan could get behind. If people couldn't see him, they couldn't ask him to save the world.
He lazily crawled toward his bathroom. He didn't even stand up; he just rolled across the floor like a human burrito. He reached the small window and looked out. It was a long drop, but there was a dumpster filled with soft trash bags below.
"Gravity, do your thing," Raihan whispered, letting himself fall out of the window.
[Skill Activated: Lazy Fall!]
Instead of crashing, Raihan descended like a feather. He landed on the trash bags with a soft poof. He was safe. Or so he thought.
As he crawled out of the alleyway, he bumped into a group of men in black suits. They were guarding a shiny black limousine. In the middle of them stood a girl with silver hair and a sharp gaze—Seraphina, the Rank-A Hero known as 'The Valkyrie'.
"So, you're the one," Seraphina said, crossing her arms. "The man who defeated a Class-D beast while wearing pajamas. I've been looking for you."
Raihan looked at her, then looked at the trash can next to him. "Sorry, you have the wrong guy. I'm just the garbage man."
[Ding! System Alert: Lie Detected. Seraphina is a 'Human Lie Detector'.]
"You're lying," Seraphina narrowed her eyes. "Your mana signature is off the charts. Fight me. If you win, I'll leave you alone. If I win, you join my Hero Team."
Raihan's heart sank. A fight? That was the most energetic thing a person could do.
"Can't we just play Rock-Paper-Scissors?" Raihan asked hopefully.
"No. Draw your weapon!" Seraphina dashed forward, her spear glowing with golden light.
Raihan didn't even reach for a weapon. He was too tired from the jump. He just leaned against the brick wall and closed his eyes. "Wake me up when you're done..."
As the spear was about to touch his chest, his 'Presence Erasure' skill accidentally kicked in because he was standing so still.
WHOOSH! Seraphina's spear hit nothing but air. She stumbled forward, losing her balance. Raihan, still leaning against the wall, accidentally stuck out his foot to keep himself from sliding.
TRIP!
The Rank-A Hero, the pride of the city, tripped over a lazy man's slipper and fell face-first into the dumpster Raihan had just jumped out of.
[Ding! Rank-A Hero Defeated (Accidentally)!]
[Exp Gained: 10,000!]
[Level Up! Level Up! Level Up!]
[New Title: The Accidental God.]
Raihan stared at the dumpster. "Well... that happened. Can I go back to sleep now?"
[System: Host, you just knocked out the city's favorite hero. Your 'Laziness' is becoming a global legend.]
Raihan put his hands in his pockets and walked away. "I hate this system."